I can't really understand your whole post, so I apologize. But I will try to answer with what I got.

Some women's female parts are very close together. My doctor explained to me that the average woman's bladder is (let's say, cause I don't really remember)1/4 inch from her cervix. Mine is only 1/8 inch.
So, everytime I have sex, I immediately have to pee because it rubs on my bladder. And it is so very, very easy to get bacteria pushed up into the bladder and this causes an infection. The one thing they tell you to do is make sure he is really clean before you have intercourse and to use condoms. But, since you are trying to conceive that wouldn't really work.
If I were you, I would pee right before you have sex, make him wash his privates (even his testicles as they will be rubbing up against you also), make sure you wipe really well and it wouldn't hurt to go ahead and clean yourself too. Then have sex. After he is done inside of you, lay there for at least 15 minutes trying to keep the sperm in you. Then go and pee again to get rid of any bacteria that he may have pushed inside of you.
There really isn't much more that you can do for this. It is just the way you are built. It sucks, but it's nature. Good luck hun.