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Pregnancy Forum > Teen Pregnancy Forum > I Lost My Little Angel.. (Page 1)
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Q: I Lost My Little Angel..
asked by: Innchik18 on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Well my worse nightmare came true... Tuesday night I miscarried my little angel. I do not why this happened and to say the truth when I found out I was pregnant I was so happy that miscarriage never even crossed my mind until I saw the first drop of blood. After 4 months of desperately trying this baby was the answer to all my prayers. I woke up everyday with a reason to live and july 10th (my supposed to be due date) seemed so far away. Now I keep thinking what did I do to cause this? Was it something I did or said? Did I not take good care of my baby? I tried to be the best mommy I could, I took my vitamins everyday, I tried to eat healthy, I exercised, I visited my doctor. What else could I have done? I keep thinking did my little baby feel anything? Did she hurt? Did this happen for the best? Since many times an early miscarriage means the body gets rid of the baby because it is not developing properly. Miscarriage is something that noone will never understand until they personally will go through. Such pain (physical and emotional) is something I do not wish my my worst enemy and never want to go through this again. It hurts to much that I never got to find out if my baby was a boy or girl? It hurts I never got to hold my little baby or tell her how much I love her. It hurts so much to wake up everyday knowing my baby is gone and it feels like it is a week long nightmare that I will wake up from soon. But reality is setting in, I lost my little angel. She is up in heaven now smiling... So many unanswerable questions. Well let my tell my story of how it happened? Monday night I was watching tv with my husband and felt something wet on my panties so when I went to the bathroom and what I saw made my heart stop beating. There are brownish spotting, I yelled for my husband out of fear. He came and tried to calm me down saying that it might be ok. So I went to bed that day not thinking much about it just paranoid. The next day at work I went to the bathroom every 20 minutes to check if there was more blood. There was nothing there other than some brown stuff when I would wipe. But then at about 2:45 pm tuesday I went to the bathroom and my panties were all in red blood. I started shaking because I knew this wouldnt be good. I tired to act calm since I was at work but thank god I work at a hospital. So I shut down my computer and ran to the er. I was trying not to not cry because all these people know me in the er since they are part of the department I work in. So I checked in with the nurse.. Filled out all the paperwork and then called my husband at work so that he can come. An hr later my husband came just in time when the doctor came to check me. He did a pelvic exam and a blood test which both hurt very bad. He then came back and said that my cervix was not opening and that my hcg's were in the range for my size (20,000). So he sent me home saying to keep my fingers crossed and just wait. Although the doctor told me to be on bed-rest my husband was like, oh its ok lets go to church. So we did and about 2 hours after we came back from the er I started getting really bad cramps. Deep down inside I knew what was happening yet I tried to block it out of my head. About an hour later I went to the bathroom and a huge chunk on blood came out. I was in so much pain and I still did not fully understand what was going on. I came upstairs and told my husband he became pale and I knew he was scared! So we left home. That night was the worst night of my life. I did not get any sleep, but was in the bathroom with blood gushing out of me with huge clots and tissue coming out. My cramps were so bad I was losing consciousness since I did have any pain meds and was scared to take any even if I did. At about 4 am I finally took some advil because I could not take it anymore. That morning my husband went to work, but I could not even get out of bed to kiss him when he left. I was exhausted and in so much pain that I did not even want to live. I knew I had to go back to the er so that a doc came check me out and tell me for sure if I miscarried (although I knew I did). I dragged myself into the shower and at about this time my husband walked through the door again. I knew the night was hard for him also, although I told him to sleep and I will try to be quiet, I knew he was not sleeping much either. He just tried to stay out of my way because he knew there was nothing he can do to help me. He said that he could not be at work while I was suffering at home. So I took a quick painful shower and we went back to the er. This visit ended up to be 6 hours. After another pelvic exam the doctor said that I was 4 cm dilated and chances are my baby has already came out during the night. And my hcg’s dropped from 20,000 yesterday to 8,000 today. So pretty much there was no chance at all. There was not much they can do, I asked for an ultrasound just to confirm everything but the doctor declined and said, “im sorry but you are no longer pregnant, you miscarried your baby.” he sent me home with 4 different types of prescription medication. 2 were for contraction of my uterus to get all the remains out and vicoddin for pain. So that’s my story, now I am sitting at home so lonely and miserable. I am scared to get pregnant again because I do not want to ever go through this again and I know my pain will not subside with another baby. But I do want a baby really bad. So we’ll see what happens later.
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SamiNSunisMa
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Ohhh hugs u did *n*o*t*h*i*n*g wrong!!!! Im so sorry!
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Omg...I am sooooo sincerely sorry hunny! And I am here if you need me I swear for anything I will listen to you vent for hours if I have to! I just want you to know one thing...I know this is painful physically and emotionally..But I want you to know that you do have an angel now and you will have a baby when you are ready. This horrible situation that has happened to you, it's going to make you stronger trust me. And this baby might have just not have been meant to be for you and your husband. I am a true believer that everyone has a plan that has been worked out through god and that their life goes in the direction that it is supposed to. You would not be put in a situation that you cannot handle. I'm soo very sorry..And like I said before if you need anything ...Just say the word!
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kitty2luv
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Awww I am sooo sorry its not yr fault
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Awww thanks, I know I probably did not do anything wrong but its so hard not knowing why it happened. I want to blame myself or blame somebody it will just feel better to have an answer!!
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Jenny.. Hun thanks so much! I have no told anybody about this. I do not want my family to find out and my husband is sort of sick of hearing my talk about it. He got mad at me last night because I could not stop crying. He said that we need to move on and stop bringing it up.. But its so hard. So thanks for reading about my horrible experience and offering to listen to me. It really makes it hurt less if I talk about it, but it conforts me to know that I have a little angel in heaven. Wink
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sdwood2
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Active User, very eHealthy
Im so sorry hun how faw along were you
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Moira
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Oh hun i'm so sorry for your loss and wish you and your family all the best.

