Self Injury Forum - I Cut Myself to Feel Better!!!


I Cut Myself to Feel Better!!!

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roxygurl719

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 1
Location: colorado springs co

I Cut Myself to Feel Better!!! Posted: 05-22-05 08:28am


Ive become seriously depressed in the last month and I have started cutting my arm I wasent thinking when I started doing it just kinda happend and now everytime I get depressed I start cutting myself my arm is full of deep cuts I dont know what to do I cant stop I have go addictied to it it like it help the pain i'm feeling inside go a way for a short time but it is hurting me philically can you please help me I dont know what I should do I have tryed to stop but I can....... Roxy....

Tyler8635

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 10
Location: The South

Try to Stop! Posted: 05-23-05 11:49am


This really isnt good for you. If you cant stop on your own u need to get some immediate help. The longer you do it the more it will esciliate. Try anything but making yourseelf bleed. Think about it.. Its you!. Its your body.. Hold yourself higher than that. Get some anti depressants maybe and stay positive. Look at bigger pictures than little things. Hope this is of some help :)

anneschwab

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 23 May 2005
Posts: 3

Posted: 05-23-05 12:06pm


Someone in my family is a cutter as well and it is a result of being depressed. You could just try to stop, but that many times a failure. You have get outside help. This can be from a therapist or even from family. Get people involved in your depression and they can help you more than you are able to help yourself right now. If you ask for this help then you will be able to recover. If not then you will hurt yourself more and more until you won't be able to come back from it. So please ask somebody!

morris mouse

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Larkhall

I Cut Myself Posted: 05-23-05 12:29pm


If you ask for this help then you will be able to recover. If not then you will hurt yourself more and more until you won't be able to come back from it. So please ask somebody! I believe that anneschwab is right here, in that, you desperately need to get some help, before you do something that you will later regret

heatherly

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 30 May 2005
Posts: 22
Location: Switzerland

Posted: 05-30-05 16:09pm


Please find a psychiatrist. Did you suffer a trauma as a child? Recently? There is the theory that you are cutting to make the psychological pain less painful by exposing yourself to the physical pain of cutting. You need to learn to explore your inner pain. I wish you strength, friendship and love in life. It's out there.

morris mouse

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Larkhall

Cutting Myself Posted: 05-30-05 17:02pm


I wish you strength, friendship and love in life. It's out there. We all wish you well!!!

shanti1

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 20 Dec 2004
Posts: 87

How You Do Get Diminsh the Scars of Deep Cuts On My Arm? Posted: 06-25-05 12:36pm


:cry: any suggestions on this? Merderma did not help thanks, i am doing better, if I won some money, I could get skin grafts

rita_b

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 02 Jun 2005
Posts: 33

Posted: 06-26-05 07:12am


Well..You didn't mention how you are cutting your arms. If you use any sharp device or tool, then just get rid of that when you think you may get into depression. Best if you get all such sharp tools out of your house if possible. If you use your nails, I would advice you to cut your nails regularly so that the damage you may do to yourself is minimum. This is the only practical thing I can suggest you, otherwise you really seem to be quite an abnormal person to me.. I magine what you could do if you have a sword or sharp knife in your hand and you start feeling depressed. On a more serious note, I think you need a pshychiatrist's help immediately.

fish_4_all

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 25 Jul 2005
Posts: 2
Location: Washington

Reality Check Posted: 07-25-05 18:30pm


I did it for 3 years as a teen and the reason was I wanted to make sure I could feel something but numbness. I cured it by finding reality, getting out and doing things I enjoy, getting out the house as often as possible and trying to enjoy things that others didn't tell me I had to do but I wanted to do for myself. Feeling pain a lot and trying to cover it is never good, it led to me getting ulcers and almost bleeding to death from them, mental concentration problems and a diagnosed conversion disorder. Seeing a psychatrist is a good idea but don't get down on yourself because you think it is a weakness to see one. I saw one for my cutting as a teen and he helped me understand that I wasn't doing enough for myself and to keep my mind occupied on things I felt were worth while. Look at what is making you feel the pain and try to find ways to deal with the pain by doing things that make you feel good and pain free. It worked for me, but I started too late. Do it now before you effect the rest of your life with something you can't control anymore. If you can't bring yourself to see a psychiatrist right away, at least stop cutting your arms. Find a less destructive way of feeling pain like pinching yourself with a clothespin or something until you can get that much needed help.

