Teen Pregnancy Forum - What Should I Do?!? Need Help Asap Tonight

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Q: What Should I Do?!? Need Help Asap Tonight

asked by: shortyandnoodle on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Ok heres the situation...I have to go to work tomorrow at 7am but like I posted before this today heather is 1-2cm dialated. The dilema is that no one is home during the day at heathers where she has to stay from now on and I have to go 2 hours back home to go to work. She really wants me to stay and idk what to do cause if I call in again I will get fired which isnt such a bad thing because I can get unemployment which I know I shouldnt count on but I also have been applying for differnt jobs and whatnot. So really when heather goes into labor I would have to drive 2 hours to take her to the hospital which could even be tonight or somthing and the stupid part is that I have off from this friday til next tuesday because I told my work back in febuary that I was going on vacation for my birthday which is on the 16th Smile

. So I wouldnt be able to come back til about 6pm on thursady and alot can happen before that with being this far along already. So really what im asking is should I stay or should I go?? I really dont know what to do cause my job is important to me but I really hate it so it wouldnt really suck if I got fired but then again we do need the money for hospital bills. My mom already knows that there is a chance I might get fired soon after I got sent home from work last time and she said if that does happen that shed help me out with all my payments and stuff for a lil while til I got a new job. I really dont want to leave heather all alone as she already today has been having contrations on and off. So if someone caould give me there opinion on this I would really really really appreciate it I just need an outsider to evaluate whats going on here...I almost forgot here at heathers house they dont turn on there a/c and its like 90 and humid and I know that can bring labor on and she also is forced to be doing chores by her mom which non stop movement cant be to good I just want her to rest but her mom is all in our face about cleaning the damn house and doing laundry while shes at work so idk..Thanks for reading this long thing -ryan heather and mackenzie

Replies(20)

noodleandshorty

replied on August 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

~bump
7 people look and no replys yet??!? Please somone tell me what you think cause time is runnin out I gotta go back tonight if im gonna go and the lastest I wanna leave is 8pm so I at least get 7 hours sleep -ryan heather & mackenzie
btw sorry I forgot I was on heathers name this is ryan lol

newlife

replied on August 9th, 2004

Active User, very eHealthy

Go to work. Heather can call an ambulance to go to the hospital and call you when she gets there. If you call in and get fired you won't get unemployment cuz they'll say that they have just cause to fire you, for not coming to work, esp, if heather doesn't got tonight.

preggofriend

replied on August 9th, 2004

New User

Go to Work

I agree, you will not get unemployment unless you are relieved for cause and it will not start for a while anyways (if you get it). Go to work, but make sure she calls you periodically on cell phone to give updates. You cannot risk getting fired at this point, regardless of what mom says with money. And this is a time of a lot of false labor. You seem like a loving partner to her but you must think of the consequences of not going and getting fired and then being stuck as a new father and no job to support your two women in your life. Lots of cell phone updates will ease your fears...Wait until friday, when you're off and then evaluate it then! Good luck!

shortyandnoodle

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Yea but my work understood that I had to go to the hospital last time we went there and I had to have a meeting about it and they said I am lucky I wasent "terminated" and if I leave again for no reason that I will be fired which is bull because its for my own damn baby thats what im sayin and I think they would say they had to fire me for insabordanance(sp?) but I can fight that cause its not right if I have to go to the hospital with her am I right? They cant do that... I can call into work but its all up to them but I will tell them I wont be there because I have to go to the hospital again with heather then when we go which should be in the next week if they try to contest it at least I have a dr note and stuff but either way I hate my job period lol thats not an excuse I know but its just so hard I want to be with heather then again I would be working by her right now and gotten transfrred if I had a place ot live but I cant live with my own fiance and daughter because her stubborn mother wont let me move in and says my "little mommy" can pay for an appt...Nice. But either way idk what to do still

shortyandnoodle

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Re: Go to Work

preggofriend wrote:

i agree, you will not get unemployment unless you are relieved for cause and it will not start for a while anyways (if you get it). Go to work, but make sure she calls you periodically on cell phone to give updates. You cannot risk getting fired at this point, regardless of what mom says with money. And this is a time of a lot of false labor. You seem like a loving partner to her but you must think of the consequences of not going and getting fired and then being stuck as a new father and no job to support your two women in your life. Lots of cell phone updates will ease your fears...Wait until friday, when you're off and then evaluate it then! Good luck!

