I'm more puzzled tonight...I was offered a show in new york city coming up in august...As an artist it is a highpoint in my career. I invited my boyfriend who is bipolar to come with me, (i am paying the whole bill, hotel etc) and tonight he says that he doesnt know if he will be able to go with me. He is a musician, and I asked him to come and play at the opening, he hasn't responded to that even though it would a great thing for him to do as well and at the beginning he was really excited about it. He has been in bands for years, music is his life. I even gave him the name of the woman who does the band bookings, he never followed it up. He has been behaving very erratically lately. Not sure of what to do. Am I expecting too much?

Hi, i'm sorry I keep writing to you trying to give advise but every time I read one of your postings asking for help, I feel you and me have the same boyfriend, they are going through the same right now! I just answered you back about the Dr. Jekill posting and I answered by mistake to rammer, so you can read my reply in his theme about if it is time to break up?. That thing your boyfriend is doing is a sign of manic and he can do worst things. He is not doing it on purpose, unless he's always been irresponsible. But it sounds like not. He is definitely not taking his medication. You want to her what mine did?? After waiting for me for almost a year, patiently, because we were moving to europe, living together, he started gettig manic, so he left first with the excuse of looking for an apartment and have everything ready for when I arrived. I couldn't leave at the time because I had to sell my car and say goodbye to my family in puerto rico. We lived in miami. So he left and from europe he tells me on the phone (after I sold my car, left my full time job, left my apartment) that is not a good time for me to go and that he was sorry. If I had a gun and he was in fron of me I would have killed him. But then we kept talking on the phone (this is after I moved back to puerto rico, because I couldn't do anything, I didn't have a life anymore in miami) and I could tell he was as manic as he could get, using drugs.... So he finally found an old friend and he convinced him of going to the hospital. Now he is there, medicated and thank god they won't let him go after they think he is ready. I'm telling you this because when they get manic, they don't care about the people they love, they can do worst things than this. Your boyfriend is not doing it on purpose, he needs medication and some doctors!!

:cry: :cry: I thought I dated one of the most amazing man in the world

i feel in love with him, I had my guard up with him too, and then I let it down, now I feel like the fool, I am so embarrassed.

I am no better than the next person, yet why did this happen to me?

I am a good girl, I never been arrested, I don't do drugs, drink to much

it doesn't matter, nothing justifies his behavior.

One hour my ex was so great, we had so much fun, loving, passion, lots of laughs, common interests, life was great.

Then an hour passes, I do nothing, but somehow he says I do everything wrong, well he find something wrong and goes on and on about it, cursing, yelling

i felt trapped, scared, feeling like I was living in a dream

how could a human have the capacity to be two different people
how could someone give me roses, cuddle with me watching movies, kissing me, massaging my back and feet, saying the most loving things
just being a real nice supportive friend

and then hours later, he is yelling, cursing at me
threatening to call the cops on me for taking all his medication
( which is a complelte lie)

i gave so much to him, and now he tells me I never do anything for him

life is hard enough, how can anyone be two different people?

I do not want to involve the cops, be in the newspaper, if I call the cops for domestic stuff, this is so embarrassing
i have worked to hard in my life, for everything now to fall apart

phone calls in the middle of the nite, threatening my family memebers
when he was over the house days before helping fix things, and helping with maintenence around the house...

Ugh, so frustrating and flabergasting

i just hope I will be safe for the rest of my life...

I pray for no more drama

i can't beleive this

no matter what I said, how many times I told him I loved him, no what I did, he would still find fault,
wow, I can not believe this, god help me.

