Ummm...I gota f in english, well more like a big fat 0 cuz I didnt do sh|t, so I cant help ya there!

I still remember that snowy night that changed my life forever. I was sitting on the cold bathroom floor watching the small white test, waiting for it to determine my future for the rest of my life. This couldn't be happening to me. Sure I was late, but we used protection and it was only my first time. I figured I was probably just stressing over being pregnant. As these thoughts were going through my head, I watched the urine go through the pregnancy test as two thin pink lines appeared across the strip of white. I kept rechecking the box, and soon took another test; this couldn't be happening is all that I could think of at the time. When I saw the two pink lines, I thought I was dreaming. I wanted to wake up form this horrible nightmare.
It's strange how your whole life can change in the matter of seconds. I was always the "jesus freak" girl who preached about not having sex, doing drugs, or being apart of anything close to evil. That night was the night that decided my future for me. Every decision from here on out was not for me anymore, but for the baby growing inside of me. I changed from a hard working girl who accomplished to graduate a year early from high school, and had her whole future planned out; to a girl who was lost and didn't know where she was going, in the matter of seconds.
An hour after taking the test trying to find the best way to tell the father of my child, who was currently my boyfriend, I decided to call him. The things that came out of his mouth are still pierced in my heart! Adam was a young college freshmen whose future was about to take a major detour just like mine. We both decided to get together and to make a decision on what to do about the situation we both had gotten ourselves into.
The next couple of weeks, adam and I went through all of the options. I couldn't have an abortion; I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing that I murdered my own child. Neither of us had the money for that kind of procedure; plus I wasn’t old enough to have an abortion. The two options it came down to in the end was adoption or the choice of keeping the baby. Either way we had to inform our parents, we just didn't know when or how to tell them.
After days of throwing up, tender breasts, not being able to eat anything, smell anything, and dealing with stomach pains. It was finally happened. No more hiding all the piles of pregnancy books, or the $6.99 prenatal vitamins from wal-mart, since I had no way of visiting a doctor. My parents took it better than I thought they would, so did adam's parents! The only downfall was in both of our parents eyes, each of us were the enemies for the longest time. They tried to tear us apart for months. Our bond with each other and the baby was too strong for any one including our parents, to come between the three of us.

The drama was horrible! I took everyone’s rude comments and remarks really hard, but the worst of things was to come. I was living drama filled days from the time I dragged myself out of bed in the morning, till the time I cried myself to sleep at night. I was around sixteen weeks pregnant and still hadn't seen a doctor. I was doing all I could by reading my pregnancy books, taking my prenatal vitamins.
Overtime things started to cool down even though our parents still weren't fond of neither adam nor me. My dad was just beginning to be excited to become a grandpa. My mom was even starting to take me out shopping for maternity clothes and things that I was going to need for the baby. Adam and I were getting along wonderfully and grew more together when people just thought we were going to grow apart. Instead of the rude comments, everyone was excited for the baby to come into this world, which made me a lot happier. Just as things were starting to turn around, some more dark clouds decided to pass by.
I had a doctors appointment scheduled for the beginning of april. A couple of days before my appointment I started to have some light bleeding that just got worse over the next two days. I was slightly scared but I read that bleeding was extremely common for young pregnant girls in the first and second trimesters. I wasn't worried until the night before my doctor’s appointment. I let my tears flow that whole night, until I fell asleep. I knew something was wrong with the baby, I think it was just my mother instinct that was coming through. I tried so stay strong, I really did! It seemed that the stronger I tried to be, the more pain I felt.
The morning I went to my appointment with adam. I walked into that hospital room and knew the words that were going to come out of the doctor’s mouth before I even entered. The doctor started taking tests and reading monitors. I glanced up at her and saw the look in her eyes. I knew she was just thinking of a way to tell me that my baby was no longer alive. I looked directly into my doctors eyes, as tears starting flowing down my cheeks. She told me, that I had unfortunately miscarried, and there was nothing she could do. The baby was completely gone and so was huge part of myself. I sat there in shock and felt the same cold chills; just like I did on that cold bathroom floor the night I first found out I was pregnant.
Somewhere along the line something messed up, i'm not sure how or why....But it did. I wanted to blame my parents and adam's parents for putting me through months of stressful hell! Then I began to blame myself for not going to the hospital right away or telling my parents sooner. Right now, in this very moment in time, I don't blame anyone. I would give anything to have those nights of rubbing my belly, feeling my unborn child move like a fluttering butterfly and talking about the day we would meet.
It still hurts so incredibly much and probably always will; knowing that I once had this precious life inside of me, whom I loved with everything within me! God, for some unexplainable reason, had taken my baby away from me. I think of what I could have done for my child to be in my arms this very day. I realize that I can't go back. I still and always will consider my unborn child, my first child. Maybe I didn't get to hold my baby in my arms, but I did something better than that. By holding my baby in my heart from the day I found out until the day I die.
We all know how to laugh, how to cry, how to be held tight. We all know heart break; but ultimately it’s what we go through in our lives that make us who we are. I know that I would be no where near the person I am today without going through this heartbreaking experience. For whatever reason god put me through it, I am still very grateful that he did. I've realized the experiences that we tend to go through in life makes us realize how beautiful life can really be.

Hun that doesn't need editing. Its perfect.

Like grammar errors or punctuation spelling..Anything.

Can anyone think of a title for this paper?

Ok, here's my conservative edit. Basically I just changed spelling, runons, sentence fragments, punctuation, and _limited_ grammar. This essay is very much written in spoken english, and not written english. How tough is your teacher? I could edit it some more to get it closer to proper written english, but you might think it sounds old fashioned.

Here's a full out edit.

Hey, my boyfriend came over and just reminded me that it was only suppost to be a one page essay and turned out to be 5 pages...When double spaced. Grr!! It took me like 30 minutes to write, but if I take things out you only get half the story oh well maybe I will just start all over with some other experience. I guess we will see.

Erin-
thank you so much for all the editting!!

Screw it. Just hand in a 5 page... Unless your teacher specifically said no longer than 1 page, im sure they wont care if you hand in 5... Usually they mean it has to be at least 1 page, and all they are expecting is 1 page... Lol I dunno, I guess it all depends on how your teacher is though. Wow, I think you should hand in the whole thing. Its awesome!

Awww thank you! I wish I could, its hard to take stuff out because every detail really makes the paper.