Hey girls,
as most of you know im 16 and still a
virgin...However, i've been thinking and I
want to start taking birth control, so my
body can get used to it, before I decide
to have sex...When it happens I want to be
as protected as possible from everything,
but my question to you guys is, how do I
tell my mom? She's always told me I can
come to her whenever I need to, and
there's nothing we can't overcome as a
family, or me and her...We've even had the
sex talk, and I was like so you mean to
tell me if I asked to be put on bc then u
would be okay with it? And she told me
that she would give me her opinion on the
subject, but she said ultimately she knows
if somethings going to happen, its going
to happen regardless....But the scary part
is, im seeing that 23 yr old right now,
and if things keep going well, like later
on down the road, I want it to be with
him, but I dont want her to think that
we're sleeping together like right now ya
know? I want her to believe that I wanna
start it right now so that my body can get
used to it, and I can find out the side
effects I have and all of that...Im just
scared she's gonna flip and just blow
up....So does anybody have any suggestions
on how to talk to her about this? I'd
really appreciate any of your
replies....Thanks girls!
-vanessa
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youngmomtobe
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 19 Oct 2003 Posts: 728 Location: Illinois
Posted: 11-16-03 10:10am
Hey vanessa,
just sit her down adn be like mom...Im
not sexually active yet...But I was
wandering if you could help me get on b/c
so I can get used to the side effects and
let my body adjust to it....So when it
comes time for me to be ready to have sex
I will be totally protected! If shes as
understanding and easy to talk to as you
say she will probably think about it and
say yes your her daughter im sure she
would rather u on b/c than getting
pregnant ya kno? Well good luck let us
know wat happens!! Much love and god
bless u!!
Jen
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shortee913
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Sep 2003 Posts: 141 Location: michigan
Hey Posted: 11-16-03 12:17pm
If you don't want to go to your mom go to
planned parenthood or your local health
department, it's free! Good luck god
bless
much love,
sami
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casey rachelle
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2003 Posts: 56 Location: Erie, MI
Well, Posted: 11-17-03 10:13am
I agree with jen, if your mom is as
understanding as you say she is then it
should be no problem. I was the same way
with my mom too. Just make sure that
when you do decide to have sex, make sure
that it is with the right person. I know
you have heard that time and time again,
but it is a really important thing to
consider. You'll never know what it
means until you experience it. But I am
totally behind you when it comes down to
wanting to be completely protected. I
think that is the best thing for you to
do. I also give you props for being 16
and still a virgin.. You go girl! I
was 16 and still a virgin too, and I am
glad I waited as long as I did. Just
promise that you will be as careful as you
can ok?? Good luck hun!
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Mesmerizeu15
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Aug 2003 Posts: 2729 Location: Pittsburgh,PA
Posted: 11-17-03 11:39am
My grandma is the one who got me on mine,
and when I moved back in with my mother
she told me that she thought that is
pramoted sex so she took me off of it, and
then I got pregnant with sean. Well now I
am back on birth control since I am with
my grandma, and my sister called my cell
last night, "stacie, I starting having sex
with my boyfriend and I want to get on
birth-control. Please dont tell grandma."
well to make a long story short, she asked
dad who said no and then asked mom who
said it promoted sex. I am scared for her
because I dont want her to have to have a
baby. She is immature and is so young.
13!! I sure hope that everything works
out for you with your birth control. How
old are you? Do you have insurance, who
is it under?? There are ways around
things...
Loads of love, laughter, and joy!!
Stacie
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CrombieChic16
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2003 Posts: 745
Posted: 11-17-03 15:06pm
Hey girls,
thanks for all of your advice...Casey im
proud that im 16 and still a virgin too!
But its getting old! Lol, its been on my
mind for a good year now and I think im
ready, once my relationship w/ my guy
matures a little bit...Still scared though
...Stacie, im 16 and under my parent's
insurance...Im just nervous to talk to her
about it, I mean who would enjoy telling
their mom they wanna start having sex?!
