I agree with fatfamily02, this was spiritual. Maybe the lord was letting you know that your child is ok. Once you have asked jesus to forgive you he removes your sin as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more. Now, you have to forgive yourself and trust that god is taking care of your child, (which was really his child all along) just like you are his child and he is able to take care of you as well.
As far as research on the effects of abortion, I would think that there is no way to accurately access, due to the long denial that most men and women experience, and then if they do deal with it it’s quietly and alone. And that’s too bad…
sounds like you received christ at some point in your life or he is pursuing you now… it is his laws that are stressing you; otherwise you would not feel a twinge of guilt, and it is his grace that is pursuing you.
Grace: unmerited love and favor.
Hebrews 10:16
"this is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds."
jeremiah 1:5
"before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."
john 1:17
for the law was given through moses; grace and truth came through jesus christ.
Acts 15:11
no! We believe it is through the grace of our lord jesus that we are saved, just as they are."
romans 5:20
the law was added so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more,
romans 6:14
for sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.
2 corinthians 12:9
but he said to me, "my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that christ's power may rest on me.
Galatians 2:21
i do not set aside the grace of god, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, christ died for nothing!"
galatians 5:4
you who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from christ; you have fallen away from grace.
Ephesians 2:5
made us alive with christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved.
Ephesians 2:8
for it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of god—
acts 2:17
" 'in the last days, god says, I will pour out my spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams.
Titus 3:7
so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.
Romans 3:23
for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of god,
acts 13:38
"therefore, my brothers, I want you to know that through jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you.
Romans 7:25 24what a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25thanks be to god—through jesus christ our lord!
So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to god's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.
2 corinthians 9:15
thanks be to god for his indescribable gift!
Philippians 1:3
[ thanksgiving and prayer ] I thank my god every time I remember you.