Severely Allergic to Birth Control And He Hates Condoms! Posted: 11-21-04 11:59am
Hi....I have a question about what you
suggest doing
i have a very rare allergy to birth
control that causes brain and spinal cord
swelling so in short I could die from it.
My fiance and I have tried to have sex
with condoms multiple times but it never
works b/c he hates them so much and then
he goes limp...So he's frustrated and so
am I b/c we never get to finish
anything.
So what have been your experiences with
using a diaphram and spermicide alone?
What else would you suggest?
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l2at24
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 1509
Posted: 11-21-04 12:49pm
Have you talked to your doctor about other
options? Like an iud. Usually you have
to have had a child, and it is a long term
choice. Like if you don't want children
for the next 5 years or more, but there's
one that has no hormones.
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l2at24
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 1509
Posted: 11-21-04 12:49pm
Have you talked to your doctor about other
options? Like an iud. Usually you have
to have had a child, and it is a long term
choice. Like if you don't want children
for the next 5 years or more, but there's
one that has no hormones.
|
l2at24
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Nov 2004 Posts: 1509
Posted: 11-21-04 12:49pm
Have you talked to your doctor about other
options? Like an iud. Usually you have
to have had a child, and it is a long term
choice. Like if you don't want children
for the next 5 years or more, but there's
one that has no hormones.
|
Cassy
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Jun 2004 Posts: 103
Posted: 11-21-04 14:49pm
I would never use spermicide alone. It's
just not a very good choice because it's
no where near being very effectivbe by
itself. Use it with the diaphram. When
does he go limp? You could always try
putting a penis ring over the condom,
it'll keep the blood in his penis so it'll
be harder to just 'go limp'
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PattyV
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 01 May 2004 Posts: 1103 Location: Chicago area
Posted: 11-21-04 16:53pm
Hey,cassey.Sorry to hear of your problem
w/ bcp's.Have you and your honey tried
durex extra sensitve condoms??They are
great!!Almost like nothing at all!!!Talk
with your gyn and see what she/he
recommends as an alternative to bcp's.I
had to stop the pill due to severe
menstrual migraines,the headaches were so
severe that the doc thought I was at high
risk for a stroke.Bummer-i was very happy
with the pill!!However, I am much older
than you are and I am considering having a
tubal ligation or ,if I can talk my hubby
into a little snip snip!In the mean time,
we are using durex condoms with the ky
warming lubricant-that stuff is
awesome!!!Give them both a try.Good luck
to both of you.Patty
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jriegel
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Nov 2004 Posts: 54
Posted: 11-21-04 19:16pm
Hey
check out the natural family planning
thread. It looks like a lot of info, but
I was very detailed so if anyone wanted to
actually begin practicing birth control
through natural family planning, they
would be able to.
You've probably heard about it, and heard
that it doesn't work. It's actually as
effective as birth control (99%) and it's
free, it's *drug* free, and it only takes
about two minutes a day to observe the
symptoms.
There are hundreds of thousands of women
who have used natural family planning, for
one reason or another, successfully for
several years, many near 20 years.
Basically, when you are about to ovulate
(the time during your cycle when you can
get pregnant) your body shows three
symptoms: a change in your cervix, and
change in your cervical mucus which makes
your vagina very fertile for sperm, when
it is otherwise very hostile/acidic, and a
change in temperature.
By observing these symptoms every day,
(like I said it only takes about two
minutes a day, one in the morning and one
at night) you will be able to see when
they change, and be confident when you
have ovulated. You are fertile during
your cycle right after your period and
usually for 4 days to two and a half
weeks, depending on how long your cycle
is. But even if you have irregular
cycles, these symptoms *always* happen, so
you can be sure. And after you have
ovulated, which you will know by observing
these changes, you can have sex as much as
you want, whenever you want, without fear
of becoming pregnant because you have
already ovulated--there's nothing to
fertilze--until your next cycle begins
(that is, the beginning of your next
period, usually about 2-3 weeks, depending
on your cycle). You can even have sex
into the 2nd day of your period, the 3rd
if you have a longer cycle (28+ days).
Some people think this is too much to deal
with, but in your situation it is
definitely an option that is safe,
effective, cheap, and worthwhile
considering. There are several books on
this form of birth control if you're
interested, and i'd say, considering your
situation, you should definitely consider
it. One is called "the art of natural
family planning" and another is "taking
charge of your fertility".
You can also use other forms of barrier
protection (condom, diaphragm, etc.)
during the days after your period when you
are fertile, until you know you have
ovulated. This is a bit risky because
condoms, for example, are only 75%
effective. But my husband and I do it,
and we're not ever had a scare (we've been
using natural family planning for about a
year now).
Check out that thread and let me know if
you have any questions. There are also
several other women on this board who use
this form of birth control, so ask away.
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starshyne530
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2004 Posts: 90 Location: NY
Posted: 11-22-04 12:33pm
So he hates condoms... That doesn't mean
you should go unprotected. I have to
agree with patty... Has he ever tried a
thinner type condom? I know my boyfriend
and I use trojan ultra pleasure with
spermicidal lubricant and he says it's the
practically the same feeling as when we
don't use condoms. Give them a whirl, and
if he still just can't keep it up then ask
your doctor about other types of birth
control, like sponges or diaphragms...
There's a world of options.
Or, we could all take a lesson from talk
sex with sue... When she gets this
question about the man hating condoms, she
suggests that you keep using whatever
brand of condoms you have, and everytime
you try to have sex with the condom and he
goes limp, that that's it... You're done
for the night. You keep doing that until
he is so blue-balled that it doesn't
matter if he has a condom on, he is going
to keep his erection and he is going to
finish because he just has to, or he is
going to explode from sexual frustration.
I don't know how well that works, but it's
an interesting idea. You should check out
www.Talksexwithsue.Com
because she has all kinds of information
of all sorts of sex stuff. It's great.
Ok, i'm done... Have fun kids!
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sweetdiego7
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Mar 2004 Posts: 35 Location: CA
Posted: 11-22-04 13:03pm
Hehe she's great! I find her on tv every
now and again...Lol she makes me laugh.
She's just this lil old lady and it always
makes me giggle when she whips out her
toys and such and tells you the pros and
cons. I always try to answer the
questions that people ask her before she
does to see how well I do...Im 23/23 so
far!!! Yay for me and being well
educated in sex. Hehehe
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steen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Nov 2004 Posts: 1797 Location: Upper Midwest
Posted: 11-22-04 18:07pm
What kind of birthcontrol pill are you
allergic to? Are you allergic to
progesterone-only pills or depo provera
shots of progesterone? If it is only the
estrogen that you are allergic to, then
those are options.
What is the condition that gives you such
risks, and is it an actual physician who
told you about that risk?
