As an update to my previous repsonse...ive' stayed with my boyfriend since I last wrote three months ago. It's been 5 months and he's been nothing but wonderful, never a sign of an episode, being mean, nothing. He just gets a little short tempered for a second which he knows to work on and I've noticed his O.C.D., he's very organized and likes things the way he likes them. We joke about it, and luckily for him I'm a little anal myself with some things. All in all, I can say I'm so happy and his bipolar condition hasn't been a problem. I'm wondering if this is a normal situation? He takes his medication reguarly, doesn't have mood swings liike other peopole have mentioned on this site and has tons of friends. Is there anyone else who has a bipolar boyfriend who is so under control like this? It's like he doesnt even have it. Can it go away? He's turned out to be the best guy I've ver been with. He's been very affectionate and does like to hang out all the time, but it doesnt feel clingy. I want to hang out with him all the time . Someone please give me some advice on his normalcy and if I should be thankful or scared that one day he will burst?

Has anyone else noticed how many of these posts sound as if we've become nurses? I was with my BP boyfriend for 5 months but had a very close friendship for a year before we started dating. I feel like a bipolar expert. I've read all the books, constantly research online, know all the current treatments, have gone with him to the doctors, helped him switch to better meds (first he was on no meds at all). I have "coached" him on how to deal with day to day stress when his mind is always pulling him in negative directions. I thought if I could help him to be as healthy as he could be he could finally be happy and feel safe and secure.
He would tell me all the time that I was the best thing for him. That I helped him more than anyone ever had before and I made him feel safe and loved. So now after all this time he finally has the confidence and stability to move on and start his new relationship with a woman he is more physically attracted to. Evidentally he has learned a lot about being a better boyfriend because things seem to be going very well.
I'm such an ass. I've not only lost my boyfriend but my very best friend and have never felt so betrayed.
I should have seen it all coming because I've never read a bipolar relationship story with a happy ending. I believe his new girlfriend is a decent (and must be patient) woman and I'm sure it's just a matter of time before he breaks her heart too. I'm sure that will be after he slowly makes her feel fat and ugly and unattractive.
But here I am still "reading up", trying to find someones happy ending to see if I can ever have hope of getting back to our happy times. I'm an intelligent and decently attractive woman who has so much to offer. I never thought I'd act like such a looser.
I think his mental illness has messed up my mind and I'm thankful that I've had enough strength to break off all communication with him. He says he misses me so much and needs our friendship. "I'm the only one who ever really understood and accepted his whole self". Not knowing what he's doing or how he is has been like loosing a piece of myself. I need to find my sanity again and remember that I love myself and deserve to be loved by someone who I can count on and who will treat me with respect. Please pray for me.

I know how you feel . I am a GF of someone that is bipolar . I have been through the proscutory accusations of him thinking i am cheating on him with his own nephew bit . I have not but that all goes with the territory it seems with the mood swings . I have been with him since May of 07 . I guess now i am not there with as much on a daily basis
i miss a lot of that . You see we met online and i travel there too see him . We live 4 hours apart and hope to be together in the fall of 2009 . I see a lot of things that you have mentioned with your partner .

Best Things to Say
...to a person with bipolar disorder
Supporting Someone with Bipolar - For Family and Friends
Clichés and platitudes usually aren't much help to someone who is depressed. Being depressed is not the same thing as just being sad about something. This list, compiled from a Usenet group, offers some useful statements you can make to a friend or loved one who is depressed.
It is most tempting, when you find out someone is depressed, to attempt to immediately fix the problem. However, until the depressed person has given you permission to be their therapist, (as a friend or professional), the following responses are more likely to help. Acknowledge the depression for what it is, and give permission for them to feel depressed.
"I love you"
"I care"
"You're not alone in this"
"I'm not going to leave/abandon you"
"Do you want a hug?"
"You are important to me"
"If you need a friend..."
"It will pass, we can ride it out together"
"When all this is over, I'll still be here"
"You have so many extraordinary gifts - how can you expect to live an ordinary life?"
"I'm sorry you're in so much pain. I am not going to leave you. I am going to take care of myself so you don't need to worry that your pain might hurt me"
"I listen to you talk about it, and I can't imagine what it's like for you. I just can't imagine how hard it must be"
"I can't really fully understand what you are feeling, but I can offer my compassion"
"I'm sorry you're having to go through this. I care about you and care that you are hurting"
"I'll be your friend no matter what"
"I cannot understand the pain you're in, I cannot feel it. But hold onto my hand while you walk through this storm, and I'll do my very best to keep you from slipping away"
"I'm never going to say, 'I know how you feel' unless I truly do, but if I can do anything to help, I will"







