Joined: 29 Oct 2003 Posts: 2 Location: Grand Haven, MI
Lying to the Family And Doctors Posted: 10-29-03 13:30pm
my
husband is lying to his family (mother)
about his epilepsy. I don't know what to
do. He has been seizier free for almost
two years now but is tellling his family
and his doctors otherwise so he doesn't
have to go to work.
He is getting ssi . I am angry about
this. But don't know what to do. His
mother is an enabler. She is mentally
unstable herself. She wants him to have
seizers. So he has to be dependent on her
and i.
Help!!!!!
Deb
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AdamsMom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Texas
Lying Posted: 10-29-03 22:38pm
Is your husband on any medication ? If so
is the reason for him being seizure
free?
My son is seizure free for 3 years but he
is on depokote
well atleast he was till he took hisself
off 3 weeks ago. And his doctor has
scheduled him for a eeg in november. I
called his doctor and told him he took
hisself off med and needed a appointment
to reevaluate him.
So my next ? Is , does his doctor ever
run test on him , eeg , blood levels
took?
If not why?
I would call his doctor and tell him he
has been seizure free for 2 years unless
its because he is taking meds that is
controlling his seizures.
Hope this helps
adamsmom
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dr457
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 29 Oct 2003 Posts: 2 Location: Grand Haven, MI
Lying Posted: 10-31-03 09:57am
He is on depakote. Anytime the doctors
want to run any test he avoids them
by missing the appointments ect. What I
don't understand is why he tells his
mother that he still having trouble when
he's not.
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AdamsMom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Texas
Lying Posted: 10-31-03 11:35am
Well sounds like to me the doctor needs to
insist on tests or stop giving him
perscription for depokote untill tests are
ran.
Depokote can cause liver damage that is
one of the reasons for blood levels to be
took every 6 months.
Also to find out if he has enough med in
system to keep the seizures at bay. Which
seems to be the case here.
I dont understand why the doctor does not
insist on bloodwork especially since there
is a risk of liver damage.
You should tell your husband about the
liver damage and then maybe he will get
test ran.
Has he been told he by doctor he could
outgrow the seizures and in order to find
that out is to take him off his meds every
yr or 2 to see if he has a seizure?
That is the case with my son .
He is told he could outgrow the seizures
and so its time again to take him off meds
to see.
Your husband sounds like he is scared of
having another seizure.
You both need to have a conference visit
with the doctor and discuss his case in
full
you say his mom freaks out about
everything , maybe he is just feeding her
all the lies for attention.
Good luck
let me hear from you again ,
adamsmom
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LMSakaTHX
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 12 Nov 2003 Posts: 3 Location: Tucson, AZ
Lying Posted: 11-12-03 16:44pm
Honestly I would tell his family and
doctor the truth. If he has been seizure
free for 2 years there is no reason why he
can't work. He is getting ssi when he
doesn't even need it and I think that is
wrong because there are people out there
that do need it and are not getting it.
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AdamsMom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Texas
Lying to Family Posted: 11-12-03 16:56pm
I believe you should first tell your
husband you are calling his doctor and
that you are requesting a conference with
the 3 of you for the reason your husband
has been seizure free .
I would let your husband tell his family
.
You dont want them ganging up on you for
telling them.
Good luck
adamsmom
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eugene dargenio
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 1 Location: madison, wi
Lying Posted: 11-14-03 05:27am
it is too bad your
husband seems as if he gave up. I ve had
epilepsy since 4, I was almost to that
point but luckily, I got out of it. He
needs to get some self respect and stop
feeling sorry for himself. You can only
help by supporting him, don't give up.
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phil dennison
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 71 Location: illinois
Posted: 11-14-03 20:26pm
In life a taker never wins keep this to
yourself his epilepsy will return devorice
this man.
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AdamsMom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Texas
Lying to Family Posted: 11-16-03 13:24pm
What kind of advice is that to divorce .
That is no solution.
A marriage does not have to end just
because of a illness.