ok that would totally work except for the fact that we are not allowed to carry cellphones at work no matter what I already got into an argument with my manager about that because my phone rang right in front of her and she told me if I answered it I would be fired lol and also if im working and the cameras see me on my phone I will deff get fired because its against policy also my other thing I do is go to the bathroom alot to call or text message heather on her phone but lately theve been catching on and hanging out outside the door to see if im talking on the phone and its really just $hitty

lilmama2b_oct04

replied on August 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

I think you should go into work. You dont need to risk loosing your job when heather is just about to pop. Remember how hard it is to get a job out here? You may be jobless for a couple months, and trust me, even if you were to get unemployment, its like nothing. Seriously, you'll get like $120(give or take some) and thats it. Heather may not even go into labor for a couple weeks. I remember chrissy lost her mucus plug and was dialating and everything and she was pregnant for awhile afterwards. I thought she was never gonna pop... Look at how long shauna was having them contractions for.... The possiblilty of heather going into labor before thursday is not worth the risk of loosing your job. If she does go into labor, she might not even have to go to the hospital right away, you may even have time to get down by her. If her labor progresses fast, then she can call the ambulance and call you and tell you to come down. Everything will be ok! I have a feeling that mackenzie is gonna wait til this weekend though Wink

MegEve

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Ok, I know you need to be with heather, and if you are willing to lose your job over it, that is okay. But even if she has already had the baby, that vacation time you have needs to be spent looking for a job!!! I know it is hard right now, but think about when the baby is here. I don't know if you have everything, but I know my friends who have had babies thought they did and found out when the baby was born that there was so much more they needed. I don't want to tell you what to do, but I do want you and heather to be happy. You are the man of the house, so what ever happens, you need to be the one that handles it. Please don't think I am being mean, but just think things through realy well, and don't jump to conclusions. Good luck, and I can't wait to see .Miss .Mack!!

Oh, and be careful driving!!

Love,
megan

littlehunybunny

replied on August 9th, 2004

Active User, very eHealthy

Aww, I feel for you ryan, I am kind of stuck with telling you to go to work, and knowing how I would want my bf to stay. Really, your jobs is important, but also its not good that she isn't resting like she should! It is true she can call 911, and you will still have your job. I don't know.. Sad

maybe you can stay with her till you have to leave for work, and just leave early?? Thats up to you on how you feel about it, but really I think you should go to work eather way. Good luck desiding.

Stacey

preggofriend

replied on August 9th, 2004

New User

Agree

It sounds like your work place is looking for a reason to terminate you. The cell phone thing will just give them cause and put it over the top. Do you get breaks or can you call from the company phone every two hours or so? I know your heart is in exactly the right place and from one guy to another that's cool to see...But jobs are tought to get right now anywhere in any field and mackenzie and heather need you working, even if it's in a sweat shop 12 hours a day. I can see both sides of the arguement but rest assured that noodle with a shiity job right now is better than noodle with no job at all! Good luck!

preggofriend

replied on August 9th, 2004

New User

Work

I agree, leave her as late as possible without having to drive 100 mph to get to work and get back as soon as you can right after, calling and talking to her on the way and on the way home. And happy birthday (maybe you'll have another one to celebrate on the same day!)

shortyandnoodle

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

I like the way miss mack sounds thats funny lol but anyway thanks for all the input so fast now after no one was replying I understand that I need to keep my job but what makes it so hard to decide is that if I go to work and leave to go to the hospital again my job is still at risk but I guess that is a risk I will have to take. I would have to leave at like 430am tommaro in order to get to work on time I dont think that would work considering its hard enough to get sleep around here due to loud people being in livingroom and her brother has a friend sleeping over tonight and the retards that live upstairs are always loud and like to vaccum at 1 in the morning lol also they like to play basketball at like 11pm and they dont stop even when politly asked. I suppose I have to go to work though cause its best and hopfully I pray to god that she can hold off until im here on thursday afternoon!! Everyone please pray tonight with me lol I really dont want her to go into labor without me because shes scared and will be by herself and I dont want to leave her every time I talk about it she starts crying because we always thought id be with her throughout this and not be caught up at stupid work or anywhere else idk I just feel bad seeing her cry and I really dont want to leave her...

preggofriend

replied on August 9th, 2004

New User

Good Luck

You obviously have a big heart and a powerful love for your two women. And they know that! That's awesome!

