Limericks

There once was a man on lamictal
whose dilemma still gives me a tickle
this may sound a bit corny
but it made him quite horny
he was 98, though. What a pickle!

On topamax I was forgetful
which made me so anxious and fretful
as my word recall shrunk
my vocabulary stunk
i soon switched meds (as I was regretful)

I find that I must wink one eye
when my tegretol level gets high
i know i'm in trouble
when I start to see double
and I walk like i've had a mai tai

Depakote caused me many sad frowns
as it made me gain 23 pounds
soon wearing a large
i felt big as a barge
for the scale would never go down

On neurontin, I gained some more weight
people asked me, "when is your due date?"
for I saw my weight jump
and my torso got plump
sigh! I'll never again see size eight

A beginner in auto mechanics
was experiencing tension and panics
for the laddie would fear
cars would shift out of gear
so his doctor prescribed him some xanax

now xanax can be habit forming
and the lads doc was so misinforming
he took more than he ought
and the plight that this brought
was at work, for he wasn't performing

aye, the med made this laddie so tired
that in april, the poor boy was fired
his recall was quite blurred
as to what had occurred
and just how his dilemma transpired

there once was a boy good with gadgets
but his story, alas, it was tragic
too late he discerned
but the lesson he learned
is that no med has wonders like magic