Abortion Debate Forum - Single Motherhood

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Q: Single Motherhood

asked by: xphile_1002 on December 9th, 2004

New User

Okay, I just read bd's post about what prolifers thought of women who aborted. I guess this could kind of tie into it, and I wanted to know where prolifers stand on this issue.

As a single woman who is pregnant, I have been trashed by prolifers (yes, only prolifers) for being single and pregnant. Some examples of what has been done:

1. In a chatroom I frequent (abortion debate on yahoo!) a prolifer has made awful names such as xphiles_bas ard_child, xphiles_armless_bas ard_child, xphiles_cancer_infested_bas ard_child...We ll, I could go on but i'm sure you get the picture.

2. I've been told that I didn't use contraception (which is funny, the condom my boyfriend used broke, obviously, or I wouldn't be pregnant)

3. I was told by a catholic (i only know s/he was catholic by the name, "pray_the_rosary") that I was what was wrong with the world today.

4. I was told by someone on another discussion board that my child would grow up to be violent, a rapist, a killer, depressed, suicidal...

Therefore, I would like to know what the prolifers on this board think of single mothers. It seems that i'm "evil" for getting pregnant outside of marriage but I would have been "evil" for getting an abortion.

Part of me has come to the conclusion that prolifers really *do* want to control women's sexual/reproductive choices. They don't really care about the child.

Oh, and i'm not a pregnant teen, i'm 25...And I support myself, no, i'm not on welfare.

Replies(40)

bd1012

replied on December 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

X is not lying, I also frequent that chat and have seen the names myself and they are exactly what she posted..

What exaclty do you "prolifers" expect single mothers to do? Abort or continue the pregnancy? You don't want her to abort, then you sure aren't doing a good job at motivating her should she experience another unplanned pregnancy..

cphilyaw

replied on December 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Sweetheart I find that your child will be wonderful and is not all those names the other people called it,,,,,,yes people make mistakes accidents happen but a child is no mistake or accident..People make them, you are in a situation where you need support not criticism, you need the support that you can be a great single mother but not the support to go out here and do it again and again but that you can and will handle the situation at hand Smile

jenn_smithson

replied on December 9th, 2004

Active User, very eHealthy

cphilyaw wrote:

sweetheart

how old do you think she is? I personally abhor patronizing comments myself but I will let x make of it what she will.

Quote:

people make them, you are in a situation where you need support not criticism, you need the support that you can be a great single mother but not the support to go out here and do it again and again but that you can and will handle the situation at hand Smile

do you honestly believe that if you support a woman in x-phile's situation, that she will actually "go out here and do it again and again"? And, what if she did? Would she be any less entitled to support with her second and third child than with her first? You claim that she does need support but that if she does it "again and again" she shouldn't be supported. Also, do you think that a single mother cannot do it without your type of support? I say your type because the way your post reads, it seems like you're saying you only favor giving her support if she never, ever makes this "mistake" again. I am open to any explanation available.

Moira

replied on December 9th, 2004

Experienced User

X, these people are a$$es. Ignore them, and pity them for their utter stupidity.

cphilyaw

replied on December 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Moira how old are you if you have to curse to hold a coversation?

X: to answer what she said, yes you should have support regardless of how many but you have the responsibility to control the situation...Birth control etc..... When I say support I mean by her family, friends, the public should, thats what should happen if everybody was understanding and considerite (sp)

oopoopoop

replied on December 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

It is interesting to note that those societies that condemn abortion also condemn single mothers. The only reason that being a single mother is now acceptable because abortion is available. A single woman who has a child could have had an abortion. It therefore becomes impossible to know which single women have not been pregnant.

jenn_smithson

replied on December 9th, 2004

Active User, very eHealthy

cphilyaw wrote:

to answer what she said, yes you should have support regardless of how many but you have the responsibility to control the situation

another control freak. There you go x. You can have support for this child just as long as you never have pre-marital sex again because it could get you in this situation again.

xphile_1002

replied on December 9th, 2004

New User

cphilyaw wrote:

moira how old are you if you have to curse to hold a coversation?

X: to answer what she said, yes you should have support regardless of how many but you have the responsibility to control the situation...Birth control etc..... When I say support I mean by her family, friends, the public should, thats what should happen if everybody was understanding and considerite (sp)

first of all, i'm 25 years old...Hardly a child. Second of all...I did use birth control and it failed...I mentioned that in the original post. Birth control fails.

sandyallen

replied on December 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

Xphile_1002

You made the choice that you feel is the correct choice, no one has a right to judge you or call you names, even if you would decide to abort, that is what we pro-choicers are here for and that is to back you up and to let you realize your choices throught thick or thin, that is why most pro-lifers are hypocritical.
Most pro-lifers do not realize that there is a need a lot of times for an abortion because they have a lack of understanding of certain needs because they are not walking in this pregnant person's shoes and they are tooo quick to judge, this is why I am pro-choice because I do understand that cicumstances are different for all pregnant females.
Sincerely,
sandy

steen

replied on December 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

Re: Single Motherhood

xphile_1002 wrote:

okay, I just read bd's post about what prolifers thought of women who aborted. I guess this could kind of tie into it, and I wanted to know where prolifers stand on this issue.

As a single woman who is pregnant, I have been trashed by prolifers (yes, only prolifers) for being single and pregnant. Some examples of what has been done:

as you have no doubt figured out by now, many pro-lifers are nothing but hatemongers. They love sin, they get exstatic over sin, because that gives them sinners to hate, which is the only thing that brings fullfillment to their misogynistic, cold, and punitive very small hearts.

2ferano

replied on December 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

X that is such a great point that you brought up. I have noticed the same thing with prolife people. (once again, not all, but a lot) you are bad for having an abortion but you are going to hell for having the baby, so either way they won't be happy. They are just unhappy people who need something to complain about and someone to hate! Just humor yourself knowing that a lot of them don't have parents who were together when they were conceived and such. People usually hate what they hate about themselves!

Izzy