Dont you have any close friends that are girls? Try getting a little closer with them and they will help you out,besides you wont be so nervous because you know them. But if you want to protect your ego, do what the last guy said, go to a safe,legal brothel and have fun-enjoy life as today may be the last

Well I wish to thank you guys for responding.

I'm 29 and nothing has change simply because I didn't get time to properly socialize with people because I have to run my company and a lot of other things and it's very stressful and time consuming.

But, i've decided if I don't find anyone by my 30th birthday, I will spend 3 days in las vegas at a luxury hotel in their penthouse suite, get some nice food, drinks and invite a very nice looking and clean professional to help me with my problem.

You see I really hoped that I wouldn't have to do this, but i'm getting more and more discouraged. Here's why:

everytime i'm in a company of friends, women and there's talk about sex and when someone mentions having sex with a virgin (for example the whole talk gets initiated when we start talking about 40yr old virgin movie). Almost every time girls react the same. They just wouldn't have sex with someone who doesn't know how to do it right. Of course people don't know that I am a virgin and i'm always dissapointed. I'm yet to meet a girl that doesn't care about that that much and doesn't care for being a teacher for while.

Not to mention the fact that if I told some girl that I am a virgin, they would most definitely look at me as some kind a psychological case.
I don't think that in today's society I would have time to explain why and how this came to be in my case. I would in 90% cases been ridiculed behind my back, because they would hide their reaction.

I mean, at 29, it looks freaky if a guy approaches girl and is not 100% ready to get into "sack".

I don't know maybe i'm socializing with wrong people, but it's very tough to make a change in my lifestyle and change my friends.

Thanks again for kind responses.

Hello,

i wanted to reply to this post because i'm in the same boat.

I'm 28, a virgin, thin as a toothpick, and insecure about my size.

To make matters worse I am going bald and my financial situation is crap.

So I figured what my solution would be is to:

a. Become financially stable by finding some avenue of interest that would be fun and profitable that every dog and his brother isn't already doing.

B. Using my funds to get a gym membership and utilize effective methods to grow my hair and my thing.

C. Start to enjoy life beacause I will now be a healthy, wealthy individual.

I know that these accomplishments will make me feel better about myself and dramatically improve my self esteem. I feel like every aspect of my life will improve greatly just for changing these few circumstances.

I have chosen to ignore the opinions and concerns of my family and friends because I think they should worry about themselves. I know they care about me and want me to be happy but these personal details about my life aren't easy to discuss with them. People feel sorry for me enough as it is.

I know what I want for myself and it makes me happy to know that I will get there someday.

All the best!

Their is nothing wrong with waiting as it can be very spooky out there with all of the std's, when the time is right you will know. If you feel overweight then go to a gym, plus it is a nice place to meet people.
The very best to you!

First of all, i'm a woman. Please get real and deal with who you are and what you want. I read your post and I dont even believe that you are a virgin. You gave any indication that you are using this as a dating service. Go to las vegas have a great time... Life is too short.. Just like ur dick.

you see, you are a typical type of woman that i'm dealing with day in and out. Unfortunately there's a lot of women like you that give a bad rap to really good and decent women out there.




What exactly did I say here that it looked like i'm using this board as a dating service, who did I want to date men in men section of the forum? I thought I had problems, but sometimes i'm glad that I didn't share my first experience with a editlike you. At least edit would never respond or insult me the way you did.




Instead of helping me understand what to do or give an advice, like most kind people responded, you chose to attack me. I think you should go to the nearest bar to fullfill your 12-inch penis desires since you're probably going through them like hot-cakes anyways. There's a word for that as well in the vocabulary.

What a edit



dont listen to her dude.

mudd,

i know how you feel. But let me tell you that having money means nothing. You will only have more problems and be even more dissapointed because you will start being surrounded with women who will look at you like a dollar bill and nothing else. It's very hard.



Of course, I don't want to insult some women here by putting them in the same group as certain gold-diggers, but I personally realized that everything that i've been doing in my life was wrong. Having some money and noone else to be happy with is the loneliest thing a man can experience. Everything that I was taught seems to be wrong. To be moral, to work and learn hard, to build yourself as an individual. I mean, these things are indeed important, but not as important as having a woman you love and who loves you for who you are and then building everything else. I missed out on most important things in life, having relationships, making love to someone and building myself emotionaly first and then everything else.



