Birth control doesnt hurt but there can be side effects. You deffinatley sound like you are not ready for sex. Sex the first time can be very painful and there can be alot of bleeding. It can be a wonderful experience or very traumatic if you are not ready I think you need to wait until you are emotionally ready. In the meantime you should talk to an adult you trust regarding these questions. You will get the correct answers you need. In canada we have planned parenthoods that are free and confidential. You should see if there is anything in your area similar to this.

What are the side affects? I know that I want to try to have sex but how will I know that I am ready like how will my body know how much do you bleed? Thanx for the advice.

whitney,
hey! First of all, how old are you girlie? Secondly...I lost my virginity when I was 18 and half years old...And I was sooooooo not ready. I thought that I was with someone that I loved and who loved me back....We'd been together for a long time and I knew he was the one...And when the time came, after months of, "no, i'm not ready", I finally said ok. And it was a terrible experience....I bled, but not a lot. And yes, it hurt. A lot. But I stopped him as soon as he entered me bc in that millasecond, I realized that he was not the one...And he broke up with me the next day, after I walked in on him with another girl in our bed. So. The only reason I am telling you allllllll of this is bc I am trying to make a point that I was an adult in a long standing relationship, and still, I was not ready.

But! There is good news.....I made that guy wait for months and months and months...And then months after we broke up, I mean almost a year... I met my current boyfriend, who I now live with. And this time I just knew he was the one....I was niaeve with the first one...But the moment I met my current bf I just knew. The feeling was overwhelming...And I didn't make him wait very long before we had sex. Bc in my heart, it fealt right. And it was. And he was so good with me. And sex hurt, i'm not goin to lie. It hurt for about a month. But if your man is gentle with you, and responds to your needs, you'll be ok, and you'll learn to enjoy sex.

Ps, try birth control...Every person is different...I had bad luck with the first two I tried...And I am starting another one this week, to try my luck with that one...No need for unexpected babies! Good luck!

Well, this is what I tell all my friends who ever ask me (because I was the first to have sex) if you have any doubt in your mind about having sex. Any doubt, don't do it. Sex means something different to everyone but if you ever think for a second that you aren't ready then you're not ready. I'm 17, my boyfriend and I have been going out for a year and a half. After four months, I was ready to loose my virginity. And it was kind of comforting knowing we'd loose it together (he being a virgin, too.) and we knew all the consequences, he never ever pressured me, and thus....We had sex. It hurt the first few times, a lot. But I never bled. And now i'm glad that I did it. I think it brought us closer together because you really have to trust someone to let them see you naked. but it was a few months before I started using perscription birth control (we always used condoms) and that I wasn't ready for. I was naive and thought all the bad side effects would never happen to me. Well, anything bad that could happen did. (btw, stay away from depo) and it took 7 motnhs to straighten it out. Now I think (i hope) i"m finally accepting my new pill.

My point being, sex is a big step and being on perscription birth control is a big step. Make sure you knwo what to expect and what you want out of each.

Everybody is different. For some sex the first time can hurt and/or you could bleed, or not at all. My first time did not hurt at all and I did not bleed at all. That being said... If you're really that concerned about sex you shouldnt do it. Getting on birth control is always a good idea but, as stated numerous other times on this board, everyone reacts differently to different birth control. You might need to try a couple of different kinds before you find one that works for you. The first one I tried worked, and still works great for me, but everyone's different. You could do some online research about different kinds people use, etc... And you can always make an appointment with a doctor or go to a planned parenthood or something and get some good info about birth control there. Bottom line, make sure you're well-educated on sex, birth control, and all of the good and bad stuff that goes along with them. When you're ready you'll know. Don't worry about it. Trust your instincts and intuition.

If you're scared or worried about pain, you're probably not ready for it yet.

My first time was at 17 and was probably a mistake. I knew the guy pretty well, and we used a condom. The first time we made love he put the condom on an had a premature ejaculation and I should have taken that as a sign that I shouldn't have. But he wanted to try again in the morning. I bled a bit, not much, just a pantyliner (which I had to borrow from another girl in the dorms), but I felt very raw and uncomfortable for days afterwards.

Condoms can be very effective, but I recommend a backup method, either using spermicide in the condom or the spermicide inserts for women. That way if there's any spillage from breakage, you can rest assured those sperm are dead.

But use whatever method you feel most comfortable using. I never cared for the idea of diaphrams or iuds, so I used condoms or the bcp when I was in a long relationship.

Talk to your doctor about it next time you see them. They can fit you for a diaphram or talk to you about all your options.

Take care.

There can be many sides effects .They also vary in every person. Your best bet is to go on the net and look at the various types of bc out there. They (the drug companies) dont hide the fact that there are side effects and are very good at explaining them on the leaflets that come inside all bc packages.

But how do you know if you are ready for sex? Does the spermicide for male and female hurt? When you do it the first time will it hurt for days or just a few hrs im 19 by the way

You just know in that second.....If you are second guessing yourself......Then don't do it...Don't plan it.....In a moment you will know.......And no spermicide does not hurt at all......It's just a cremey substance on condoms, and it helps lubricate yourself too........

Whitney,if you have all these hesitations,please,please, please do not have sex!You are obviously not ready and this is definately one of those things that if you don't feel right about it,don't do it!!If your boyfriend is pressuring you to have sex with him amd you don't think he's the right one-go with your gut instincts!Making love should be just that-making love.It is not a recreational sport and once you become sexually active with him,it will be very hard to stop.I wish I had used better judgment when I lost my virginity.I have had both casual sex(very stupid) and have made love when it was with the right person.It is definately better when you are both in love and committed to each other.I'm not saying that I wish I would have waited until I was married,but definately not the first boyfriend I had! Best of luck to you.Patty

ok I have a question this is what you have about you
location: lynchburg va
occupation: grauate, married
interests: poems, my hubby, being a nurse


so r u married or not because you say that
i promised my parents I would not do that till I was married
so I dont know what to think now

Not cool!!!If you are married and a nurse-just what is your point here???!!!Why would you play these games??Patty

What game? You make no sense all I ask for advice I didnt ask for a health forum so if you want to be a smart ass do it to someone else all I asked for is if birth control hurts and what are the side affects no im not married but I dont feel like changing my profile and he calls me his wife anways. Whats your point

Well, to answer your question, no... Birth control does not hurt. Side effects vary, depending on the person.

Sorry if I offended you ,but watch what you put on your profile.There are alot of people who misrepresent themselves and try to start b.S..I did not mean to upset you. . Patty

Thats ok what are the side effects of having birth control that some people have?

Eh, well I didnt have any side effects, but there are some that my doctor told me about when I started. Let's see... Some people feel nauseous after taking it, there might be increased bleeding, weight gain/loss, bloating, headaches, breast tenderness, depression... Like I said, I didnt experience any of these, but everyone is different... Im sure someone else will have a more decisive and helpful answer than I do.