Miscarriages just happen, you did nothing wrong. If it helps at all, fetus' that early can't feel pain and aren't self aware - it won't have hurt you angel, and it won't have known what was happening.

Take your time to grieve with your haubbie. I'll be thinking of you.
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Some things have no answers just an answer of .."it wasn't meant to be" and one day you will find that answer I promise! Like on montel yesterday this women's cousin committed suicide and everyone thought he was soo positive and loving and they always said he was like a big teddy bear. Well she got her sonogram done..And there was a picture that depicted a teddy bear in it..And sylvia brown said that the cousin who committed suicide ended up reincarnating himself as the womens baby boy! The man was meant to live as something else ya know and the women was meant to have a baby. Or another situation would be my mom...She dated this guy all through high school they were engaged and she broke off the engagement to marry my dad who she had only known for 6 months before they got married! But it happened so she could have me! Or my friend jenny ..She was a wild teenager and she became pregnant and now she's the best mother I think i've ever seen. But her twin boys were put in her life to make her focus and make something of herself! You'll find a reason..And you'll learn why..It just takes time thats all
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Sdwoods- I would have been 10 weeks this sunday. And although it might not seem all that much.. But it felt like I was pregnant for a while and now its just all gone. Like it never happened!!
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
It will happen again! I would recommend not ttc'ing for a while though. I would just let it happen naturally.
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Moira are you sure that fetuses at 9.5 weeks do not feel any pain? Thats what I was sort of worried about. Since I was in so much pain that my baby was feeling it also since the heart and nervous system was already developed. I am soooo mad because this wednesday I was suppose to have my first ultrasound to hear the heartbeat. In one single week I would have gotten the chance to heat the heartbeat and now I can't. But I am soo relieved if the baby did not feel anything.
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
I don't think they can feel anything yet. Nothing like that anyways at that early on in the pregnancy. You think maybe it was best that you didn't hear the heartbeat?
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Jenny- I dont know if it was best that I did not hear it. I was waiting for wednesday to come soo bad. My husband and I both asked for that day off so that we can go together. But now really thinking about it I guess it was for the best since I would get even moer attached to the baby. It would be even harder to lose it now if I would have heard its little heartbeat. So I guess it was better.. And what did you mean it will happen again? My doc told me to go through one normal menustral cycle and then it would be safe again. And that this miscarriage should not affect anything for the future. I have an appt with an ob doctor monday so that she can check if everything came out. Otherwise they will have to do an d & c.. Manually knock me out and stick a vaccum kind of suction and suck all the remains out.
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
what??? You need to be takin off this site health forum!!! Shut the f!Ck up and get off this site if you don't have nice things to say! You are a stupid health forum that doesn't have a life of her own so she comes on here and starts dumb caca with everyone else! Nobody even doing it likes you here so go get on some other forums nerves because nothing that comes out of your mouth has any meaning what so ever thats why nobody likes you because you are a nothing!
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JeNNy985
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Whew..That insurancegirl gets on my nerves.....


Anyways...

What I was saying was that some women have to take a lot more time off to try to have a baby again ...So I didn't know if you had to or if they were going to let you go back to trying like when your next cycle starts!! I'm glad that you won't have to wait though that's wonderful news!
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Insurancegirl- you have no right to call me a fake. I am new here and I have not done or said anything towards you in order for you to call me a fake. As I said it before ill say it again.. I do not wish a miscarriage on my worse nightmare. If only you knew what I went through tuesday night. I am talking about this here because I have not told any of my family members. So please do not judge me if you do not know me. If you suspect me than do not read about my experience. But thank god there are some awesome girls here that actually care for each other and other help and advice. I am not asking anything from you so please do not add to my pain. I have went through even and do not need your bs.
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Kia
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Supporter
I am so sorry honey, I can say I do know how it feels, my little one was taken from me 5 weeks ago today - I ws 18 1/2 weeks.

Hugz
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Innchik18
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Experienced User
Jenny thanks hun for sticking up for me. I do not have the energy to fight back for myself. I have barely slept in 3 days and do not been her bs!!!! God why are some people so stupid??? Dang I do not understand some people. If I was a fake why the heck would I write a 3 page essay about me miscarrying? All the details I wrote about. Im sorry but if I did not actually go thorugh it and I would not have known exactly what happens. I have a life unlike insurancegirl so please do me a favor and just leave me alone. I do not know you and do not want to know you.
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Kia
replied on December 2nd, 2004
Supporter
Let's not turn this into an arguement because of one person.
Innchick I don't think your baby would have been in pain, although things are developing including the nervous system they are not yet functional.

Take a few months out then if you want to ttc go ahead you will always remember your angel.

I was talking to an indian lady today in the shop and she asked why I was slow/stooped and I told her I had had surgury and she asked a bit more so I told her about my hysterectomy and she told me about her daughter.

Her daughter died at 2 years old from serious heart problems, 3 days later the lady found she was pregnant, she told me her daughter had left so she could go and get a healthy body and come back. What a nice thing to think.
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