Lol I dont know, I was thinking about
talking to her and getting on the pill,
and then I thought maybe I should go to
the clinic and get free bc...And then I
thought, well maybe ill just use a condom,
but I wanna be as protected as possible,
and it'll help ease my mind and make me
relax and actually enjoy it, instead of
worrying ya know? Im a huge worrier, and
I was talking to my guy about it, and the
fact that he's older makes me feel a
little better, because hes used to it and
knows what hes doing, whereas if I was
going to give myself to another virgin id
be scared sh*tless! Lol sry for my
wordchoice...But do any of you girls have
any advice on the *special night*? He was
telling me that his parents know people in
the casinos and that they can get free
rooms on certain nights....So I was
thinking maybe that...When im ready
anyway....I just want it to be as
memorable as possible, and with as little
worrying as possible...I was definitely
thinking we could do like the bubble bath
with candles all over...Ahh I cant wait!
Lol, what was everybodys first time like?
Any pointers you can give me? Im so
excited, I like wanna go now! Lol let me
know!
Vanessa
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casey rachelle
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Oct 2003 Posts: 56 Location: Erie, MI
Lol.. Posted: 11-18-03 14:17pm
I know how that feels yano?? I felt the
same way about being a virgin after all my
friends had already had sex and they told
me about it and i'm like "maaannn I wanna
be in on this" but I am just glad that I
waited to do it with my fiancee. I am
hopin that everything works out for the
best for you and your b/f. How long have
you two been together?
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CrombieChic16
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2003 Posts: 745
Posted: 11-18-03 14:26pm
Yea I know what ya mean....We've been
together for only 3 weeks, but im not
planning on sleeping with him for a little
bit....And im not like the traditional
girl where its like well I have to be with
you for 1 year 4 months and 3 days before
I do something with u lol, if im ready and
feel comfortable with it then im gonna do
it...And quite honestly, I just wanna do
it and get it over with, lol not that it
wont be special, because it will be, but I
dont wanna have to wait a year just
because thats what u should do, im sure I
sound real naive right now, but ya know
what, life's too short, so why not live
your life the way u want to, instead of
always worrying about making the right
decision all the time? Ive been through a
lot this past year and im tired of always
worrying about making the wrong
decision...Ive worried so much that I
ended up making the wrong decision anyway
becasue my head was so clouded ya know? I
dont know, im beginning to feel at ease
with this guy, and overall we're great
friends, which makes the road easier to a
relationship....I dont know, im still
scared though....Fear of the unknown....I
actually just went with my friends to get
condoms just in case we get caught up in
the moment, I wanna be protected.....Im
just sooo nervous, ah I dont know, I gotta
stop worrying, but if theres any advice u
can offer id definitely love to hear what
u have to say! Sry for the long post lol,
u can tell ive had this on my mind for a
while now...
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Mesmerizeu15
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 Aug 2003 Posts: 2729 Location: Pittsburgh,PA
Posted: 11-18-03 15:32pm
I totally know what you mean, I just
talked to my sister yesterday she lives in
north carolina, and she told me that she
started having sex with her boyfriend and
that she wants to be put on birth control,
so she asked my stepdad and he said to ask
our mom. So she asked mom and she said
the same thing that she said to me when
she took me off of it, it promotes sex.
So now my sister is relying straight on
condoms which arent a hundred percent. So
she finally had to get enough courage to
just simply tell my dad that she was
active, and he said that she could no
longer date her boyfriend. But she is a
lot younger than you, 13. Good luck!!
Stacie
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CrombieChic16
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Oct 2003 Posts: 745
Posted: 11-18-03 15:40pm
Well I guess that's sorta understandable
if your sister's only 13....Everybody's
starting so young these days! I think im
gonna hold off on talking to my mom about
birth control right now, until I become
active anyway, I mean the first couple
times we'll use condoms, but if I tell her
right now, she's gonna assume that im
sleeping with my guy...Which I will be,
lol but not right now...But anyways, I
dont know, ive got second thoughts and I
dont know what to do....Im just afraid of
the pain, and then worrying about
pregnancy, ah man this is gonna be
tough...I just wanna get on the pill so
it'll help ease my mind, but I dont know,
we'll see how things go...Ill keep u
updated on how things turn out!
Good luck with your sister
too....Hopefully your parents come around
and help her out!
Vanessa