To get to the point, my girlfriend of 8 months has been having her bipolar problem long before I knew her. She still cuts herself when she feels upset about things.
I tell her stop and that its wrong and bad but thats not how she see's it. She says when she cuts, she doesnt cut to deep, and doesnt want to kill herself. She says all it leaves is scars and bleeds for a little bit, nothing that will kill her or bother her.
Unless I can tell her the specific sideeffects that happends when she cuts herself, she will continue to do this forever.
If anyone knows exactly what kind of physical side effects that can accure from cutting, please tell me right away now, this might be the only way to save her!!!
I'm glad you are trying to help your girlfriend. She is lucky to have someone who cares. By cutting, there are many risks. She might get an infection, she may cut a vein and could even bleed to death if she cuts too deep!! She might misjudge the severity of the cut and the cut might require stiches.
Also cutting is like a drug- it is very addictive. Soon they cannot stop. Of course there are also emotional affects- suicidal thoguths, clinical depression. If she has bipolar she has to be extra careful to not cut when she is feeling to angry or depressed or she may do soemthing irreversible.
I'm sorry if this post sounds grim and scary but it is reality unfortunately.
Please take her to see adr. Her life is at risk and she deperately needs your help. Though she may be angry at first, leter when she is better she will thank you. Good luck to you and please post again on how she's doing.
Also is she taking any mediaction for her bipolar disorder? This may also help with the cutting issue.
Shes on a form of lithium and other anti depressents. She goes to a psychologist and psychiatrist and her school councler regularly, her parents also know about the cutting and so does her doctors, this is just a regular thing for her.
But ive told her a million times that she might cut to deep one time on accident and she is sure she wont. Other than that there really is no other reason not to stop according to her. I need soem actual physical side effects that can happen from cutting. I mean real medical scientific facts that can happen to you besides depression because that all comes w/ the bipolar thing.
If anyone knows a site where they could tell me things like this tell me. I mean does it make your amune system slow down? Does it cause loss of hair? What does it do physically? I need to tell her something bad that can happen from cutting besides she might cut deep. there has to be other things that can happen to you
and do not mention to me that it causes depression or suicide thoughts, that all comes from being bipolar too so I need to tell her what cutting can do to her besides 'maybe' and infection and 'she might' cut to deep
I am bipolar and I also used to cut. I still do occasionally, but I try not to. When I started, I never planned to stop. I didn't care about side effects such as infections or even death. When you are in that frame of mind, you can't think of anyhting except the relief you will get when that knife touches your skin. The thing that did make me stop, however, was seeing how much it hurt and destroyed my boyfriend. Though I cared nothing for myself, he was the world to me. Let her know how much you care for her and how much this is hurting you. Say it in a nonaccusatory way, or she will be put on the defensive. Just let her know that you will be there for her and it's ok. Other than that, I don't know what else to tell you.
My friend said that you should go to google.Com and enter "secret shame" once there go to the "friends and family" section. It is a forum for various links to a passel of ways to help. But above all remember that its all ultimately in her hands and its about her needing loving words and support.
Depending on how often she does it and how much it bleeds each time (have you ever seen the cut right after it's been inflicted or do you take her word for it?), you can bring up the possibility of minor anemia. It can cause brittle nails and pain in the nail bedding, unhealthy pale skin coloring (especially around the area around the cut; this can make the scar stand out even more), and cuts around the same area may bleed more than she intended (not because she's cutting any deeper, simply because it's going to take longer to clot), recovery will be slower and the scars may never completely go away. She may also develop cold intolerance.
I'm not sure how much good this really will do in her, but it's something other than cutting too deep or infection
Hi Brady I would also look into if she might have borderline personality disorder. I agree with everyone above about their comments on cutting, but I also know that cutting and self mutilation is also a symptom of borderline personality disorder. I would also ask if her morales/vales change from time to time? Does she love you one moment, then devalue you the next? Do stories change 180 degrees from one month to the next? These are just some additional questions I'd ask myself to see too if she's borderline. I know borderline personality disorder can occur with bipolar disorder. And you are a wonderful person for standing in her way! That's what a true friend does when one person is sinking is stand in the way! Also you value her beauty and you don't want her getting scared up! I hope this helps