It seems that to be noticed these days, you have to be nice looking, very much in shape and to be cool. Being a kind and good guy, just doesn't cut it anymore. It seems that a large percentage of women looks for a bad boy who has "sexy" tattos, 6-pack...I realized that good guys do finish last. In my case, I guess i'm dull, not interesting.



I know you didn't want to hear that, but it's what i've observed. I might be wrong, I mean hey who the hell am i. I just wanted to tell you that having money only won't get you to that better mental place as you might've imagined it might get even worse in some cases.

For me, I think that just passing that self-confidence issue by having sex and becoming more experienced would make me feel totally different and a complete man. I just need to know that I did it, that I know how to do it right without being clumsy and insecure and I will be able to continue living my life fully. I'm pretty secure in everything else I do (it wouldn't get me where I am now if I wasn't), but as I said, with anything sex related, i'm more freightened from failure and being ridiculed then anything else.



I mean, everybody does it, how hard can it be. I achieved things that maybe 15-20% people actually manages to achieve in their life, and I can't do this simple thing. Pretty discouraging.

Hello again,

i wanted to say that I disagree about the money thing. First of all I wasn't implying that I would use it to attract women directly, just start by fixing the few things that would make me feel better about myself.

A few things I wanted to point out.

1. Don't let the cosmopolitan society and bar scene convince you that the bad boy image is the way to go - most of them are just as insecure with themselves in their own way and often attract women who are insecure with themselves as well.

2. What I believe to be important in life is to learn from your mistakes and be proud of your accomplishments. You say that you've achieved things only 15-20% of people have achieved? Great! At 29 years old that's awesome, at least be happy about that.

3. Tell your friends that you're a virgin. Doing this will show a lot of trust and your honesty will be appreciated. If they laugh and ridicule you for it then they are not your friends.

Not to sound like an "after school special" but it's time to move on from your past and look forward to the future. Be a little more positive in your daily activities and don't feed off the ignorance of others and the couple of people in this post. It's not too late to make a difference.

Well folks, read with gusto and clarity of vision the reply! Yes, my wife was a tad hard on the fella, because his letter (post) clearly indicated he was a fraud. You know there are such on the internet, do you not? I didn't agree so much with the last line about the (dick) but it was so funny and apropos if dude is a fraud, and by his reply to a slight barb, we now know his attitude towards women and his threshold of fairly dangerous anger. Just read the last line... Where did the kind, innocent, rather geeky virgin go? To be replaced by a vicious anger and a rotten attitude toward women? No wonder this guy has problems. And for all you decent people who try to help, god bless you for your caring but watch out for the wolf in sheep's clothing.

i'm not sure what I did to cause yours and your wife's despise since I really don't see how I can get anything else in this forum but some advice and maybe comfort since there's a lot of good men and women here.


I'm not sure what you're talking about really, I have no anger towards women or mental issues, I was just stating that most of the women I meet behave like mentioned above, but I did not say that all women are like that or that I hate them. It does seem that you have some issues from your posts however. You think that everyone is hiding something or is a phony. You should look into that and look for help seriously.

As far as my anger, it is solely pointed towards you and your wife since you are the first to attack and insult me. I sure am not going to stand and be sweet and nice towards you. I do have some self respect. I am a virgin, not an fool.

Guyphx: ignore them.

Braindead human couple: go away, your not welcome here.

now, now, fight nice...

Guyphx,

i am a 40 year old virgin, so I really know how you feel. I have many of the same issues you do, including the smallness factor. Unlike you, I measure in at 4.5" erect, so I have it even worse :)

i have suffered from depression most of my adult life, and am currently on meds for this (which aren't helping much). I have no self-confidence whatsoever, and I am completely convinced that I could never have any kind of relationship with a woman due to my size.



Perhaps these fears are irrational, but I just can't imagine that very many women would find a 40 year old virgin with a small dick all that great of a catch. At 28, I think you've still got time to turn things around - don't let yourself get to 40 like I did.

