Tears of the Soul (self Harm) Posted: 09-09-05 09:44am
I was just thinking over my journey this
past week. I came to a new realisation.
Even though I have not self harmed in any
way, in well over a year now, I always
wondered what the significance of it was,
and during an evening of tears during the
week, I realised it was due to the fact
that for years, I couldn't cry. I now
realise that the self harm, was my way of
releasing the tears inside of me. If I
couldn't cry, well at least my body was,
in an obscure kind of way - that being
through the release of blood. I remember
saying in therapy on a couple of
occasions, that it was the release of
blood that I needed - none of the other
methods of trying to stop would work (eg
ice cubes, elastic bands etc).
Congrats! "even though I have not self
harmed in any way, in well over a year
now"
i couldn't cry after being on meds for
depression for a year but I never ever
wanted to hurt myself , I just wanted to
find ways of healing myself.
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Atropos
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 Aug 2005 Posts: 16 Location: California
Posted: 09-10-05 16:28pm
I guess it's different for everyone. I
cut, and I can cry. But what you said
does make sense. Speaking of other
methods - had you ever tried a red marker?
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irishamethyst
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Jul 2005 Posts: 75 Location: Ireland
Posted: 09-11-05 11:47am
No - never tried the red marker method.
Don't think it would have worked though,
as at the time, I needed to feel the
trickle - hard to explain. I know for
some, other methods helped to cut back on
behaviours, but for me, they just didn't
"cut it" (sorry for the pun)
