I Have Depression But....

Hi,

why does your mum feel the need to tell these professionals that you have a mental illness? Does she believe that it will affect the quality of your treatment at all?Do you believe that the professionals treat you differently after you mum as conversed with them?

Low self esteem is often related to depression and anxiety. Are you currently recieving any professional help for your depression? Do you think it would be helpful if you did seek help in the form of therapy or anti-depressant medication - or are you not able to take this medication due to complications with your kidneys? I am also almost 23 years old and to be honest I take it as a compliment when people tell me I look younger :wink:

i also have had problems with self worth - but my self esteem as increased alot within the last few years, mainly due to being sucessful with education and being able to prove myself to people. Why do you feel that people look down on you - do you think that maybe they pick up on your self esteem problems, by the way in which you present yourself -through your speech and body language?
Do you have hobbies or interests at all??I used to find it quite difficult to answer this question because I never used to have any interests but with time I started to discover myself more and find out what I wanted out of life which as really helped with my confidence.

Hope things start improving for you soon.
Take care of yourself.

Im going back to see my psychologist, but my mother has told me that she will continue to call and discuss me with this woman, or any other professional I go to see as she feels as my mother she is allowed to 'butt in'. Its really wearing me down, I cant take much more and with all the crap going on in my life I dont need my mum doing this. She has told me that any mum would do this, even if the professional wont discuss me with them, she'll keep talking.

Im literally at my wits end. The counsellor mum thinks is 'helping' is telling me I need to leave my living situation which isnt financially possible at this point, and the one who actually helped me mum didnt like cos she wouldnt discuss me with mum. Im out of tactics. Help if possible??

Even if your mom is doing all of this for you and it's getting on your nerves, think of it this way: she must really love you and care for you if she's going through all of the trouble to see if you are depressed.

As for being 23 and looking 20-my brother had the same problem, but he's the king of the world now. He lives in nyc with an apartmant (he's 25 now) and although a long workday, is very succesful. Don't let physical appearence get to you-most people worry about how you are on the inside, not the outside.

And for the low self esteem, which I have had occasionally, just try to make friends. Find people to talk to, who you can relate to; trust me; it helps. I went to school and all of the kids were jerks. Then I went to sleepaway camp for the first time and made many new friends. When I went back to school I made many friends and feel great now. So don't be shy-try to make friends.

Being invisible has its advantages... And milk it. The outside world ain't that great, stay at home, waste your mother's resources as long as possible(but always have an out planned). And then say, lata biatchez, i'm out.

Ahhh...Do what you think is right. If you liked that counsler, then go for that one. It is what you need, not your mom. Explain that to you mom. You are the one suffering from depression, and you need the treatment that you desire. Peace and god bless

howard

Your mum thinks she has the right to talk to your counselor about you??? And the counselor does??? Excuse for getting a little angry here, but that is completely unacceptable, counter all professional ethics, etc. Etc. -- and your mum has huge problem with personal boundaries! At 23 you have every right to be treated (respected!) as an adult, and it's clear that she doesn't do that (i could understand her behaviour if you were 8...Perhaps).

I'm not surprised at all that the counselor you liked is the only one with integrity (i.E., the one who wouldn't talk to your mum). Your mum is not helping you at all, she is hurting you and holding you back. I would say that you need to get out from her sphere of influence, but I know that is easier said than done (finances, we love our parents and don't want to hurt them, etc.). I do think that you feel a lot better if you could put together a plan for how you will be able to become your own person (get the finances figured out); from what i've heard you say, it seems the like the highest priority is getting together enough funds to see the counselor you like, and then you could get his/her help in pulling together the rest of the plan.

As far as looking young goes -- people always thought I looked way younger than I was (still do); when I was 25, they were all amazed that I had graduated from college (because they all thought I was 18 or 19). But once you feel confident about yourself, your age will be irrelevant, trust me (and if anything, you will impress people with how wonderful you are "at such a young age" hehe).

Also, there are websites that have some reasonably-priced self-help processes (and one free process) that actually work (trust me, i've had to do some personal research to figure out which ones!); you can email me if you want to let you know which one, since we are not supposed to talk about specific products here (they are just things I have used that worked for me, not anything I benefit from in any way by telling you about them).

Ok this is realy stange but, for some stange reason when i'm depressed i'm happy. I get mad and sad and upset and all, but I don't know how I could be happy w/out my depression. It gives me a stange feeling that allows me to think. But does anyone know why my deppression makes me happy.

Im not 'happy' as it would be when im depressed, but ive been low for so long now im content when im alone and just sitting alone in my room. Lately too, ive been afraid of crowds, I went to the shops early one morning and freaked out in the crowds. I couldnt breathe, became hot and started shaking. Some woman bumped me and I lost it and ran straight out of the shopping centre, then forgot where my car was so ran all the way home. I cant go into shopping centres anymore, I freak out in crowds of 6 or more people. Im becoming a hermit and I hate it, but im ok with staying home.