Its called masterbation...Guys do it, its healthy...And you have to remember sex isnt love. In my opinion at least, let him masterbate to hot woemn its fine, he sees him gets off, and the other 23 hours and 59 minutes are yours. And hes most likely thinking about u.

Your mom is right.He will not ever stop looking at women.That is not a bad thing,how you respond to it can be.I know my husband looks at other women,but he is at home with me at night and I am the one he is with.Being young and not as confident as you will be in a few years,you will learn to laugh off things like this.On the other hand,if your guy is using porn as a substitute for real intimacy with you,that is a real problem and one you cannot handle on your own.Remember,those models have been enhanced by airbrushing,professional make-up and hair people plus a little cosmetic surgery thrown in for good measure.They are paid to represent a fantasy most of us do not measure up to.Sure,they look great,but can they do what you do??Do they work,go to school and run a household by themselves???Don't try to measure yourself against them,it will only make your self esteem plummet.Instead,find one good thing about yourself and build on that.You have many good qualities,just focus on them!!!
Patty

Contrary to what your mom and some other people believe, there are some men who do not look at pornography (and aren't gay either), there are also those who have at one time looked at pornography and have stopped and been able to not look at it again. The human soul is stronger than any sexual organ.


If he loves you, and understands how it affects you, he will make an effort. If it is that important to him, he will stop. Unless he believes that it is impossible to stop. But if a mother can lift a burning truck off her child to save him because it's important to her, he can stop looking at porn if he understands it's that important to you.


Here's the thing: relationships are never 50/50, they are 100/100. Each person gives all of themself to care for and meet the needs of the other person. Each person has boundaries which are areas where they can't give of them selves all the time or to a great extent. That is healthy and necessary. And part of loving the other people with 100%, not 50% is knowing where their boundaries are and not crossing them or asking them to.

You boundary is that you don't want him to look at porn. *you* want to be what he desires and is captivated by. Sex and sexuality seem very important and sacred to you. If he respects you and loves you (as in cares about you as a person and companion, not just an attraction) he will make this a priority, and I can tell you from experience, it is possible for him to stop and not even desire it any more. Anyone else who says different has been burned and is cycnical. That is unfortunate for them, but don't let that be the only opinion you have. There are always other options and choices and possibilities.


Talk it through with him. Let him know how important it is to you. If he seems unable or incapable, you know that you may not be his first priority.


I can say that for people who are very involved in looking at porn, it can be a difficult and intimidating thing to consider stopping. Some people may feel like it is impossible (by the way, not only guys have issues with looking at porn, there are many women who have a problem with it too). Some people don't think looking at porn is bad, but I think just by the way that you and thousands of other people are negatively affected in relationships because of it says there's something more to it than just a hobby.


Anyway, those are my thoughts to encourage you to have hope and be strong and set your boundaries.

for someone who wants a genuine relationship and wants to know that the person truly desires them and wants them, "most likely" almost all of the time he's thinking about you... That's just not good enough. Some people say that's reality. I say that's a sad acceptance of way less than second best.

Like I said, I can tell you from experience it is possible to have a man who does not desire porn, who once looked at it and stopped and does desire you more. I'm not saying it's not a struggle. I don't deny there are plenty of women who are more beautiful than I am, thinner than I am, blah blah blah the list goes on. But he *chooses* to love me, and me alone.

It is possible. Don't settle for crap. Stick with him and encourage him, but don't give in to hopelessness. And if he can't respect your boundaries in your relationship then move on.