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to Much Stress!!!

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Hi everyone, I am new here at the board. I am 19 and 25 wks pregnant. I am not with the biological father and haven't talked to him since I kicked him out at 2 1/2 months. I am back with the guy I was with before the babys dad. But we have had some problems. Big ones. He told me once that he wanted me to give up my baby. Yeah right! I could never do that. He constantly throws it in my face that I messed up. But after we have these fights and I am bawling he finnallt tells me he is sorry and he never meant any of it... He tells me he never will say anything like it again... But it never fails he is always bringing it up somehow... Now we are getting married 10-29-04...2 days and I will be a married woman!!! Aaahhh!!!! And he wants me to put his name on the birth certificate....I have no problem with that but could I get in trouble if the real father doesn't approve??? I already am giving it his last name and his first name is gonna be the babys middle name.... I just know the biological father is gonna flip after he finds all that out... Oh I am finnally moving outta my mothers house in the beginning of november... So much going through my head!!!!! Just wanna scream... I am gonna be a lonely pregnant girl because my soon to be husband works till 4pm to 1 am and I work 11 am to 4om... So sad!!! I will be home alone all the time... I also have depression/anxiety and bipolar disorder..... Still sometimes a cutter... But not as much... I just hate being alone all the time... Well I got to get going.... This is getting to long....
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replied October 27th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Stick with us!!! It will be okay. You can get into trouble if you put his name on it and he isnt the real father, I think. Everything will work out honey just relax...Its hard on everyone right now.


-kristin
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replied October 27th, 2004
Experienced User
Well if I don't put my husbands name on it then it will be blank... There is no way the real fathers name is going on it... I am also not going after him for child support either... I want nothing to do with him...
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replied October 27th, 2004
Experienced User
Best to leave it blank than lie... I'm pretty sure you can get into real trouble for doing that! Good luck and stick around... We'll take care of ya!
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replied October 27th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
You could always just say that you "thought* your hubby was the real father when you filled out the form. There can't be a law against being ill-informed! Tell your ex you made a mistake and from the dates it couldn't have been his, etc, etc.
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replied October 27th, 2004
Experienced User
I actually thought about doing that.... There was this one time about the time I got pregnant.... We were all at a party and biological father left because he was pissed and I just hung around with my fiance... I could tell my ex that I slept with him... But I was thinking he would still want a blood test... I can say no to the blood test till he takes me to court... Right?
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replied October 27th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Not if the judge thinks he has a good case and orders you to submit to one. Then you'd have to take it or be in contempt of court and go to jail! Of course, there's always the chance that your ex wouldn't care about the baby and would just leave you alone, or would believe you and wouldn't fight it. The alternative is you get ordered to take a blood test and they find out its his, and you just say "oh my gosh I had no idea." i'd say the chance of him *not* fighting it is worth it.
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replied October 27th, 2004
Experienced User
I have a feeling that after he finds out the babys name he won't want nothing to do with it... My baby is being named after my husband to be... I just have this feeling he will be so pissed that he will be like my kid's name is not _____. You know?
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replied October 28th, 2004
Extremely eHealthy
Re: to Much Stress!!!
Stress it not good during pregnancy, it can lead to bad things. But anyway, look on the bright side, your about to have a baby (: be happy!

Im ka, 14 years old & 30wks pregnant tom. Welcome to the boards, u'll get very addicted, lol. Congradulations on the pregnancy!
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replied October 28th, 2004
Experienced User
First off...I'm only 19 and you may not think I know what i'm talking about or maybe I really don't know what i'm talking about but you said your soon to be husband keeps pretty much verbally and emotionally abusing you...Says he's sorry..But fails to keep his promise about doing it again. Maybe there are some issues you need to work out before you get married. If he is always going to hold this grudge against you for keeping another mans baby then your marriage won't be as happy and healthy as it could be ya know? As far as the birth certificate goes...Since the biological father acts like he doesn't want anything to do with the baby then I would just leave it blank then maybe later down the line you can bring up the idea of your new husband maybe adopting the child. It's seems the safe way to go!
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