MegEve

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Awww, you just need to hold heather and help her calm down. Just try to get her relaxed b/c she could go into labor as a result. Tell her everything will work out b/c .I.T .W.I.L.L!!!! Please keep us updated on how heather fells and also yourself!

Love,
megan

shortyandnoodle

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

Thanks for the support meg, heather is also very emotional now if yall didnt read my mucus plug one she was crying lastnight also about her dog dying when it isnt dying she just thought theres a possiability or somthing idk??? Lol but im deff trying to comfort her but she keeps telling me somthing doesnt feel right and thinking that tonight or tommaro morning shes going to go into labor idk I guess we will find out with time

Kia

replied on August 9th, 2004

Supporter

Woah, don't you guys get like paternity leave and "reasonable time off" for childbirth and infant illness??? That's cr*p.
Goodness if they tired that here in uk they would have a lawsuit against them for unfair dismissal (add in loss of earnings, compensation for stress to self, mother and baby and a whole host of other things).
Good luck and do what feels right. I know I would feel resentfull if himself wasn't here when things started happening.
If heather is dilating I would expect things are happening but will either progress real slow, or by the time you read this mackenzie will be on her way.
Don't make heather resent you at this early stage, it'll be bad enough when she is screaming at you that its all your fault for ever daring to come near her with a willy Wink

I know a lot of focus is on how difficultthings are for the mother but you as the father need to let a lot go over your head and to not take any personal offence - humans are notorious for lashing out at their nearest and dearest - why? Because their nearest and dearest will forgive them and not be offended.
A job is for as long as you decide - a child is forever Smile

tweety12986

replied on August 9th, 2004

Active User, very eHealthy

Ok this may sound stupid comapared to everyone else but I say heather can go at any moment, and destiny my friend went to the hospital in an ambulance and that is a 3,000 dollar ride!!! Is there anyway they can change your vacation days around for u. And the reason I say go I think they'll understand... I am pretty sure they dont want that on their conscience... His baby being born at home or something.
Meagan

shortyandnoodle

replied on August 9th, 2004

Experienced User

I never thought of the ambulance ride but if I am gone and heather goes into labor I think for the most part she will tough it out for a couple hours til I get down back by her and then she will go with me into the hospital. They wont change my vacation days around for me either because policy is once yer on the schedule you have to trade with somone to get the day off and no one can have overtime and or 40 hours or its a "coaching" that leads to termination and we have no more part time assosiates anymore cause they all quit or got fired, everyone already has 40 hour weeks because of the fact that 2 guys just quit out of no where and we were all screwed in to working shorthanded and anyone who trys to call in gets there a$$ chewed there all screwy like that, I mean they just hired two guys that are on that program where you get out of jail to be at work and thats really safe to be working with somone who has 8 counts of battery and assault or so he says. But I think im just gonna go home and pray for the best and she cant come with me for these 3 days cause her mom wont let her cause heather had to tell her after I told her to keep it to us so in case she had to do somthing like this she could but now were screwed there too so I guess were just s.O.L. On this one and have to play it out as it comes

PregnaJordan

replied on August 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

How lng have u been workin there...U have to work a good long while to get unemploymnt...I say stay w/ her an leave at 430--get used to sleepless nights..Lol, many to come...Oh an see about gettina "daddy" pager...Put it inside ur pants on vibrate--they'll never kno...

noodleandshorty

replied on August 9th, 2004

Extremely eHealthy

Well ryan just left to go home Sad

I still dont want him to leave but I gotta deal with it I guess. For some reason I just didnt want him to go home tonight, I couldnt stop crying. I wanna cry right now but im tryin not too. I havent been feeling good at all today and I guess I just wanted him to stay with me, but I cant be stubborn and make him stay away from work...But just lettin yall know he went home but will be back thursday.
~heather ryan and mackenzie
p.S. He is determined we are gonna have her thursday or friday the 13th..Which is also a weird thing because this weekend is ozzfest lol.

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