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I Feel Terrible!

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For the past two months, I have gone through a lot of changes in my life, as well as a lot of stress and depression. I went through a custody battle over my children, moved out of my boyfriends house, back into my own...Long story, but we are still together. Got pregnant, it was totally unplanned, and definitely unwanted by the father....I lost it, had a miscarriage at nearly 8 weeks. I am financially barely making it, my cat got taken to the pound by animal control because he was outside, therefore he was"farrell" and put down right away, not even given his 3 days for me to go claim him ( I called the very next day)....There basically has been a giant shitcloud parked over me for quite some time.


I think that I am depressed, but cannot go on prozak because it puts me to sleep, and I have 2 small children to raise. I cry at the drop of a pin, and lash out at my children over nothing. I do not eat or sleep properly, and am constantly fatigued. I can sleep for 8 hours at night, and still need a nap in the afternoon. Generally, I eat healthy, and drink lots of water...I am overweight, though I am always on the go....


Saturday night, I started feeling like I have a kidney infection. I had the worst pain known in my right side, near my spine, shooting through my abdomen. Also started with a headache. Sunday, there were times that I could barely move, and the headache just wouldn't go away, almost feels like a hangover, like I am dehydrated, though I have been drinking glass after glass of water for 2 days now. It is now tuesday, and the headache has gotten worse, feeling more like a migrane now, I have had chills for the past 24+ hours, just can't seem to get warm, even cranked up the heat to like 80 last night. My kids were sweating, and I was shivering. My eyesight is weird, like I have spots and such, and sudden movements almost make me queasy. I have been drinking over a gallon of water everyday since sunday, and still feel dehydrated. Unquenchable thirst. The totally weirdest thing though is that my skin hurts! It feels like I have needles inside of my clothes. If I rub, or roll over on the sheets, it feels like someone has nails on a board and dragging it across my body. I have had this ocasionally in the past few months, but has never lasted more than a few hours. This time it has been here since saturday night.

I totally do not have the money to go to the doctor, although "they" claim that I make too much money at +/- 19,000 a year to get any kind of aid, for either me or my children. They do not take into consideration that I have a mortgage, a car payment, insurances to go with both, two children to support.....Yahde..Yahde..Ya...If I didn't have any of this stuff and lived in section 8 housing, then I guess I would qualify....Working class is not allowed to fall on hard times I guess....I just do not know what to do.....

Does anyone have any answers to help me out????
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replied November 18th, 2003
Extremely eHealthy
Have you been to church lately? It might help to give you enregy and newfound hope.
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replied November 18th, 2003
No, actually I haven't. 2 reasons: I get home from work about 2-3am from work on saturday night/sunday morning, and is real hard to get back up at 7 to put on stockings and "my sunday best" to go to church. I say bed time prayers with my kids each night....But the other reason that I have not been, is because I am kind of mad at god.....I was actively using protection not to get pregnant and I get pregnant anyway...This was the second pregnancy with this man, and I figured god wanted me to have it. It almost split us up over it, he totally did not want me to have it, and I would not have an abortion. I finally get used to the idea that I am pregnant, and that this will be a good thing, I really did want to have another baby, just this wasn't the best time...Then he goes and takes it away from me....Costing over $5,000, I could have had an abortion for 200!!! They basically did the same thing, they sucked a dead baby out of me, instead a live one....I know i'm being brash right now, but I am still p/o'ed about the whole thing.

God does things for a reason, yet he doesn't show his reason as clearly...


(p.S.) I did capitalize the g for god and the h in he and him, but it did not go thru, I am not disrespectful like that. Confused
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replied November 18th, 2003
Extremely eHealthy
I understand about the capitals. But you know. Maybe the reason for you getting pregnant, is for you to see that guy wasnt the one. You might not see the reason now, but you will. Its just things for you to learn about .God. But im sure if you went to a bible study or something. Maybe read the bible when you have time. Youll learn. You can be mad at him but he will always be forgiving and loving to you. Maybe the things he blesses you with, he shows you how fast it can be taken. And your lucky to have all that you do right now. I have bad times but I get over it and more good time come. Just be patient with your family. And dont be so sad or upset. You have things to enjoy.
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replied November 18th, 2003
Nikki....I know there are always people who have it worse that you do...And I am very thankful for the two beautiful, happy, healthy children that I do have. I cherish every moment that I spend with them. I am thankful for the roof over my head (with the foreclosure pending), and the car that I drive (with the repo notice that I received)....But none of this talk about .God. Is making me feel any better. I know he loves me, and that he does things for reasons, but I need more that that right now!
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replied November 18th, 2003
Extremely eHealthy
Well what more is it that you want?
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replied November 18th, 2003
Experienced User
the New Improved Madeline Dennison!
I think you are not sick your just tring to think of yourself. If you are over weight a health club is cheaper that the quarter pounder at mc donalds! If you are cold in 80 degrees, my biggest advice is to
1. Ask your doctor or
2. Go live in flordia. Cool if you only make enogh to pay the stuff you listed there is such thing as a better paying job. Get a life!!!!!!!! Neutral stop thinking of yourself when people in africa are starving to death!!!!!!!!!!!!! Madeline dennison
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replied November 18th, 2003
Re: I Feel Terrible!
jocelynmorgan wrote:
for the past two months, I have gone through a lot of changes in my life, as well as a lot of stress and depression. I went through a custody battle over my children, moved out of my boyfriends house, back into my own...Long story, but we are still together. Got pregnant, it was totally unplanned, and definitely unwanted by the father....I lost it, had a miscarriage at nearly 8 weeks. I am financially barely making it, my cat got taken to the pound by animal control because he was outside, therefore he was"farrell" and put down right away, not even given his 3 days for me to go claim him ( I called the very next day)....There basically has been a giant shitcloud parked over me for quite some time.



