Magicalxlust

it sounds like she's just really excited about her grandbaby and wants to help out. Is this your first baby? My moms coming to stay with me after I have my baby for a week or two to help me get the hang of it, i'm excited about her helping me out.....But with a mother n law it's kinda different-(you mentioned your boyfriends mom but it's easier to just say mother n law even though she's not because you and her son are not married). But I do understand your point of view I get along w/ mother n law but after being around her too long I get annoyed....She's the type she always needs my husband to run stuff for her, cut her grass, pick up her perscriptions, etc. It's like can't you do anything for yourself? Because a man is supposed to leave his parents and cling to his wife after getting married.

Anyways back to the subject.....I understand where you are coming from, talk to your boyfriend and just be careful how you word things....But just let him know how you feel, make a point that you appreciate her wanting to stay and help both of you out but that you do want to spend time with your new baby and him alone. Hopefully she'll only be at your place for a week but not too long.

Hope this helps.....And best of luck!

~nikki~
just turned 21,
married about 10 months,
4 1/2 months pregnant with our first baby. :)

Hi girls!

I can relate to you. My mother lives 5000 km away, and hasn't seen my son at all. He's a little over 4 months, but my mother and law lives in the same town. She drives me medical question bonkers. Calls every day, comes over unexpected. When I first came home it was bad. I was breastfeeding and I didn't want anyone around. I wanted to do it all myself, didn't want any help or advice. I have always been a very independant person. All I wanted to do was sleep the first couple weeks after getting out of the hosital, and baby did too. There was no need for her to be around although..Sometimes she flat out demanded.
You have to stand your ground. Maybe ask her to stay away until the baby is a month old. You do need to bond, and are you breast feeding?. I mean if you are that is another good excuse for her to not come right away. Its not like she can use your boobs to feed her grandchild....She can't get up in the middle of the night to feed the baby while you sleep. There is basically no need for her for the first little bit, unless she wants to scrub your toilet for you.

Let me know how you make out!!

What I can advice to you is to try and clear your mind from worrying 'bout your mother in law. What is important is the arrival of your new baby! Don't let other things spoil this beautiful experience....
Other way of looking at it is to consider yourself lucky. Not all people get the attention and affection from mother in laws specially in looking after their grandchild. I am sure she just hopes what is best for you and your baby. I am on my 6th month and being pregnant and living overseas is not easy. Family is not always there to look after you. And getting help (nanny or helper) is a bit expensive. I asked my mum to come and support me when I deliver our baby. And it gives me great relief that she will be with us when it happens. That baby is definitely due very soon. Wish you all the best.