Stomach, Ulcers, Gastric Bypass Forum - Gastric Bypass Tears And Fears

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Q: Gastric Bypass Tears And Fears

asked by: Messina on July 26th, 2005

New User

:? Hi, my name is messina and I am a 31 year old mother of two and a newly married . I am 5'5 and 226 lbs. I have chronic back pain, but no other medical complications. I get extremely depressed because of my weight and I feel so unhappy and uncomfortable in my skin. My husband is totally against bypass surgery and vows not to discuss or hear of it in any form or fashion. He told me to just do what I have to do, but he does not agree with it nor will he support me. But my biggest concern is not him, it's me. I love food, food is my friend, I lean on it when I get down, happy, sad etc. And the thought of not being able to eat scares me. Although I know I need to find an alternative source for my depression, and that food ultimately is not the answer and I am miserable being fat, I have no real desire to give up the food on my own. I want to eat, and lose the weight which is impossible. I opted not to have the gastric ring, because ultimately it is so easy to cheat past it, and well.. I know I would. Gastric bypass surgery is my only alternative to control my eating, my urges, and my weight. However, I am so freaking scared. I am terrified of what "could" go wrong. I have no room in my life for complications. I have two small children, and a husband, and not to mention my obligation to work. My mother is really pushing me to have the surgery, she knows how much better I will feel thin, and how my depression could possibly even just go away all together, and my self-esteem would reappear. I didn't even get dressed today, because I didn't want to put on any fat clothes. I get tired of looking for something "comfortable" to wear. Most of my clothes are tight, and I refuse to go shopping in the "fat girls" store. I'm sick of flowers and elastic waist bands. I want some real clothes! I want to wear a belt, and need it! I want to wear my shoulders out, and not feel self conscious about the lower part of my arm flapping in the wind. Or the rolls on my back hanging out. I want to make love to my husband, without feeling ashamed or tired. I want to live again. I don't mind exercising and have done so and lost weight successfully, but it always comes back. Slowly.... But surely, and that is what made me consider gastric bypass. I'm sick of the struggle. I'm sick of the yo-yo weight loss. I want something permanent! If there is anybody out there who is will to talk to me, and help me over my fear of this surgery please... I would appreciate it. However, if there are people out there who have horror stories, or have lost a loved one, please... I need to hear that too. This is a big decision and a permanent one, I need to be sure about what i'm doing, or not going to do. - thanks

Replies(3)

deathlykisses

replied on July 27th, 2005

New User

Im melissa, im 20 im 58 im 250, I lost 40 pounds withen the past 7 monthes, from exersise, I dont deny myself eating my fav foods I just limit what I have I have a slice or two of pizza, I dont drink soda or sugary drinks I drink water, tea, and crystalight, I eat fruit, veggies for snacks, yogurt, protein, carbs arefine I use whole wheatbread, instead of pork for break fast. I started using turkey sausage and turkey bacon for breakfast. If I want something sweet I have a cookie or brownie, I exersize 1 hour every night before bed, the only problem with losing a lot of weight is the extra skin, I plan to be 160 be fore thi time next year, I gotta work a litte harder, im not gonna have surgery, all you need is support and motivation, you cant fix the out side until u fix the insede, you have to learn to love youself and say to urself your beautiful, then you can lose the weight, I went throughthell a a teen because of peopl makling fun ofme even my dad and sister called me names. Good luck to you if you ever need to talk you cand talk to me, im younger than you but I know a lot about life, I ike to say I have an old soul

jagsawyer

replied on August 3rd, 2005

New User

Gastric Bypass

Hello messina. My name is jagsawyer. I am 31 years old and I had the gastric bypass two years ago this summer. I weighed 240 pounds and now I weigh 130 pounds. The surgery part was easy but I won't lie the first six weeks of being on a liquid diet is hell. I struggled. I really wanted to eat.

But once I started eating, I could barely eat. I was full right away. There were really no more urges to eat because of the surgery. You could no longer enjoy your food. My days of going to the buffet line three or four times were done. I now can eat only a small part of my food.

I lost all my weight in about 9 months with intense exercise of about 3 hours a day. 1 hour before work and two hours in the evening. I am not as strict now, I am just working to maintain my weight. With school starting again I will start focusing on losing about 20 more pounds this year. So I will have to factor in exercise again. I gave up soda altogether. I still eat food high in fat way too often and I am working on cutting those items out of my diet. Sometimes the high fat foods and sugary foods will make you sick. I have exerpience that often.

I would never take back the surgery. Have you even started the process to get approved for the surgery through your insurance? You didn't mention that. Usually you have to go through some sessions with a shrink, make sure you do that. It would help you to discuss your fears with someone who won't judge you. Your husband will come around. Mine didn't want me to have the surgery but after watching me commit myself to exercise and diet like never before he realized I was serious. I think in some ways he is really proud of me.

I hope this works out for you. Good luck.

kosbourn

replied on November 14th, 2005

New User

Gastric Bypass

Hi messina,my name is kosbourn.I am 31 years old and I had the gastric bypass surgery in 2003.It's hard to advise you to have the surgery because I had alot of complications with mine.I had the surgery in august 15, 2003 the first time.Well the doctor that done it didn't sew me up good the first time and they had to take me right back in there the very next morning.I had to stay 65 miles away from my 2 year old son for 14 days.That was very hard.I had tubes comming out of my sides and stomach,dealing with all of that,while in the hospital,i somehow got pneamonia in my right lung.So I really don't know what to say,but now I always feel very tired and weak.I hope the best for you.All the luck in the world

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