Please pray for me,

Hi, I understand you. Mine never got so bad though. But he could be also the most amazing boyfriend one second, so loving, and hours later he was screaming like crazy at me for stupid things. The explanation for this is that your boyfriend is not on medication. It's so easy for these persons to have a normal life and have their emotions in control if they take their medications every day!! But is not easy to make them take it when they are manic. You have to decide if it's worth to keep going on with the relationship or if not. If you decide to keep dating him, you have to force him to go to a psychiatrist and psicologist. Believe me, my dad is bipolar too and finally he accepted that without medication and therapy he can't have a normal life. As long as your boyfriend is taking his medicines every day, you'll se the big difference. The thing is that when they are getting manic, they love it so much, they think they are the kings of the world, and they don't want this feeling to go. So they don't take their pills. It's all about you. You have to take the decision and if you think it's not worth it or he doesn't care and doesn't look for help, as hard as it souds you should forget him because he is going to drag you down with him and you don't deserve that. My boyfriend is leaving the hospital next week after having a manic phase, really bad one. He is back to normal because it's on medications (wich they usually are: lithiuum, a natural pill, to balance the highs and lows of the brain, and anti depressants). I will talk to him seriously and tell him to get a job, because he doesn't work either and to get into a church and look for god. Because at this point I think he is the only one who could save him. This helps a lot. I hope you can solve your problem, I understand you because i've been through this before.

Hi fabi

just wanted to thank you for your support

my dad has bipolar too, he is the greatest, and he has been in hospitals, and the whole bit, but he is on different medication

sees a dr monthly for years, the same one, so that is great
and he just called me and was hyper, saying the same things over and over again, but he was happy,and funny, so that is good.

Sometimes he would be depressed just in bed all the time
so I am glad he is alive and doing well,

he has been helping me out, emotionally and fincailly a little bit

i thank god for him

my ex-boyfriend kind of reminded me of my dad, but the positive aspects, the loving, kind nature of him
my dad was never near violent, or threatening

so anyways, I am feeling sad about losing my bestfriend, I am sad I will never make passionate love with my boyfriend, the man I loved so much I would have done anything I possibly could have, we were just making plans to go on a mini vacation earlier in the day, the day we broke up
actually we broke up at 2 am, crazy

but he told me to get the f out of his house, and it was the last straw for me.

I gave too much, with his emotional unstability,
my bulimia, eating disorder resurfaced, I can not handle the stress

i need to help myself,
i am alone, feeling empty and lonely
god, I pray I can get through all of this, and in time I will be a better stronger person.

Good luck to you and your man, you are a great soul, helping him
and even me out :)
i wish you only the best
have a safe, healthy, wonderful, fun, great day today!
Thank you again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi!! I'm so sorry to hear that. Thank's to you too for your words. Don't do that to yourself!! Stop with the bulimia, you are such a good person too for trying to help him. You don't deserve to kill your body like that. If you decided not to come back with him, is because you tried everything you could and you are strong to do this. I can't do it right know. I admire your strenght. You have to keep being as strong, and quit your bulimia. I know it's not easy, jut think that now you ae going to have a normal life. It won't be easy, it doesn't matter is sunny outside, you just went through something hard, but you can't torture yourself for this, because you left something bad to fall in something worst!!. I am happy your dad is doing fine. Sorry your boyfriend doesn't want to accept your help. He will regret it one day when he is fine. As for now, think for yourself. Go to a gym or to the beach or whatever makes you happy but stop torturing yourself. My boyfriend is in intensive care right now. I think he had a bad reaction to the electro shock. I want to kill his mom for signing the paper to approve it. She is a lost soul too, doesn't know how to deal with him anymore. I m praying here for him to get out of that hospital alive as soon as possible. Please pray for him too. I will pray for you and your ex. Hope this helps, everybody has problems.

Thank's , fabi

Hey miss_demeanour, reading your first post thats my boyfriend exactly! I feel like he treats other people so much better at times...Ive made comments to him about it and hes like no I dont...(he doesnt know I know hes bipolar). Im not sure how to deal with it at times either :(

I too have a husband that is bi polar 3 and will not get help I was a single mom and two kids he was my night in white shining for about 8 months we got married and now its like I dont know him he says its me we I am in theraphy and he drinks until 4 am and sleeps till 4 or 5 I am so alone my kids are a mess so I need support to and if I can give advice it would be to take care of your self and try not to let it get the best of you because they are sick. Its not a personal vandeta

Understand people it's the disorder. I've been like that too. I'm 23 and bipolar. You must understand it's the disorder you just to read more about bipolar disorder.. When he are in mania it feels like i'm/we are on top of the world,don't need any one, don't need sleep,we feel like superman,we don't feel or see that anything is wrong.

When depressed it feels like i'm/we are broken, the depression zaps us of are energy and motovation. We get tired easily and lonely that why we get clingy etc etc. Feel free to ask any questions.