the End to My Paper! Please~ Posted: 09-19-04 17:47pm
Kristin and I have my paper almost all
done. Can you help with the ending?
Here's the paper so far:
men’s minds are like filing cabinets, they
take one folder out at a time, while women
are multitaskers and they can look at many
folders while driving and drinking their
coffee. Women are expected to keep the
house clean, raise the kids, and have a
hot supper waiting every night for when
her husband comes home. What men fail to
remember is that while they were at work,
their wife was at work also. She worked
from nine to five then performed all the
duties mentioned above, but if something
is not done right men tend to fly off the
handle and get angry.
I’ve seen this very thing happen in my
own house. My mother will put in a full
day of work, come home, cook supper, get
homework done with the kids, and make sure
the house is clean. My dad comes in from
work and one little thing was not done
right and he goes off whining about how
she “does nothing all day” and “should do
more”. Maybe if he would stop for a
second he would look around and see all
she did do and not what she did not do.
I know pregnant women also get treated
badly because the men do not understand
what it is like to be pregnant. This
woman walks around all day with a huge
stomach and a child moving in there and
yet, when all she wants to do is sit down
at night, she gets accused of being “lazy”
and “not giving her husband the attention
he deserves“. The problem is that men do
not understand the first thing about
pregnancy beyond the point of
conception.
What about mothers who home school? Men
come home from work and the children are
still in their pajamas. What does he
think? He figures they were allowed to
goof off all day and do nothing when
really, his wife was busting her behind to
nourish their minds with what they need in
the real world to succeed. Home schooling
is a full time job. These women not only
kiss their children’s boo boos, but they
are also a teacher who fills their brains
with book smarts.
Whoever said men and women are equal must
have been blind.
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004 Posts: 1739 Location: Houston, Texas
Posted: 09-19-04 18:05pm
I dunno how to help you with th ending,
because i'm not so great at this stuff.
But I thought i'd tell you that its really
good. Good job!
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sweetsuzi
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 11 May 2004 Posts: 831 Location: Bonny Scotland
Posted: 09-19-04 18:12pm
What subject is the essay for, I take it
isnt a personal essay
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Michelle1337
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 04 Aug 2004 Posts: 1739 Location: Houston, Texas
Posted: 09-19-04 18:41pm
You do change between persons a lot
though. The first paragraph your in
third person, the second your in 1st and
then in 3rd again. I dunno if your
teacher is gonna grade that. But its
something I noticed