Worst Things to Say
...to a person with bipolar disorder
Supporting Someone with Bipolar - For Family and Friends
Some people trivialize depression (often unintentionally) by dropping a platitude on a depressed person as if that is the one thing they needed to hear. While some of these thoughts have been helpful to some people (for example, some people find that praying is very helpful), the context in which they are often said mitigates any intended benefit to the hearer. Platitudes don't cure depression.
"What's your problem?"
Will you stop that constant whining?"
What makes you think that anyone cares?"
"Have you gotten tired yet of all this me-me-me stuff?"
"You just need to give yourself a kick in the rear"
"But it's all in your mind"
"I thought you were stronger than that"
"No one ever said life was fair"
"Pull yourself up by your bootstraps"
"Why don't you just grow up?"
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself"
"There are a lot of people worse off than you"
"You have it so good - why aren't you happy?"
"What do you have to be depressed about?"
"You think you've got problems..."
"Well at least it's not that bad"
"Lighten up"
"You should get off all those pills"
"You are what you think"
"Cheer up"
"You're always feeling sorry for yourself"
"Why can't you just be normal?"
"You need to get out more"
"Get a grip"
"Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be"
"Get a job"
"You don't 'look' depressed"
"You're just looking for attention"
"Everybody has a bad day now and then"
"Why don't you smile more?"
"A person your age should be having the time of their life"
"The only one you're hurting is yourself"
"You can do anything you want if you just set your mind to it"
"Depression is a symptom of your sin against God"
"You brought this on yourself"
"Get off your rear and do something"
"Snap out of it"
"You're always worried about your problems"
"Just don't think about it"
"Go out and have some fun"
"Just try a little harder"
"I know how you feel - I was depressed once for several days"
"You'd feel better if you went to church"
"caca or get off the pot"
"What you need is some real tragedy in your life to give you perspective"
"This too shall pass"
"Go out and get some fresh air"
"We all have our cross to bear"
"You don't like feeling that way? So change it"
"You're a real downer to be around"
"You are embarrassing me"
"You'd feel better if you lost some weight"
"You're too hard on yourself. Quit being such a perfectionist"
"Don't take it out on everyone else around you"
"You are going to lose a lot of friends if you don't snap out of this"
"You're dragging me down with you"
"You're just being immature"
"You are your own worst enemy"
"That is life - get used to it"
"My life isn't fun either"
"You don't care about the rest of us - you're so self-absorbed"

i have seen these tips thanks for sharing

I just want to say: "ME TOO". I just got a bunch of info that i didn't know from one of my best friends about bipolar disorder today, apparently her brother is bipolar and she knows a lot about it.

I called her up today extremely sad because my boyfriend (was diagnosed last winter) struck me in frustration yesterday. I have never had anyone lash out at me physically before. I'm totally not the one for rough-housing and didn't take it lightly.

The one thing that bothers me the most is that he always has this look in his eyes like he didn't do anything wrong. And when he has upset me in some way by not being thoughtful or whatever, he acts like everything is normal and that he is not capable of wrong-doing, this makes me feel even worse!

I've been dating my boyfriend for 4 months now. I had a chance to talk with him today about yesterday and he told me that yesterday he was manic. He always tells me that under no circumstances is he to be stressed out in anyway. If he is, he said he will shut out the world and not talk to me for months.

What I would like to know is :are my boyfriend's stages of manic-depression going to worsen overtime if he chooses not to take medication? He told me that he used to do drugs and now he's clean. But, even though he's not an alcoholic, I feel threatened by his dependency on having a beer at the end of everyday of the week.