irishamethyst

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 18 Jul 2005
Posts: 75
Location: Ireland

Posted: 09-12-05 06:16am


Please try not to get into self harm. I used to si, and it really sucked. It became more and more addictive as time progressed. For me, I finally realised, that what caused me to self harm, was my inability to cry. My body had to cry instead, seeing as I couldn't physically cry myself. On another note, do I know you? Your nick is very similar to someone I know. If you are we met initially on open diary - same name on my part anyhow. Just wondering...

lanjenjo

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 30 Sep 2005
Posts: 4

Posted: 09-30-05 23:43pm


I can relate...I used to burn myself. I think that it felt better to experience physical pain than to deal with the emotional pain that I felt at the time. It was easier, anyway. If you can challenge yourself to look at the emotional pain and what is going on in your head, then hurting yourself physically becomes less of an issue.

donnabella

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 03 Oct 2005
Posts: 35
Location: CA

I Can Relate Posted: 10-09-05 03:36am


I kno how u feel...I started cuttin in 7th grade...First I did it with a needle....I was a big follower....My cousin arrived here when I was in 7th grade....She showed me all her cuts...And at the time I had no clue wut cuttin was....She told me she did it wen times were hard....My aunt and uncle wud beat her badly...So wen she showed me she had many cuts nd once she cut sooo bad she went to the hospital..So one day I was going thru a hard time but not soo hard as what I go thru now...But first time I cut was wen I was 13....Now she doesnt cut and she like ditched me...I gues I am the one who sucked at life rite?....Well now I struggle with many things and the main topic wen I struggle is to cut but I got help and to tell u the truth it does help.....I mean im not on pills yet but I get them soon but I got diagnosed with depression...So to tell u the truth its better to get help...It took me 13 until now 17 to tell mah mom I think I have a problem...Get help love =d

kye_kye

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 09 Feb 2005
Posts: 16
Location: Sydney

Posted: 10-22-05 07:39am


I used to be like that... I always have the urge to cut, but I don't do it anymore. I promised my friend I wouldn't and I think i'm gonna stick with it. I think the best thing for you is to tell someone you know and trust, and be with your friends who make you happy. Hopefully you'll be alright. It's tough quitting it, but its bettter in the long run! I still have scars :(

RikkuAkuda

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 31 Oct 2005
Posts: 17
Location: Brighton

Posted: 10-31-05 13:51pm


I know how it is. You feel alone and don't want to move on in life anymore. But something we have to understand is that we might not be ready to be helped.Some one can't help us if we aren't ready to doso. Trust me iknow. I've been getting help for a long time but I don't seem to be getting any where, thats because I really don't want to be helped right now. I'm just so addictieds to it. But I have to find some thing eles. Cuz it is really killing me.It is.My friends don't know about it.They think i'm over it right now but i'm not.I won't be healed for a long time. Idon't want to be helped. But in a way I do. I don't want to lose my friends over something so stupid. Sometimes we need a reality check. I haven't gotten mine yet but when I do i'll be ready to stop. Just understand that your not alone. There are people out there who really want to help you. Sometimes a docter or an anti depprsante won't work, but youshould go out wikth friends. Have fun. Be your self. Let them know whats wrong in youlife insted of holding it all in. Let them in on whats wrong. They may be able to help more then any drug or docter. Remeber that :wink:

shanti1

Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy

Joined: 20 Dec 2004
Posts: 87

I Still Have Scars From When I Was a Teenager Posted: 11-05-05 11:08am


I have old noticable scars of when I was on anti depressants and I cut myself bad one day. It was a one time thing for me, I saw a dr later that day. So cutting is an old issue, I just see and everyone else can see the noticable scars on my left arm it is quite obvious, and I am not the same person, yet I look like I am one messed up person. I can not wear long sleeve shirts everyday for the rest of my life i want to save enough money for skin grafts or laser treatment or something to smooth my skin out i do not know know how expesnive it will be, or what procedure, treatment to take? One moment of a huge mistake years ago and I am literally forever scared... :cry:

RikkuAkuda

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 31 Oct 2005
Posts: 17
Location: Brighton

