Hi Ambience,
I know exactly what you're going through...because I am too. I started taking cipralex about 8 months ago. I started on 5mg and went up to 10 and then up to 20 gradually over time. Dumb me...about 7 days ago due to financial reasons, I thought that I didn't need it anymore and that it would be no big deal to stop cold turkey. This is where my mistake was, as I've read up on every aspect of the drug and know, that if you're going to go off of it...you should ween yourself off slowly.
Well let me tell you...it's been pure hell for the past 4 days, and I am going to run...not walk, to the pharmacy and get my prescription. I didn't realize just how much good they were doing me until I went off of them. The first 3 days weren't bad and I was handling it pretty good...day 4 hit and WOW...I thought I was going nuts. Day 1 of the 4 days, started off with major irritablitly and no patience and feeling angry. Day 2 pretty much the same thing only amplified more. Day 3 I woke up with a headache along with the other sympoms...and last night was the worse,..I felt majorly sad and depressed along with everthing else. I could not stop crying for about 3 hours. My good friend has been have a lot of major health issues and she has a wound that will not heal and I've been taking care of her and her dog and her needs and found myself feeling resentful and angry...which I normally wouldn't feel. Last night I started thinking about her perdicament and felt bad for her and started crying and could not stop. Along with the sadness came major feelings of guilt for feeling resentful. Today I'm having a lot of anxiety.
So, I am going to get my prescription today and continue on with them...and yes now I know that they were helping me, and If I ever decide to stop taking them, I will do it the proper way...by weening myself off slowly.
By the way...I worked my way up to 20 mg., and found they worked fine for me. When I first started taking cipralex, I started off at 5 mg. and worked my way up. I had some anxiety and weird dreams at the start, but they went away pretty quick, and once the medication kicked in I was fine.
The only thing that I find while on the drug is that all though it works fine for my anxiety, I found I still had days where I would get depressed...although not as bad as when I wasn't taking it.
Good luck on your endevour, and hang in there...you are not alone.