Thank you for taking the time to read and reply
Cutefroglet

After reading these posts it has helped me cope with my living situation and the emotional rollercoaster I've been riding. My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year and moved in together 2 months ago. We are very close and he was open with me from the get go about his bipolar disorder. I'm the nurturing type and pretty level headed so I accepted it and did what I could to educate mysef on BPD.
He takes his medication consistently and visits his therapist regularly. He's had one suicide attempt several years before I knew him but has come a long way since then. The first half of our relationship was great, full of excitement, dates and we never argued. Once he stated getting comfortable with me, small instances of him accusing me of petty things started to occur, but I dealt with them and brushed them off. We've had some arguements but it always seems as though the arguement gets twisted and turned around on me. He is somewhat manipulative and has a way of turning things around to be my fault and I always end up appologizing, even if I'm not in the wrong, just to end the arguement. He takes sarcastic tones with me and if I want to talk out an issue we're having he tells me that I "Like" to fight. I'm about to my wits end. I never have the right thing to say and he puts me down and calls me dumb, stupid, says I'm being childish. When I ask him if he even likes me, since I'm doubtful at times because how he treats me, he tells me if he didn't like me he'd tell me and leave at a drop of a dime. Since the move-in, we've had several blow up fights and lastnight was the final straw.
He was sick at home with the flu and I went to run errands. I let him know that was what I was doing and to call me if he needed anything. He never called so I assumed he was sleeping it off. On my way home a girlfriend called and wanted to know if I woudl meet her for a drink and a quick dinner at restaurant close by my house. I agreed to meet her. I texted him letting him know my whereabouts and what do you know... I was labeled a LIAR! Ugh, soooo, I got home and everything happened so quick. He said I knew before I left to run errands that I was meeting up with my friend but was hiding it from him. I MET MY GIRLFRIEND, NOT SOME DUDE, I mean, come on... things escalated and he tried to leave to go to his parents house. I tried to stop him so we could talk and he threatened to call the cops on me. Then, he grabbed me and threw me on the bed. I ended up letting him leave and he took our dog and left for his mom's.
I was sitting at home in shock that this escalted so quick and was started second guessing myself and thinking I screwed up again... but all I did was meet up with a girlfriend and failed to notify him before I left the house. Some things come up spur of the moment right? Since I'm second guessing myself, can someone reassure me that I'm not in the wrong or that I did indeed screw up. It seemed to me like another manic episode filled with anger. He was clenching his teeth and getting in my face telling me to get out of his way to leave. I just can't handle that kind of treatment. When we spoke on the phone today, he acted like everything was cool and when I brought up lastnight, and told him that it wasn't right to put his hands on me, instead of saying sorry, he told me that I shouldn't have put my hands on him. I explained I was trying to get him to calm down so we could talk it out instead of having a yelling match but he stuck by his guns. He acts like he does no wrong and I still haven't gotten a sorry out of him.
Our lease is up in 4 months and I'm seriously considering moving out and ending this. I love him dearly like everyone else comments, but I have to put myself first. If I'm not in the right state of mind, how can I help him be in one? When it's good, it's real good, but when it's bad, it's real bad. It's hard and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this episode will go away soon. I'm thinkig about asking him if I can sit in on his next therapist appointment so he can hear it from him that the way he acts isn't right.
I'm going to try to hang in there, but after hearing all these posts, I'm not sure if there ever is a happy bipolar/normal ending like I dream about us having. Any advise would help me at this point, I'm desperate.

I am a female with Bipolar I and I use to be married for 10 years before my ex cheated on me. I am re-married and have been with my husband 5 years now. I went the first 10 years off of medication. The last 5 years I have been on medication. I see a doctor, but I am not getting counseling as of right now and I do fine. I don't have ups or downs any more. But I am unmotivated I don't work, I am on disability.

I have been going out with my boyfriend for about 2 months now but only 2 weeks ago i was told by him he had bipolar,i didnt quite understand. over the last few days ive found out he has been texting other women,i confronted him and he said he did it not to hurt me and so i would split with him.so i agreed but then he told me he loved me and that he wanted to be with me.
It is so very hard,i want him,he wants me but when he goes off on one i dont know what to do.
does it sound like he is going through a mania stage?
he doesnt take meds so i want to confront him and ask why.
i love him and dont want to leave,but im in dispair!
how can i get him to take meds without him going off on an episode?!
=[

I've been with my bf for almost a year now...and I am 8 months pregnant by him as well. After a pretty severe manaic episode he went to the doctor again and started meds for me and his baby. But he doesnt take them regularly and he sleeps all the time now. I feel like I have to do everything around the house because he is never awake. And he barely talks to me anymore. I am so alone lately due to this. Anyone else have this problem? He is on 6mgs of Invega btw. thanks.

bipolar disorder is a crazy thing...

and honestly.. you can't feel responsible for the other person.. and you can't fix them either. It's a disorder.. and unless they are taking medication and getting counselling on a regular basis.. then it's very difficult to deal with someone and especially have a relationship with someone with bipolar. I just ended my 1 year relationship with my bipolar boyfriend 2 nights ago... we've still been talking.. and he knows the fault lies with him and his insane mood swings.

