ive been with my boyfriend for a year and 1/2 and I have never had an orgasm..I use to fake it until I told him about a month ago...Being I cant get off I am horney all the time...And he gets frustrated with me...And it upsets me. He says just go masturbate with your massager...But then I feel lonley...I dont know..What should I do? Please help! Thanks
You have probably grown so used to the feel of masturbation that partner sex is just too different and your brain gets confused by the different sensory feelings and you get nervous and that shuts off your orgasmic reflex.
This happens to men very frequently, especially guys who masturbate alot and are heavily into porn. The body/brain gets to prefer masturbation over intercourse and they either can't get, or lose their hard-ons when having intercourse or, in some cases they can get hard but can't ejaculate inside the girl.
So you have a female version of this. The thing to do is to try with your boyfriend to duplicate what you do when alone. Bring the massager along next time you are with him and show him how to use it on you. Once you have had an orgasm with him doing this you can then move on to other things with more confidence.
You might even buy a "pocket rocket" a mini battery operated vibrator which you can use on yourself while he is inside you.
Try a small drop of what is called "viva cream." it feels amazing, kind of like menthol. It's also a lot of fun. I am addicted to my vibrators too, so I try not to use them more than a couple times a month, and b.O.B. (battery operated boyfriend) is my only partner right now!!! Imagine how difficult that is.
Anyway, my advice is try the cream with your partner. My guess is that you get off clitorally rather than vaginally. If you don't know, then you have the fun task of playing with him until you find out. Some women are able to get off both ways, but from what I understan, it's pretty rare.
At any rate, keep us all posted.
try watching porn for some new ideas. You can either watch it together, or alone.
My advice is to stop worrying so much about having an orgasm. If you are preoccupied with that, you will never be able to have one with ur bf. Just enjoy it for what it is, and don't worry about the orgasm. You'll be surprised one day and it will just happen And then they will come easier...
Also, you might want to lay off the vibrator bc like someone else said, your body may be getting too used to that
generally speaking, i don't like solutions to problems that involve having the woman masturbate less. ha! what i prefer is to have the woman bring her toys into the lovemaking session and make them a part of it.
the penis was not made to touch the woman in such a way that she would be guaranteed to have an orgasm...therefore I believe that God gave mankind the intelligence to develop and manufacture toys!
you can implement toys easily into your lovemaking. even during penetration, take a little pocket rocket or an "egg" vibe and go for it.