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Relationships > Dating Forum > Boyfriend Doesn't Seem Motivated...what Can I Do?
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Q: Boyfriend Doesn't Seem Motivated...what Can I Do?
asked by: ScaredBaka on November 22nd, 2004
Experienced User
My boyfriend and I are both high school seniors, and are both hoping to graduate this year. I have no doubts about myself - my grades are usually average to above average, with their occasional fluctuations as a result of a missed homework assignment every once in a while. But my boyfriend on the other hand is doing badly in most of his classes.

Last year he blew off gym class, and when he realized failing it may keep him from graduating, he has to take it every day this year, rather than the usual every other day. And while he's doing very well in gym, his math and web design class grades are bad...Those are the ones I know of that are poor. He doesn't do his math homework, which can really keep the grade up (was my only hope when I had his teacher because I suck at math).

I could be wrong, but from what I can see, he is not very motivated to graduate with me. I don't want him to be left behind and pass with the juniors - I want us to be together on the day we accept our diplomas. But without passing grades, that's not going to happen.

......................

My boyfriend does not have a job, and very rarely goes anywhere outside his house except school. So he has more than adequate time to complete homework and prepare for tests, but for some reason he refuses to. I know grades are not important to him, at least not how they are to me.

All students are entitled to blow off some assignments - I know because I do it often but still maintain good grades. I don't know what my boyfriend's problem is.

He says he wants to graduate high school and go on to college to major in either a field of electronics or computers (he doesn't know what specifically yet), but at the rate he's going, he'll never see the cap and gown. I don't want to see him wind up jobless and laying around the house all day, with only my income supporting us. I want him to be proud of himself, and have confidence, and I know having the career you truly want can make that happen.

.............................

I want to get him more motivated to do good in school; even if he passes by the skin of his teeth this year i'll be pleased.

Is there anything I can possibly do to give him the edge he needs to improve his academic skills?

...............

Scaredbaka - desperately hoping her guy is a senior for only one year
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Liz912
replied on May 20th, 2009
New User
Terrible Grades.
Don't feel bad! I'm going into High School next year, my boyfriend will be a senior next year. He loves me to death, he'd do anything for me. He does in school and his mom grounds him every weekend. I told him that if he didn't improve his grades that I'd have no choice but to leave him. I didn't want to be stuck with the type of guy who'd be flippin' burgers at McDonald's for the rest of his life...that wasn't even enough motivation for him. Every time I talk about leaving him, he starts to cry and I can't stand it...so I give him another chance...and another...and another...='( I'm in over my head.
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thoumas
replied on May 29th, 2009
Experienced User
hey if this is happening to you (and you are having sex) then threaten to stop putting out(sorry to be so rude about it) if your not having sex but you want to then tell him youll have sex if he does better. and if you dont want to have sex then you will have to come up with some way to "reward" him if he does better. believe me im in high school right now and if you do that i promise (unless he is gay, and it is a cover up) he will either do better or your better off without him
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