Dear one of a kind,

i'm sorry to sound so negative, but is your friend really scared of losing your friendship or just wants the sex without the commitment ? It seems strange that he is prepared to have sex with you when it suits him, deserts you for a week or so afterwards and appears again when he wants more. I think you need to look little deeper into his reasons for doing this. Ask yourself if you are truly happy having occcasional sex with this man and that's all. He has told you himself there will be no relationship. You have lot's to think about.

Good luck,

.::suzy::.

It's not like he'll come back around in a week or so for more sex. Just back around again as my normal friend and call, hang out, do things together, etc. The sex thing is an occassional thing that just happens between us every now and again, but I can't take much more of that without feeling more attached to him each time it happens. I just hate to think that i'm a convenient piece of ____, if you know what I mean? He's a real sweet guy and it's not like him to sleep around with anyone that's convenient. Actually, both of us haven't had any relationships in a very long time and I wonder if that's because what we have might be something more than just friends eventually. I'm not happy with the friends and occassional sex thing. I want more. He said he'd want more but he wants to know that what we have as friends won't be ruined. Obviously, it hasn't been ruined yet, so what's the problem? If we continue on with the occassional sex, his avoiding me after for awhile until he feels better again, then coming back around as if all is ok thing, I think i'm going to lose my mind, let alone the friendship!

We've been friends for years, and we'll go several months without hanging out, and when we do, low and behold, poof, it's all physical.

I had to finally come to terms with myself, because I was ready for a relationship, but when it came to this guy, my brain said, "uh, what? You want something with a guy that has stood you up and two days later had sex with you? Uh, no." so that feeling turned off real quick.

He wants to have a casual sex relationship with you, accompanied by the occasional friendly chat.

You have to make up your mind on this one, his mind is made up already. He wants sex and a friendship, nothing more.

Good luck.

Dear one of a kind,

single mom is right. Your friend only wants sex and friendship, otherwise he would have jumped at the chance by now to be with you permanent. You have a lot to think about, it sounds as though you have come to a point in your friendship with this guy where you are ready to go further with a commitment but he is not. If he doesn't want the same thing then you may not be able to accept just being friends anymore. Don't torture yourself like this, be straight with him and let him know what you want, your feelings are just as important as his. You are worth more than this, and you really do deserve to be with a guy who can truly love you, and cherish every moment you are with him and visa versa. There is a very special guy out there waiting to meet you. It's up to you to find him. Your friend does not need you in this way, he is very comfortable having occasional sex, as are many men.

Good luck,

.::suzy::.