Having Issues With Family And Holidays Posted: 11-05-03 11:15am
Hello,
here i'm battling over my family vs. His.
He always puts his family as most
important and mine as non-existant. I
cannot even make plans with mine casue it
seems every freakin' weekend his family is
coming to town for something!!!!!
How do I deal with this without starting
it to be a fight?
We're talking about christmas and my
family is to celebrate with us on boxing
day..Why?? Cause he'd like to visit his
parents for both christmas eve and
christmas day. I think the problem is
that my family has dwindled down to my mom
and uncle...And i'd like him to see that
even though my family is small, they are
just as important to take into
consideration.
Thanks
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 11-05-03 11:39am
Minerwater,
you really need to talk this over with him
and put your foot down. My sister goes
through the same thing, he puts his family
first before us and we get left behind.
And we were hurt and felt bad because we
wanted to spend time with them too. But
finally she made a decision that they need
to split the time. So we get christmas
eve and they get christmas day. With jose
its easy because he puts my family first
because his lives far away. But tell him
that the time needs to be split. If not
your family will be hurt that you chose
not to spend time with them
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minerwater
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Oct 2003 Posts: 153 Location: Canada
Posted: 11-05-03 11:42am
I just sent him an email that it's fair
that one day out of the two we get for my
family and christmas day they get it.
They are having dinner on christmas
day...They had no plans on eve except
having neighbours over for drinks.
I just know he'll be upset and yes, I will
have to put my foot down. And he said to
me how he doesn't put his family
first..But i'm always left behind.
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 11-05-03 13:48pm
Yeah put your foot down and tell him you
need to be fair. Its ok if he gets mad,
at least you can see your family too. I
have this website on Dr. Phil, its a
relationship health profile test. Try it
to see how your relationship is.