I have basically given up any hope of ever having any kind of relationship with a woman at this point in my life. I am resigned to the fact that I will spend the rest of my life as I have to this point - alone.

I can remember when I was 28 and a virgin, thinking how horrible that was. That was nothing compared to now. The last 12 years have gone by so fast that it's not even funny.

No matter what hollywood and "the 40 year old virgin" movie say, I can assure you that there's nothing funny whatsoever about being a 40 year old virgin. Far from being funny, it's downright depressing.



You still have time to turn things around for yourself. Please, learn from my experience (or lack thereof!) and don't let yourself end up a real 40 year old virgin. Do whatever it takes, or you may find yourself regretting it years later...



Best of luck!

Guyphx I know how you feel....




First of all, at 5.5 inches you are not huge but then you are not small either. So don't let that bother you.




What you should do is learn a lot about sex whichever way you can and watch some porn to get some ideas. Dont tell anyone that you are a virgin. Rather, after you have had sex, tell the girl then and she will be
surprised that you did such a great job despite being a virgin.

And to the couple that doubted you:

its one thing to accuse someone of being a fraud and another to insult them. That remark by your wife about "life being too short just like your penis" was in real bad taste. You are the one in need of help as you have to live with a editday in and day out.

Ok ive had my say...Good luck to you guyphx!

clearly indicated frad? Unless you are watching this guy 24/7 or are some kind of professional psycologyst, stfu please. Who are you to judge this guy when you dont know him? You say that hes clearly a fraud only cause your sticking up for your wife, not really to look at his side of the situation, because your not a virgin anymore. You dont know how he feels. Of course hes going to be angry when a woman responds like that, what your wife said would make anyone feel insecure and even more angry at women, hell, im pissed at her for saying that. His "rotten attitude" is only in your eyes because it was directed towards your wife. Hes wasnt holding a grudge, he was simply defending himself like any normal person would.

Guphx I wouldnt recomend givin up your virginity to a prostitute, but if you want the experience, go ahead. If you share it with somone you love the experience is supposed to be way better tho, but im sure you dont feel like waiting anymore. Some girls like sex with virgin guys but most girls dont for the fact that, since its their first time, the guy gets off really fast. I lost my virginity already soo I cant say I know how you feel the only thing I can compare it to is how frustrating it is when youve had sex and you dont have it for a while :-p. Whatever your choice is, I hope that one day you'll find somone that is understanding and loves you for who you are rather than whats in your pants. <---said meaning loves you for more than sex, not the size of your penis. 5.5 is about average size.

Hey am also in the same boat at the age of 24, and funny enough but I could have lost it tonight if I wanted to which is my reason for stumbling across this thread. I called around to my brothers place with my mother and his women's sister (annie) happened to be there who turned up out of the blue from london much to our surprise, I knew of her through sammy (sister) but this was the first time meeting so from what I heard before is that she would have the hots for me and it was only when I got home they texted me asking would I come back down for beers blah blah blah...But I didn't cos i've work tomorrow, so now I kinda felt I missed out on the chance, and how I know is cos when I texted her back saying I was putting up the tree she replied well you could be putting something else up lol. So now I feel I missed out, because I have to say this does get me down alot knowing am still a virgin, I can't help it but it does, now am a guy who's good looking, has a car, job oh and yes am a dj so I don't think no matter what you do or have increases your chances of losing your virginity (like these soo called punks getting every weekend) it comes down to where you came from meaning childhood of course that of mine as I didn't live my teenage years to the fullest due to shyness/quietness which made me feel left out. Presently I see myself as abit of a loner but still outgoing and just get on with it and go out the odd weekends and whatever happens happens. What really gets to me is girls playing the hard to get eventhough they would like ya in ways of looks or personality, fear of rejection is another thing aswell. But what am gonna do is use the dj'n as a stepping stone to be comfortable around people by starting to go looking for gigs or resident spots cos eventhough am a dj I don't feel confident in myself and people wouldn't think it just by the way I talk to them and just incase your wonder why I took it up well it was for the love of music really. I admit I worry fair bit about it but I think its all in the head too. I also thought of doing what "guy" said if panic stations set in but you people are rite you only lose it once and to think after that you lost it to someone you didn't even know or never will would be a big regret after holding out soo long.
I hope you know where am coming from?

