Can anyone help me? I feel so alone now and I don't know who to turn too. The thoughts of wanting to kill myself are still very much here and I don't know if I should act on it or not. I have wanted to kill myself for the past few months and my attempts got me know where. This eating disorder has taken over my life and I really am beginning to wonder will I ever get my life back.
I go to therapy everyday and tonight I cancelled my appointed for tomorrow, I really regret that now because I really need to talk to someone, I need to know there is hope and that i'm not alone. I ate today and so I feel like my whole world is ending, I feel like I am out of control. All I want is to be thin and then everything will be ok well it will be better than I am now. I can't stand the way I look when I look in the mirror all I can see if fat and its getting to me so much, its ruining my life. All I want is to be thin and when I eat my life spins futher and futher out of control. Its getting hopeless, I am getting hopeless.
I am very scared about my life, I don't know how to live anymore. I know no one can help me here but I just needed to write and I am sure I will write a lot more because I am losing this battle.
If anyone is reading this and hasn't gone too far with their eating disorder I will plead with you, get help now its not too late but please don't let yourselves reach the point were I am at, please don't let yourselves get to a point where life doesn't seem worth living, believe me you won't like it. I want out now, I want to give up, I want to finally be free. I want to die!

Lostoyou( this name is so perfect, I am lost to my eating disorder)