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Q: 13 And Pregant
asked by: haileegirl on January 24th, 2005
New User
Im 13 and im pregan! Me and my best friend both are and we kept a secret from our moms until last week our moms didnt approve but my mom has been supportive but she said my boyfriend has 2 pay for sum of the things I will need! Well ne ways me and my best friend cant wait and we are so close in friends that if we have to same sex were going to name them the same because we have the same name,but now my mom is so pissed that I got pregant in the first place,now she wants me 2 get an obortion I dont belive in obortions so then she said adoption and I said no then she totally said she wasnt going to be apart of the babys life or mine and I need to move sumwhere else so now im moving in with my boyfriend! Is that a bad choice?
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BrianBaby
replied on January 24th, 2005
Extremely eHealthy
Rough situation sweety....I don't know what to tell you.....Talk about it with your mom and ask her why she changed her mind about it.
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Kourtney08
replied on January 24th, 2005
Active User, very eHealthy
Wow, im sorry thats happend, but it's your choice what you want to do, and if you don't want to give the baby up for adoption, or get an abortion then you don't have to. Maybe your mom will come around, I sure hope so because she may be upset but that baby is her grandchild, and that little boy, or girl deserves to be loved by her grandmother whether she was unplanned or not. Also you need to start going to doctors appoinments to keep yourself healthy, they'll give you prenatel vitamins that help with your babys growth, etc. You're only 13 so you have a lot on your plate. Im 19 with a 2 and a half month old little girl, and I have a lot on my plate. You're 13 so you probably can't get a job, but you need to do everything you can to take care of your child. Good luck. :)
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littlered
replied on January 24th, 2005
Experienced User
Sorry that your mom is making you live somewhere else. You do need to trying to talk to her. She could be just upset that her baby is having a baby. But it is your choice to whether or not give the baby up for adoption. I think that if you are older enough to have sex (which at 13 your not but I ain't telling you what to do) then you are older enough to take care of a baby if that is your choice. But there is other people who don't think that. Had your mom every asked you if you was sex or talked to you about . That could be why she is upset or mad. She maybe mad at herself instead of you. I hope this help you any.
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sftbllchika06
replied on January 24th, 2005
Experienced User
I think you should think or atleast look into adoption because you are only 13. I am 17 and I am even considering adoption because I have looked into how much it will cost and believe me it is a lot. Just make sure you and the baby's father have talked this out. And you can take care of yourselves and this tiny baby.
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Kourtney08
replied on January 24th, 2005
Active User, very eHealthy
Yeah, im 19 with a 2 and a half month old, I stay home with her, and her dad (whos still in the picture) works, and its hard for us. So I can just imagine what it would be like for a 13 year old whose still under her moms care.
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SamiNSunisMa
replied on January 25th, 2005
Extremely eHealthy
Ok, ive been there, I got pregnant with sami when I was 13, first thing to do is go to treatment if you are using alcohol or drugs.
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linuxChique
replied on January 27th, 2005
Extremely eHealthy
Wait it out before you move out! There's a really good chance that your mom will get used to the idea and get excited about being a grandmother. I'd wait a couple of months, maybe even until the baby's born. Good luck!
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prettybabie
replied on January 28th, 2005
New User
Re: 13 And Pregant
That sucks hun that you're pregnant at 13! I hope everything works out for you and your boyfriend! I'm sure your mom will come around because she cant leave a 13 year old girl to raise a child with her boyfriend! I would highly suggest that you go to the doctors regularly to make sure the baby is okay! Good luck with the pregnancy and your mom!
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steen
replied on January 28th, 2005
Extremely eHealthy
The main problem facing you is that only around 4% of pregnant teens graduate highschool. That means that only one girl out of every 25 will actually graduate. As such, you need all the help you can get, including your family just to make it through the pregnancy, so try to make it work.

Likewise, you need to at least give some serious thought to adoption, as you will have a rough time ahead as a teen mom. Even if your bf sticks around (i don't know his age, but the young ones have this habit of making themselves scarce after a few sleepless nights with a new baby), raising a kid when you are 13-14 years old is incredibly tough. No sleep, no money lots of stress, lots of having to take the kid to various doctors appointments even if it is healthy (and it gets much, much worse if it has some kind of illness). So you must have several people you can lean on for support if you don't want this to turn into an exhausting disaster, or else consider adoption rather seriously.

But if you feel up to it and are ready, just gather as many friends as you can and get ready for it. Parenthood is hard, but it certainly is possible to do. After all, most women manage it, even if most start a bit later than 13. Just be sure to gather strength. No smoking, no alcohol or drugs, lots of exercise. Labor is hard, and worse if you are not fit. But women generally report the result worth it :)
so please become a bit of a health freak right now, and it will be a lot easier in 7-9 months.
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mommaashley
replied on January 28th, 2005
Experienced User
Im sorry to hear that, but your mom (because you are only 13) as far as I know cannot abandon you. You are still under her care until you are 18 and she is responsible for you and your well being
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