Posted: 11-06-05 10:11am


Stop what? Asking for help

Gwynievere

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Worldly Infected

Ritual Burnings Posted: 11-06-05 22:22pm


I am 22 years of age, a somewhat healthy woman, a moderate smoke, occasional drinker, but in good fit. I have been singeing my skin since I was 17. I see no guilt in it. My perciedure is simple, I lite a wooden match, wait for the ember to turn red, the wave it out and press it steadily to my inside wrist, and sometime on the sides of my ankles. It is like, to use the expression "taking a chill pill" not only do I feel a rush of adrenilin from crushing a burning hot ember into my skin. Its like tattoos but shorter. You still sometime get a scar but it is less scar-ful than the tradition "cutting" it safe, pratical and there are really no bad side effects. Why I do this some, ok, many have asked. It is to feel a detacted but still here feeling, like emersing yourself in a hot bath, call me crazy, but I havent got my papers yet, I think on an unpopular level of thinking, which most of society does not agree with, but a long time ago, (about the time I started burning) I gave up on worring about what people think of me, I feel that in these "burning" it paved the way that I feel towards society. I feel if in society's eyes I have a problem, or that I feel I have one in itself, I do this self mutalation to justify so that I can function right in society's eyes. I could never metion this secret, because I cure myself, if I feel too tense, severely depressed, or even slightly suidsiada, (cant even spell it) I seign my skin, I again do not think that it is bad, I am not putting my life at threat, i'm not harming anyone, the only aftermath is a couple of scars that fade with time. I hope someone out there agrees, but if not, wouldnt be the first. Thanks for reading this.

HappyHarry

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 17 Oct 2005
Posts: 10
Location: New Jersey

Ok Posted: 11-06-05 22:27pm


Seriously how do you help someone like this, besides some serious thereapy. Why would anyone cut themself??? What is the point? Ok if you think your ugly, lets cut myself to make myself uglier! Lol wow. Lets all mutilate our arms for no reason. I dont understand it. Maybe one of you could explain.

Miss_Tabby

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 1
Location: Oregon

I Agree... Posted: 11-06-05 23:43pm


I think that the girl needs real help. There is a difference between dangerous and safe in this paticular subject. The girl who posted this at the very top has a problem because she wants "to stop, but can't". This is dangerous. This girl obviously cannot hold her own. She needs someone! Anyone to watch over her. To gwen, a couple posts above... You know what you are doing and honestly you're not really subjecting yourself to any real health factors. Compared to what other people are subject to do for a temporary satisfaction , gwen, you aren't hurting anyone - not even yourself. You just happened to find something that makes you happy. At least it isn't crystal meth. Cheers to you, love. That is all. Tabby

Selenity

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy

Joined: 03 Jan 2008
Posts: 8
Location: Far Away From You,

Posted: 01-03-08 18:24pm


The stigma surrounding cutting is largely exaggerated in my opinion. The numbers that are quoted as "cutters" worldwide are probably under-exaggerated, however the process itself is not as evil as everyone thinks it is. I cut myself, and unlike the text books say i am not ashamed of my cuts, i was not abused or molested. I live a fortunate life where i have whatever my heart desires. I am sure many of you won't understand the need to do this to myself, i am not pretending you will. But i have scoured forums and declarations of 'cutting' everywhere and not found one that i can relate to, so perhaps this can reach just one of you. I am quite an intelligent person who understands how stupid the idea of inflicting pain upon yourself is. I drink somewhat casually, i don't smoke and i don't do drugs. For me i have the pure release of crimson. I won't pretend it's healthy. however... I would wager more people have died from Alcohol related diseases and smoking than have died from "cutting". Yes the logical person must search for some sort of justification. You smoke 100 cigarettes a week and they slowly destroy your lungs and give you cancer. I cut myself twice a week, (sometimes more sometimes less) and for those few minutes i am completely happy, completely pure and completely in touch with the idea that I am alive, and that that could change at any moment. Every cut leaves it mark on your skin, just because you can't see your damaged lungs or the damage to your liver does not mean it is not there. It is not a healthy way of expressing yourself, we are not a healthy world anymore, we are not civilized or caring. If cutting is your way of coping with these pains... Then you, like me carry a different kind of pain, a pain that is not put there for some one else to judge or criticize a pain just for you. Don't be an fool, don't go around slicing yourself with rusty knives and dismembering yourself. This for many people is an exercise in control, so don't over do it. I have around 80 bad scars, each one a reminder.. I don't regret them. I wear them with a sense of happiness that i have lived to another day. I hope you are not like me, and you actually want to stop and i wish you all the luck in the world with that. All i am saying is that there are worse things.