He was constantly negative.. jealous, angry, and always accusing me of being decietful or cheating on him. The other day he said he'd give me a massage.. so I got out some baby oil, and he said "why baby oil? we never use baby oil" and I said, "I don't know.. I just like the smell" and he insisted this made NO sense and that I must have been getting massages from other guys.. and went off on this huge rant and wouldn't talk to me for about an hour.

Most of the time I never knew if he actually thought the things he did.. or if it was just another episode.. but when it was all done and over with.. and I was in tears.. he acted as if "oh well, it's not my fault, I can't help it"

But no one should have to feel that way in a relationship.. whether the person can use their disorder as an excuse to mean and hurtful or not.. it isn't right.. and it isn't healthy.

I've been struggling with ending my relationship for a long time.. and now I have.. and it's still so difficult.. because I love him so much.. and I just wish things were different.

He needs to be on medication.. and he needs to have counselling.. he needs to become right with himself before he can even think about trying to be in a healthy relationship with anyone else.. and if any of you are with someone who has bipolar.. and who isn't recieving any kind of professional help.. then that's the first thing I would suggest you ask them to do..

bipolar disorder is a crazy thing...

and honestly.. you can't feel responsible for the other person.. and you can't fix them either. It's a disorder.. and unless they are taking medication and getting counselling on a regular basis.. then it's very difficult to deal with someone and especially have a relationship with someone with bipolar. I just ended my 1 year relationship with my bipolar boyfriend 2 nights ago... we've still been talking.. and he knows the fault lies with him and his insane mood swings.

He was constantly negative.. jealous, angry, and always accusing me of being decietful or cheating on him. The other day he said he'd give me a massage.. so I got out some baby oil, and he said "why baby oil? we never use baby oil" and I said, "I don't know.. I just like the smell" and he insisted this made NO sense and that I must have been getting massages from other guys.. and went off on this huge rant and wouldn't talk to me for about an hour.

Most of the time I never knew if he actually thought the things he did.. or if it was just another episode.. but when it was all done and over with.. and I was in tears.. he acted as if "oh well, it's not my fault, I can't help it"

But no one should have to feel that way in a relationship.. whether the person can use their disorder as an excuse to mean and hurtful or not.. it isn't right.. and it isn't healthy.

I've been struggling with ending my relationship for a long time.. and now I have.. and it's still so difficult.. because I love him so much.. and I just wish things were different.

He needs to be on medication.. and he needs to have counselling.. he needs to become right with himself before he can even think about trying to be in a healthy relationship with anyone else.. and if any of you are with someone who has bipolar.. and who isn't recieving any kind of professional help.. then that's the first thing I would suggest you ask them to do..

i posted on this question back in sept of 07. I dated a man for 2 1/2 yrs that was bipolar. He was on and off med bc it made him drowsey. I could not tolerate the ups and downs and left. My friend has a brother who is bipolar and suggested a product that took him off meds completely and have been living a fairly normal life. About 6 months ago i sent my ex the product. He loves it. he said he is the happiest he has been and has not had any major ups and downs. the best part was the product is all natural. just feeding your body the nutrients its lacking. I am quite confident in the product and him and i will probally get back together in the near future which is something i would not have said before.

Ohsillyme,

What was the product??

My current boyfriend of three months has been diagnosed as bipolar, and ADHD. He suffers from post traumatic stress as well. After today, I truly don't know what to do. The past two days have been utter hell. Every now and then a symptom of his bipolar disorder would emerge, but he IS medicated for it (taking Lamictil and Seroquil as a mood stabilizer) and so I made the mistake of assuming that everything was under control.
It is necessary to acknowledge that I have social anxiety, and depression. I am neurotic and so when someone criticizes me I really take it to heart. In the beginning things were SO wonderful. I fell in love with him almost immediately and he says with him it was love at first sight. But yesterday he just went crazy on me accusing me of being extremely paranoid. For example, he says that I didn't trust him because I went on OKCupid (the site where we met) to disable my account and in going to his account and seeing that he was still active (he had logged in several days earlier) and was still listed as single....he says that because I mentioned that and asked him to change his relationship status, I am paranoid. It wasn't that I didn't trust him it was that I was confused while he was still logging onto the site. He got EXTREMELY defensive. It's very difficult because of my anxiety to discern whether or not I am correct with things like this, but lately he has just been ATTACKING ATTACKING ATTACKING. He cussed at me a stream of profanities, yelling at me at the top of his lungs. We are in a long distance relationship and this is just so taxing for me. I consider myself to be an ideal gf of sorts. I try my hardest, I bend over backwards to avoid conflict. Then after yesterday's confrontation, (which was triggered when I asked him if he thought I was fat....it was a fleeting concern and I changed the subject but he claimed to be 'deeply disturbed' by my question and told me he feared that I may be psychotic because of my "extreme" paranoia...at the same time I have suffered through anorexia and he knows this)