Franko

Ladies and gentlemen, if you would please read this letter with gusto and clarity of vision...This reply.
Trying to pick up girls on this fine mens health forum with your fraudulent story. Preying on the abundant surplus of fine females that frequent this area, you wolf in sheeps clothing. Never knew there were such on the internet, did I not? No I didn't...



But
slight barbs aside
i just want to tell you in all honesty I really don't think that for men it matters who you lose your virginity too. The first time you do it it's just plain liberating, hell I didn't love her the first time in fact I knew her 7 days but you know what it was great. Seriously people overvalue losing something thats literally there to be lost. Your first time ain't special, you won't really remember it in some magical fairy tale way. I mean by the time your avg person dies they've had sex a thousand times, do you really think the first was more special then all the rest? Who can truly say that? I don't wanna seem crude but when you get right down to it thats just the way it is. Frankly losing your virginity to an incredible looking pro sounds like a great f*cken time. Hell you've got money treat yourself to a real life fantasy girl.
Just watch that low threshold of fairly dangerous anger and stop giving all these indications that you are using this as a dating service. Oodles and oodles of indications...I bet you didn't count on a couple of conspiracy theorist extraordinaires to come buy and blow the lid off your crazy penis-a-m-a-m-i-e scheme did you? No sir ya couldn't fool them, thats a sharp, astute couple your dealing with right there. Intelectual giants if you will.

omg, i'm 16 and you made me feel like I have the empire state building in my pants... Hehe, my g/f will be so happy... :d

Well I just wanted to thank everyone for kind responses (except for a few) and I wanted to let you know that I finally met with a girl that I was in love with a long time ago. Life was that way that we drifted away from each other since we were far away from each other, but finally after 5 years we saw each other recently and felt that the love was never gone.

There was no sex, but we steamed things a bit, because we were both trying to get to know each other again before getting to the next level. Now, she's gone but she will be visiting in a few months again to spend more time with me and it's most certain that we will have sex.


I'm having other problems at this point and I would like to hear from you guys. I knew this girl a long time ago very good, but now i've noticed that she's much more experienced (she's 27 btw), you could even say that she might be a sex addict. She told me that she loves sex very very much, she did almost everything possible including anal sex and told me somewhat about her relationships that happened during the time we didn't see each other.


This was an intimate conversation between us where she also asked me what I would like to do. She doesn't know that i'm still a virgin, however I think she suspects. I'm not willing to talk about it with her, but she's showed me that she is willing to show patience and allow time for us to really enjoy having sex with each other. I'm just not too happy to talk about this anyway and I just want to let it happen without much talk. It is strange that I feel very confident with her and not "afraid" if you can call it fear. I even showed initiative and did things that I thought I was afraid to do while we were intimate while she was visiting.


She's not here now, but I started having doubts about her past and if she told me everything about her previous affairs. I love this girl very much, but i'm afraid that she changed to a point where I would be shocked if I found out something else about her.


Some of the people she had relationships with I know, among which one guy was with her for a year and a half and the other guy I know was a one night thing. She told me she tried one night thing twice and that both times was horrible. Knowing this kills me, because I know that eventually I will see these 2 guys I know and I don't know how I will feel. Maybe she told me about this just because she maybe knew that I will most likely find out one day.


On the other hand, i'm afraid that she's a very sexual person and that she will sleep with someone else even though she expressed her feelings.


I guess i'm afraid that I don't know her anymore and if she's not what I feel, I will be crushed.


Can some of you guys who are more experienced in relationships give me your opinions about this. I can tell you more about her if you need to know. I'm just afraid that she changed to a point where she was telling me what I wanted to hear. Am I obsessing too much?

Btw, this girl is very far away from me and this would be a long distance relationship where I would see her probably every few months for a period of a month or so, for the next maybe 2-3 years while she finishes very tough university. What will happen after that I don't know.

If any girls are reading this, feel free to post your thoughts too.