I have bad social phobia. I don't have friends, I don't go to stores, I don't go to restaurants. I only go to only one store right now. I usually buy things that I want online or I have my parents get it for me. I've been very shy all my life and I won't talk to people. I'm taking medications for anxiety, but they don't work that good. I talk a lot at home. I used to go to restaurants when I was younger, but not anymore. The last time I went to restaurant was 3 years ago. That didn't make me less shy when I was going to restaurants though. I've even tried to kill myself because I had social phobia. I see a counselor and a doctor and I can talk to them, but not to anybody else. Can anybody help?
Last edited by Imstillalive on August 16th, 2004 08:00 PM; edited 1 time in total
What the other author said about diet and exercise . Sugar makes us more emotional so if you are depressed it can and will deepen your depression kinda like alchohol ! Also, if you can try two walk for 30 minutes / day . This can bring you out of a depression ! It 's really not any joke . And, the foods we eat every day have more to do with the way we feel every day than any pill you will ever take . Also, get rid of anything around the house that gets you anxious . And, last but definitely not least you 've got to get into a church counselor ! You know, do something to help one of your neighbors just this un thing alone will lift you up in no time ! Try any and all of these first and then think about getting on a mild mood elevator or antianxiety or maybe an antidepressant . If you have a doc call him tomorrow and communicate with him tune into him . Not us ! And, working out with weights every day will get your hormones such as human growth hormone which will help you with wonderful things like getting a good night 's sleep ! Hope you have a great day, god bless ! Ps exercise will increase or elevate your mood because your own body will start secreting endorphins !
Chances are the root of your problems are caused by the inaccurate way you have learned to look at things. Have you tried getting involved in a cbt? Cbt is not like other talk therapy. A good cbt therapist does not care much about your past or why you think you feel the way you do etc. A good cbt therapist knows they cannot change what's already happened to you but they can help you change how you deal with what happens in your life from here on out. It's all about using the tools to learn to think more clearly and accurately about things and once you do your depression will miraculously begin to lift before your eyes. My favorite starter book on cbt is "been there, done that? Do this! By sam obitz and many universities offer cbt programs for little or no charge. It's the best stress reducer around and once you learn the tools they are with you wherever you go :d
Read all of the advice above & start taking it, but don't do it all at once, take "baby" steps do one thing till you feel bit comfortable & then try the next thing.
Changing diet, doing some exercises - can be done together & at home so you will be more likely to feel comfortable about these & so the results are more likely to happen faster.
Doing a cbt course might be abit threatening but you could get the book & start learning the skills & then attend a course later if you still need to.
Keep seeing your dr & counsellor but I personally wouldn't add another counsellor (church or whatever)as sometimes counsellors give differing advice whch could just confuse you.
You do need to widen your circle of contacts/friends - there are numerous forums on line (yahoo, msn, icq, netfriendships etc) where you can join interest groups & chat either in real time or via emails etc but this might help build up your social skills & faith in yourself as well as making some friends who may live near enough to you so that when you are ready you could get together.
I was wondering why everybody thought I was depressed. When I acually had lots of anxiety. I found out that I made a mistake on my subject. I put sucide attempts, but I meant to put social phobia. Sorry for the inconvenience, but thanks for the advise, because sometimes I feel depressed.
If you try to kill yourself then you are obviously depressed. People with just anxiety and social phobia are not going to take their own lives. Anxiety/social phobia/ depression go hand in hand. Just because you don't feel sad does not mean that you are not depressed.
With that level of social phobia you're kidding yourself but no-one else if you think you're not depressed - the sooner you face reality the sooner you can really start dealing with your problems all the counsellors in the world can not help if you aren't even able to be honest with yourself!!
Ok im going to make some confessions and ask for some advice.. (remember im a lil kid so sure this'll sound childlike) I was supposed to be home at midnight and didn't come home at all.. I really couldn't I was stranded but I already know it is my fault. When I came home my step dad yelled at me and called me names and whatever it made me really upset and scared, this has happened before, but when I cried I cuoldn't control my breathing and I couldn't see anything and all my muscles in my throat and my arms and hands got so tight I couldn't even feel them anymore, and my stomach too, and my legs sort of. This happened before but not as bad, I know that I have problems with 'men' and I know that I am stressed and have anxiety but what was that that happened to me does anyone know, I would just like to know what's going on with me. Sorry for making this so long, but I appreciate you taking time to read it
Well, I honestly cannot tell you what it is or what if anything is wrong with you. However, when I was a teenager I was the same way. When I got upset, boy did I get upset. If I was mad, I was so mad that I honestly thought myself capable of homicide. If I was upset(sad) I would cry and hyperventilate and feel like I was going to die.
However, now that I am older I got that under control. But, I now know that I have been suffering depression/anxiety among other things. So maybe you have one or both, or maybe you are just young and your emotions are in overdrive.
I like the second one better, about emotions in overdrive. That one puts my mind at eeze about myself. This is the first time i've really come out and said anything about anything with what's in my head or problems I have. So thank you for helping
As you said you a) have problems with "men" & b) knew that not getting home was your fault so you were already (before you hot home) very uptight & stressed so like hot said - emotions went into overdrive you &/or your emotions started to hyperventilate & your muscles spasmed.
Pretty reasonable - solutions!!!! A) avoid getting "stuck" in a situation (like not being able to get home) that will cause you to get into trouble & feel stressed & guilty etc & b) seek help from a counsellor about the issues you have with "men" .
Men make up about half the population of the world so they're pretty hard to avoid so if you have issues with them you need to deal with them.
Cbt (cognitive behaviour therapy) might help - but it really depends on the depth & nature of the issues you have & whethre they're in the past or on-going!!
i know how it feels to be extremely shy. I was like that at one time and I do believe that your case could be a depression problem as well as a social problem. I also have a friend who is exactly like you as far as not going anywhere. She lived her life for over fourty years like that until she got help. My suggestion is go see your counsler or someone that deals with phobias and tell them everything you've told us. This is no way to live your life so make your life the way you want to live it by taking good care of yourself. I wish you the best of luck!
God bless you!