I am still a virgin. I've never had sex-im only 16 but my 18 year old boyfriend and I mess around but i'm waiting to have "sex." well the other day we were messing around and he was fingering me and I bled. We were going at it pretty heavily but is it possible to "break your cherry" with out having sex? I thought maybe I was going to start my period or had-but I haven't...I really don't know. Plus that would also mean i'm literally not a "virgin..." i'll still think of myself as one of course but if I go to the doctor with my mom they'll say i'm not...Does any one know...?
You can break your hymen by riding a bike, or riding a horse, or any number of things. Blood doesn't necessarily mean a broken hymen however. When your hymen does break, it generally hurts quite a bit, but not always. Your boyfriend may have broken it with his finger, or it may have already been broken, or maybe he was too rough and accidentally cut your vagina with his nails, or just by force if he doesn't have nails long enough to do that. Assuming you broke it and didn't realize it, he may have hit your cervix, as that does happen sometimes during intercourse and can cause vaginal bleeding.
Also, i'm not sure why your mother would be ask a doctor to see if your hymen was still intact, or if she doesn't ask him, why he would volunteer that information. It's not a big deal to have a broken hymen, and doesn't mean you've had intercourse. And assuming you are a virgin, there is really no need for you to have a pap smear or any other examination where a doctor would be looking inside of your vagina.
It also doesn't mean you aren't a virgin. I broke mine riding a bike when I was 8 years old, and obviously remained a virgin for a number of years after that.
The same thing happend to me with my boyfriend, and it freaked me out at first, definatly doesnt mean your not a 'virgin' anymore, and when we did it and it bled it didnt hurt me either, but im pretty positive after doing that, that is what broke it. And I think it was probably best to do that, because when I did have sex for the first time, it didnt hurt at all, I think by doing that and it had already broken there wasnt and 'breakage' going on when I had sex for the first time, which definatly makes the experience a lot better :) but don't forget, take your time, don't let your boyfriend talk you into having sex, or sneaking his way into doing that, be sure your really committed to him you don't want to regret anything!
they do pap smears for multiple reasons..............
well, a whole lot of things can break your hymen, not just getting fingered...but you still should have a pap smear because when you get a pap smear, they dont just check to see if you are a virgin, but they also check multiple different things...like they can check if cervical cancer is forming in your body, if you have a growing tumor, etc. but i really think you should still have a pap smear even if you are not a virgin...
A very subjective definition: Being sexually pure - Fingering, humping, oral sex, intercourse and anal sex disqualify you from this. This is normally the definition used in organized religions.
Objective definition: Not having had a penis inside your vagina (intercourse). This is the definition used in scientific and medical circles.
Your hymen (or 'cherry') is a totally different thing.
Your hymen forms when you are inside your mother's womb. It seals your 'insides' from your 'outsides' to prevent fluid from going inside your body while you are growing. Just before birth this membrane thins and forms a hole (in most girls). According to researchers, all girls are born with a hymen.
The hymen is a very thin mucus membrane. As you age, the hole in the hymen grows. During puberty, the hymen thickens due to the estrogen surge you experience. The hymen folds out and onto itself forming a very elastic ring around the vaginal opening with blood veins visible.
At any stage if the hymen gets torn in one place, it will generally heal although it forms a notch where it tears. If it tears right through to the vaginal wall, it might not heal but just stay torn.
Research have shown that in general, it is possible to tell if something was inserted inside the vagina before the estrogen surge. After that it becomes impossible to determine for sure if a girl was sexually active or used tampons.
When something large gets inserted inside the vagina, the hymen will tear in multiple places. If there is friction involved, pieces of the hymen will be torn off. At child birth, the remains of the hymen will be totally gone and only a slight ridge can be felt around the vaginal entrance.
The hole in the hymen can take many shapes, including a bunch of small holes (fimbriated), 2 holes with a band or bridge of membrane separating it (septate), a very small hole (microperforate) or totally closed (imperforate). An imperforate hymen will have to be surgically opened as soon as the girl starts to menstruate. Other shapes with not a very clear opening, may have to be surgically opened if they do not readily tear by itself during first time intercourse.
Before the hymen thickens, a hard bump or a straddle injury (falling and hitting your crotch on something like a branch or bike seat) can tear it as it is tightly stretched and thin and cannot absorb shock very well.
At any time, you may bleed and feel pain when your hymen tears. This is normal. You might also experience none of this. That is also normal.
A normal NSAID pain killer will help with the pain and fight infection. The bleeding should not last more than a few hours.
When you visit your doctor for a pap or gynecological exam, the results are private. When your doctor asks you if you are sexually active, you should tell the truth. It is ok to ask your doctor once again to keep your answers private. Depending on your answer, your doctor will look for different things. This is also the ideal time to ask all those questions about your anatomy that is bothering you. Ask about STDs and infections and how to avoid it as well as any birth control questions you might have. When it comes to your sexual health and well being, your doctor is your friend, not the enemy. In short, never lie to your doctor.