Basically what happened was he texted me saying that he felt suicidal
I called him and he was in tears saying that he was having a revelation that he hasnt changed at all in the past 3 years or made any progress. He said the whole conversation was his fault and he was extremely sorry. I forgave and comforted him.

Then, today he calls at 5 o clock after I have texted saying Im about to nap. I spent the night rewriting his Lit essay because he was so emotionally distraught I wanted to show my love for him (I know, it sounds pathetic). I got two hours of sleep. I try to articulate this to him but he says we really need to talk to so I decide that it's necessary as well.
Its past 3 am. He only just let me off the phone. I was forced to stay on the phone with him from 5pm til 3 am. I'm so tired I can't sleep because this has driven me literally crazy.
My anxiety has only gotten worse since we've been together. Today on the phone he retracted his apology.
He said he wasn't entirely in the wrong and badgered me until I agreed that I was at fault as well. He is extremely self-righteous and any minor blows to his ego prove fatal. He says that I'm the only girl he has ever been with who has criticized him which I find very hard to believe since he has had over 10 gfs. He is my 2nd.
He accused me of being a liar, of not trusting him, he questioned my sincerity....people have told me over the years I am one of the most genuine, open-minded people and he attacked me with false accusations. I know for a fact that he is wrong and it confuses the hell out of me. It felt like he wanted me to break up with him for at least half of the conversation. "Do it baby, say it!" He said at one point. He mentioned breaking up with me twice and I said that if that's what he wanted I just wanted him to be happy and that I would always be in love with him. Nothing I say NOTHING is right. He manipulates and twists every single sentence that comes out of my mouth. While I may have social anxiety, I am aware that I am a catch. I am pretty and intelligent, and he is handsome and incredibly bright but it feels like he needs to be better at everything. I'm not allowed to do anything better than him. God Forbid. When we argue, nothing I say appears to be valid. It's gotten to the point where I'm scared to share my opinion with him because I am so used to him attacking what I say. If I say anything to contradict him I'm wrong. I'm supposed to just agree with every perfect syllable that flows from him perfect mouth.

I have made so many sacrifices for him. I have spent thousands of dollars on hotel rooms and he has visited me twice. He was supposed to come tomorrow and now he wants me to come up there because his anxiety is resurfacing and he doesn't want to have to deal with my parents. He knows how hard it is for me, unmedicated, with my anxiety to go there but I have faithfully gone because I love him. He wants me to make all the sacrifices but if I dare point it out he explodes in a rage and I am left feeling guilty. I always have to visit him because he spends all his money on pot (which he claims he NEEDS) and things like video games. It seems like I am not a priority. He says that everything I say is a contradiction but I feel that way about him. His perception of me is so off!


I'm so dumbfounded and frustrated. I never have been in a situation with someone so unreasonable before. I know I have my problems (see aforementioned) but I have NEVER consciously attacked someone the way he attacks me. He even attacked me for being nice, he thinks all is a sham and I am just being myself. He says I never smile when I'm with him and that I always look miserable. I have always been happy with him and everyone says I do smile all the time. My sister saw us together and said I was smiling the whole time and he says in private somehow everything changes.
Am I the crazy one here? Maybe we're both crazy. I certainly have not been perfectly sane, especially as of late but even when I choose my words really carefully and try to be considerate he launches attack after attack and claims that the reason he is acting like this is because his ex fiancee tried suing him after they separated (and now he expects me to do the same). He has abandonment issues and thinks that I will be like all his other ex girlfriends.
I have my own problems which I rarely bring to the table because I don't want to be a burden but now it feels like I am walking on egg shells.

Were this anyone else I would have left no question. But I fell in love with him and I'm loyal I love him even if it feels like he doesn't want my love. I just don't know anymore. I'm so lost.