I think that I am depressed, but cannot go on prozak because it puts me to sleep, and I have 2 small children to raise. I cry at the drop of a pin, and lash out at my children over nothing. I do not eat or sleep properly, and am constantly fatigued. I can sleep for 8 hours at night, and still need a nap in the afternoon. Generally, I eat healthy, and drink lots of water...I am overweight, though I am always on the go....



Saturday night, I started feeling like I have a kidney infection. I had the worst pain known in my right side, near my spine, shooting through my abdomen. Also started with a headache. Sunday, there were times that I could barely move, and the headache just wouldn't go away, almost feels like a hangover, like I am dehydrated, though I have been drinking glass after glass of water for 2 days now. It is now tuesday, and the headache has gotten worse, feeling more like a migrane now, I have had chills for the past 24+ hours, just can't seem to get warm, even cranked up the heat to like 80 last night. My kids were sweating, and I was shivering. My eyesight is weird, like I have spots and such, and sudden movements almost make me queasy. I have been drinking over a gallon of water everyday since sunday, and still feel dehydrated. Unquenchable thirst. The totally weirdest thing though is that my skin hurts! It feels like I have needles inside of my clothes. If I rub, or roll over on the sheets, it feels like someone has nails on a board and dragging it across my body. I have had this ocasionally in the past few months, but has never lasted more than a few hours. This time it has been here since saturday night.


I totally do not have the money to go to the doctor, although "they" claim that I make too much money at +/- 19,000 a year to get any kind of aid, for either me or my children. They do not take into consideration that I have a mortgage, a car payment, insurances to go with both, two children to support.....Yahde..Yahde..Ya...If I didn't have any of this stuff and lived in section 8 housing, then I guess I would qualify....Working class is not allowed to fall on hard times I guess....I just do not know what to do.....


Does anyone have any answers to help me out????
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replied November 19th, 2003
Active User, very eHealthy
Sweetie god does not care what you wear on the outside. Its what is on the inside. We have people show up at our church in the scruffiest clothing you can imagine and they spend the whole time smiling, singing and praising the lord. Its whats in your heart sweetie. I'm here if u want to talk. Much love melissa
pm me if u want i'd love to get to know you and help you. Smile
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replied November 21st, 2003
Ok, so I thought I was coming to a health forum, where I could posibly get some answers to why I was feeling so bad, but aparently not...I came to a jesus board, where everyone criticizes....So hypocritical, but most are.

Madeline, you aren't even in the least bit funny with your !**@! about the health club being cheaper than mcd's...I do not eat at mcd's, and I do work out...And as far as the go live in florida thing, you are just an a**h**e...I was writing to try to get some real advice, from what I thought was a health forum. And let me guess, you never, never think about yourself, or whine when things don't go right, and you feel like !**@!, and it won't go away....No, I bet you are to f*****g good for that! I know there are people who have it worse than me, but you would probably cry a little if what you think of as your perfect little everyday world you live in got totally ripped apart, and you were about to lose everything.......Sorry if I misinterpreted things.....

Mommy2b, thank you for the little support you left, but I do not feel welcome here, and just cuz I thought I typed in healthforum, I thought that someone might have felt this way, and not be so judgemental....

See ya later....Jerks
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replied November 21st, 2003
Active User, very eHealthy
Email me i'll talk to you and help :d lovergirl316@hotmail.Com i'll talk to you and nothing will be shared to another soul and i'll try and help and I wont bring the religion thing in anymore I really do want to help you. Much love melissa
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replied January 13th, 2004
The pain sounds like the same thing that happen to me .It is either a kidney or blader infection.You need to go to the doctor or emergancy room .The fever and sore all over the body is all th symptoms~!Hope this helps you ! Goo luck with your depression~!
Good luck
vikingchic~!
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