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Q: Father Material
asked by: tracey Grey on June 12th, 2005
New User
I have been married now for nearly two years. My husband and I have a great relationship and are close friends. I run a theatre school for 60 kids on saturdays, but having our own family was never really on our agenda. Although we said "if it happens, it happens".
Well, it did. And he isn't so relaxed or cool about it now. I am scared too, but mainly of what this could potentially do to our relationship if he really isn't prepared to be a father. You can't guess this stuff - how he will be after the birth, will he see it differently later etc. He has always been quite intolerant of small children and isn't particularly relaxed around them (not sure he was ever allowed to be one either).
If I abort this child, I won't have another. I'm 33. I never planned to have one either. It was always going to be an accident. The whole thing scares me too much to make an active decision to get pregnant. I would be a good mother, but ending up alone with a child is a horrible fear.
Any words of wisdom out there?
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tomz
replied on June 12th, 2005
Experienced User
Children Are a Blessing And a Gift
Give your husband and yourself a little more credit.

My wife and I have 21 month baby boy and he is nothing but a blessing and a joy. We could never imagine our lives without him.

Will being parents be easy? No. Being parents can bring fulfillment to your lives.

Children will change your focus from being less selfish and more selfless because you have a new person who is completely dependent upon your care.

Please talk with couples with children you admire and respect before giving up upon your baby.

Tom z
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rita_b
replied on June 12th, 2005
New User
Well..I'll advice you to go ahead and give birth to your baby.


I'ts highly likely that the attitude of your husband will change once he sees the tiny baby in front. He may not have a liking for children in general but since this will be his own blood product, his behaviour may be different for him.
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