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Q: Low Sex Drive
asked by: FarleyUK on October 6th, 2004
New User
Hi all!

I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years now - I am 24, she is 28 - and although I love her to bits, I just wish she would want sex with me.

I have talked to her about it, and she has assured me that it is her - she has a very low sex drive. I have tried everything - complimenting her, making sure she is secure and feels safe, buying her a vibrator etc. But nothing works.

We have not had sex for almost 2 months now.

Is there any way she can increase her sex drive with any tablets etc?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!
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Replies(12)
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FarleyUK
replied on October 6th, 2004
New User
Ok, will do, but the question was about the female low sex drive, not the male!

I have a high sex drive, but my partner has a low one. It is driving me insane and affecting our relationship.
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sensual_me
replied on October 6th, 2004
New User
If you find out how to increase female sex drive plzzzzzzzzzzz let me know.
My bf has a high drive... And gets turned on really fast .... But I dunno y ... I dont get turned on tht fast... And I have I think the lowest drive in sex history.... Itz really bothering me...
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southcoach
replied on October 6th, 2004
Experienced User
Does your girlfriend take birth control pills? If she does, they have been known to decrease this drive. Otherwise a loss in sex drive is often times a psychological thing for women--perhaps she is bothered by something? What does she say is the reason when you guys spoke about it?
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juniper
replied on October 6th, 2004
Experienced User
Sex drive largely a matter of balanced hormones.

Does your gf have any other symptoms of being out of balance hormonally? (weight problems, pms, painful ovulation, bad periods, vaginal dryness, excessive hair growth, hair loss, acne.)

she may resist the idea, but urge her to see her doctor or an endocrinologist. Sometimes it's a simple matter of a little testosterone cream applied vaginally to increase libido for women.

Take care.
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FarleyUK
replied on October 7th, 2004
New User
Cheers all,

she is worried about her weight, but it doesn't bother me that much and I keep on assuring her she looks fantastic.

She is on birth control tablets that stop her from having periods, but she used to have quite painful periods and some acne problems.

What would you recommend to try?

Thank you all so much!
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juniper
replied on October 7th, 2004
Experienced User
I think you need to ask her to see a doctor. If she had problem periods in the past and now as an adult she still has acne, she has a hormone imbalance. The pill usually only supplies estrogen, but sometimes a synthetic progesterone. These can dominate testosterone which also gives women their sex drive.

It's possible a little progesterone cream applied once a day will help to even her out (and may help with the acne as well).

If she's unwilling to see a doctor, you might want to do some reading yourself about libido and hormones. Start with what your doctor may not have told you about premenopause by Dr. Lee, it gives a great introduction to hormone balancing.

Take care.
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Demore
replied on October 10th, 2004
Experienced User
Thyroid
Ok ok think thyroid! I know this sounds weird but if your thyroid is acting up then it has various effects on your body's chemistry! Including low sex drive. My friend is getting hers taken out. Because hers became swolen (this is what a goiter is). Once it is taken out she has to be on medication for the rest of her life to replace the hormones that were released by her thyroid. She's more likely to have a raging sex drive now. That that she didn't have one already. I feel sorry for her bf he's going to wear down to nothing if she's not careful.
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bully
replied on October 21st, 2004
New User
My wife had endometrosis and low sex drive accordingly. After a hysterectomy much better,ask her if she has any sexual dreams if no then it is hormonal.Is sex painful for her?
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Demore
replied on October 21st, 2004
Experienced User
You think that non-sexual dreams are related to hormone levels? You know dreams are subconcious drives trying to be expressed not physical drives? Dreams are all about your wants and needs as a mind not a body.
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bully
replied on October 22nd, 2004
New User
I understand that about dreams but the mind controls all urges and hormones can confuse the mind and turn things off.If a woman has low sex drive and there is no other abuse then it is hormonal.
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mikef
replied on November 14th, 2004
New User
I had the same problem with my girlfriend. The doctor proposed to her to try pills for increasing sexual desire. She was taking sentia and her libido had turned to normal. We both are much happier now. Thanks to sentia!
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harleylady
replied on March 27th, 2009
New User
low sex drive
i had a hystrecotmy at 27 years old and had taken hormon replacement for about 10 years till they started making my breast very tender and sore, I couldn't even stand my bra on, so I was in my late 30's so i talked to the doctor, during all of this I lost my mom and dad 6 months and 2 days apart, go married and then lost my aunt that was like a mother to me all within 1 year, I can truly say that it is really hard to think about sex or even want to try and my husband is really upset he thinks if you don't have sex there isn't anything, we also have his daughter that lives with us she has had a really rough life because of her mother and issues with that and she really gives us alot of crap and of course being the step mother you all can just imagine hwat I got thru and he is very soft with her due to the issues because of her mom, I am at my wits end he is the love of my life and I don't want to loose him due to no sex drive I need help and I am now 48 years old I need something soon or he will be gone he is not a counsler type man he thinks they just want your money and he doesn't like talking to other people about us he really doesn't like there suggestions cause it may be partialy him and he doesn't want to hear that. I think I will all an endocinologist and see if they can help. if you are one of the men out there try really hard to be understanding and not feel that she doesn't want you because that probably isn't the case she just cant help how she feels and maybe doesn't know why she feels that way pave patients and help her if you can..
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