I have been with my bipolar boyfriend for 4 years now. We had a lot up and down for first 2 year, but last 2 year things go really well. He is regularly seing his dr, and taking medication everyday. He knew his condition more then anybody. He can control himself most of the time, never throw tantrum with me or saying any harse words. I think its time for me to really think about this relationship, since a lot of story about bipolar merriage. I don't know should i merried him? Will he betray me, hit me, do anything that might hurt me one day?

I feel like a terrible person. Reading everyones posts made me realize that there is a very high and strong chance that my ex has an extreme case of bipolar. I have experienced almost everything these women have mentioned. From anger problems to him accusing me of cheating, insanely jealous, and accusing me of the silliest things! Omg its been an emotional rollercoaster this past year. But it was also the most memorable year ive had, we had so much fun together! We broke up because it seemed like he was pushing me away, when Im guessing was not his intentions. Any ways...hes been calling and texting apologizing to me. Everytime we get back together its always the same thing. "ive changed" he says. He also says that he knows that his behavior was unacceptable and he will NEVER act like that again, but then again....ive heard this atleast twice so far. Almost everytime I fall for it. But like all these women say...on good days..omg its phenomenal. I love him so much. And on his bad days...im afraid to speak. I know right now Im speaking to the man Im in love with...not the one with his anger problem and possibly bi polar self. Am I a terrible person for not taking him back if he really is bi polar and its something he cant help? Or should I demand him to go to his psych doc and see if he really is...I dont know what to do! I miss the man I fell in love with!

I'm so thankful for this site i thought i was the only one going through this. the first year was amazing and it was all downhill from there. ive attempted to move on well be apart for about 3 months and then he'll realize he loves me and he wants work on things. then a month will be great,after that it goes back to the same old thing. im just so tired of having to attempt to bite my tongue in order of getting through the day with out a fight. ive put up with verbal abuse from him.he assumes im sleeping around. when time and time again he has cheated on me but wont admit to it, im just so fed up. i love him very much but shouldn't we love ourselves more. theirs only so much i can take. at the beginning my self esteem was just so high and now a days if felt as ugly and useless as an old rag.ive tried to be understanding because of the situation but its like walking on eggshells daily. he has finally gotten back to his meds and seing a therapist. i had refused to see him for the past 4 months i would answer calls and be a friend he would call be about 5 times a day. i was letting him get better on his own,well he convinced me to go out with him for dinner and a movie and it was great just an amazing night. then he disappears for 3 days when i question it he says im being to clingy and now he wants nothing to do with me all over again. i dont understand how he can go for months calling me like crazy then i give in see him and now im the one with the issue ?? i just dont know what to do.

I am new to this forum , but I can relate to everything your all saying .
I started dateing a guy who has bi polar 3 months ago , though I have known him on and off for 6 years ,
he pursued me relaentlessly and I eventually decided to start dateing him , we get along great and I have fallen in love with him . I have studied hard on bi polar so i can understand him better , the triggers etc , but some days it is so hard for me . Some days he is so loving others he pulls back , doesnt take my calls . texts etc .
I am struggling to trust him , when he senses this , he makes a huge effort with me and draws me back in , only the a few days later pull away again . my anxiety level is off the scale and i am in a muddle to know whether i should really be putting up with this . though he has an illness , i respect this , i find his behaviour unfair and very selfish , i find myself excuseng his behaviour with friends etc as he has an illness dont be to hard on him . but i am also mindful not to be the ever caretaker . what bothers me most is why he purseued me so heavily and then plays with me like this . he sees me when its convienient for him and doesnt really concider my feelings .
am i just wasting my time here , id love some thoughts from people in the same situation .
i worry he acts out when he is manic / stressed with other women , baggage form my past but i know he is very sexual when he is manic .
he is incredibly attentive sometimes and others completely oblivious of me being around .

hi dintyb - I am in a kindof similar situation as you. I live with my BP boyfriend - we have been together for a year and he found out just before then that he is bipolar. It has been a rough ride. And I know it is going to continue that way. i am questioning at the moment whether i will be strong enough to cope in the long term. I have read sooooo many forum posts lately where people who've been married for like 28 years can't cope anymore. Though I love my boyfriend, I am scared that might happen to me. I want to be with him - I want us to have a family together, but then there is the issue of bipolar being somewhat hereditary, my god how would I deal with a bipolar spouse AND a bipolar child. It's a scary road. For now, I'm happy to travel down it, and I hope that lasts, but I really just don't know.. Good luck to you.