Her husband needs medical help and
counseling.
Please talk with your pastor about this ,
if you love your husband , you will get
thru this
blessings
adamsmom
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phil dennison
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 71 Location: illinois
Posted: 11-16-03 15:33pm
Hello pasture,i called you today because I
over slept for church.I don't work and i'm
getting free money.I get money for
epilepsy I don't have.My wife thinks I
should go to work.Why go to work ,if I get
the money for free.I didn't hear you
pasture,what?"your purpose of life,is to
give not recive.Your epilepsy will come
back if you don't give."what do you think
i'm lazy or something!!I'm finding a new
church!!
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AdamsMom
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Oct 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Texas
Lying to Family Posted: 11-16-03 23:48pm
Uuhhmmm!!!!
If you had read all the post you would
know her husband has epilepsy and his
seizures are under control because he is
on medication.
He is just letting his family think and
his doctor that he is still having
seizures so he can collect a check.
Are you a christian ?
If so im confused about your remarks.
Adamsmom
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phil dennison
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 71 Location: illinois
Dear Adamsmom Posted: 11-17-03 18:26pm
"adamsmom"my epilepsy doctor belived
people were seeing him just to get free
money. So I felt "what should I do" I
asked him. He said to go to st.Louis
barns hospital. Stay for a week and take
testing. So I did. They said " you are
epilepitic and we think you should have
brain surgery" so I did. During the
surgery, there was a bright light. I knew
what it was. And I did not want to go.
Why? Because I wanted to take care of my
daughter. I know now the purpose of life.
It is to give to people.If I went to
surgey for me, me, me I would have not
recovered. I am epilepsy free, and take
no medicine. I talk to god every day, and
I joined a chuch and I never have missed.
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Miss Ruby
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Nov 2003 Posts: 2 Location: UK
Lying to Family And Doctors.... Posted: 11-18-03 05:10am
Hi dr457,
i read your post with interest. I too
have epilepsy and cant work full time
because of it.
What i'm wondering is this; do you think
that your husband could be behaving this
way because he is scared of going back to
work? Many people with this condition
feel that way. They get worried that the
stress of being in the work place again
might trigger an attack. The thought of
having to deal with a sz in front of work
mates is scary beond belief!
Just because he has been clear of e for
while dosn't necessarily mean that your
husband has been cured of it, as i'm sure
you are well aware.
Try getting him to his doctor by all
means, but in a subtle way, as if it's his
idea to go kind of thing. What i'm
trying to say is try not to pressurize
him. Sorry i'm sounding bossy, I didn't
mean it to come out that way.
It can be a really daunting experiance,
going back to work after being away for so
long, for the best of us,but if there is
that added problem to overcome as well,
namely epilepsy, the fear becomes massive.
Lying to his family and doctors could be a
part of the same problem as not wanting to
go back to work. Have you ever thought
that by saying, "i'm ok now" he might
think he will be tempting fate to knock
him down with a sz?
That kind of thought is a very common one.
Epilepsy leaves a lot of us, if not all,
feeling very insecure. No matter how we
portray ourselves to others as confident
on the outside, quite often on the inside
we are trembling wrecks. That's the thing
about e you can't see it, but it dosn't
mean it's not there.
I truly hope your life gets better, you
have a lot to deal with, I can see that
from the way you write.
Love and best wishes to you all,
miss ruby.Xx
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phil dennison
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 14 Nov 2003 Posts: 71 Location: illinois
Miss Lazy Posted: 11-18-03 19:55pm
Miss ruby you have epilepsy and you can
work full time so go to work lazy.
my
husband is lying to his family (mother)
about his epilepsy. I don't know what to
do. He has been seizier free for almost
two years now but is tellling his family
and his doctors otherwise so he doesn't
have to go to work.
it is too bad your
husband seems as if he gave up. I ve had
epilepsy since 4, I was almost to that
point but luckily, I got out of it. He
needs to get some self respect and stop
feeling sorry for himself. You can only
help by supporting him, don't give up.