I am a man of 39 in his second marriage with four step children the youngest of which is 14yrs and two of my own with my first wife. We, my step family and I live together and I see my own children once a fortnight and about 10 days a year. My kids used to come over and stay every fortnight at weekends and now because my wife does not get on with my kids, mine are 12 and 6. I only see them once a fortnight with no stay over.

I have just started a business and involved the step kids as much as possible particularly the eldest. He is 18 nearly 19 and his interest seems to be waning. This I can understand but he can not be bothered to get out of bed and do anything. My wife won’t kick him out or make him find a job. The deal was originally that he would work about 7hrs a day on the site in return for use of her car and free board. Then if the business was a success he would be free to buy his own property or car. But he’s just not putting in the hours he just sees his girlfriend and generally dosses.

I am working up to 18 hrs a day and feel that a bit of support from my wife is essential. I have made sacrifices regarding my own kids yet she will not do anything regarding hers which causes me to think, well what the hell, nobody else in this household is interested in making a success of this business why should I and I want to start going to the pub etc…

when we first got married she was working and two months later she gave it up for reasons that she said was pressure, sales targets etc. But she could easily help out on the internet business we have started, but she says she has too much to do around the house.

All this is getting me stressed and short tempered. I think I am getting paranoid that they are just are just sponging off of me though I am sure we were very much in love when we got married. We live in a very nice house have a very nice car. But even though my job is good, I hate it. I always wonder whats going on at home. And then i’m so angry because nothing much has been done, on the business, I just want to go out myself, with my wife. I am good at my job, but I just hate it now, but I think I know changing jobs is not the answer. My boss is great. Hes laid back and lets me do what I want to. I’m bored at work, worry whats happening at home and when I am at work and when I get arrive home I do not won’t to be in any more because I think everyone should be pulling together towards the family business.

I just do not know what to do. I also wanna see my kids more but I know that causes problems I just do not know what to do. When I wake up in the morning I know exactly what will happen a boring day a work doing what I want, getting good money,
get home from work, work on the business enthusiastically then get cheesed off when I find out that not a lots been done. Then when I say lets go out my wife will say we can’t afford it.

Could this be just a mid life crisis or something more serious like paranoia, its getting me down angry and stressed, it even makes me have the "occasional" spliff.

I also feel that whats the point. There must be more to life