I have been 'dating' this guy for about 3
months.
We both work for different companies but
we are 'sister companies'. My company
owns the one he works in.
Anyway - at first there were so many
emails and just regular conversations
getting to know eachother.
We went out once as 'friends' and then the
next one started our 'affair'. I was with
my now ex
when we hooked up and he knew it but I was
breaking it off and he was saying to me
sweet things like
i am worth waiting for etc..He put in so
much effort and said thing like 'cannot
wait unitl I can
have you to myself'. As soon as he was
able to..It seemed his feelings left
too.
He stopped emailing me much and was alwasy
too busy. He was too busy to see me, to
call me..Anything. He
always has excuses. He would show up late
all the time when we actually did meet
which was like twice a week to once a week
to
now every other week. He goes on abot how
much time he has to put into working (is
true) and sailing
and he has no time for even friends and
family. He asked me to be patient. He
says he really digs me and is interested
in more than just the sex (which is now
all we do). I heard rumors of him
sleeping with another coworker
which he says are just rumors. He always
seems so appologetic or kinda 'broken'
when he answers
my questions about what's going on. And
he never calls me. Its always text or
email and I barely ever hear
from him on the weekends. If I do at all.
Every time I bring up that i'm only his
good time girl
and he treats me like it and he has no
time for me and he's making all these
excuses, he denies
and usually sweet talks through them
all.
I just need some advise. If you need more
details or have questions, please
ask...I'm trying to figure this out.
Or at least the perspective of some one
going through it too or have.
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2ferano
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Dec 2003 Posts: 3717
Posted: 08-05-04 18:08pm
Sounds to me like he just wanted you
because you were taken, but now that you
are his, he doesn't want you.
Drop his sorry ass. He is not worth it
and I bet he is sleeping with that other
coworker.
You can do better than that@!
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minerwater522
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jul 2004 Posts: 23 Location: TDot
Posted: 08-06-04 16:20pm
I know.I just really like him and he never
seems unbelieveable.
I'm a sorry case..
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2ferano
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 23 Dec 2003 Posts: 3717
Posted: 08-06-04 20:54pm
I don't mean to sound cruel. He just
sounds like he is good at what he does,
but you really need to lose him. You can
do a lot better.
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JanetBee
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 28 Apr 2004 Posts: 332
Posted: 08-08-04 14:38pm
Is he using you? Well, that would only be
if he doesn't actually care about you or
even particularly fancy you. If he just
likes having sex with you, that's not
actually "using" you. (it's sort of like
a girl meets a guy who goes to great
parties, for example -- she might have sex
with him, so that he takes her to the
parties, i.E. She would be using him!) so
just because he is only interested in the
sex and not the social side, doesn't mean
he's using you, maybe he just thinks the
sex is great but isn't into more of a
relationship.
But if you want more than that, and it
isn't available, then unless the sex is
good enough to make that side of it
worthwhile on its own, you probably need
to think about cutting this one loose!
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minerwater522
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 20 Jul 2004 Posts: 23 Location: TDot
Posted: 08-09-04 16:50pm
He admited to me today that he was seeing
another girl.
We are going to talk this week.
We weren't commited and I told him he can
date whom ever he'd like, just not another
girl at work!!
Hey I know its late (the post) just
wondering how it went your
from t.O.Im in burlington we are
neighbours. Any way I hope you found
someone who is into you and you are
happier
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janeysuz
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Jun 2005 Posts: 79 Location: neworleans
Hi Posted: 07-04-05 18:35pm
Feel really bad for you sorry
you knew all the answers, go back and read
your first letter
i hope you realize you can trust yourself
more than you do!
You are really smart about yourself, just
be courageous enough to do the right thing
by it!
When a man treats you right, takes you
out, loves you to pieces, adores your very
footsteps, gazes into your eyes longingly,
brings you surprises, takes time to be
with you, pets your head, gives back
massages, doesn't mind doing your laundry
(and you'll reciprocate all of this) and
he's some one admirable that you truly
respect and has good character...That's
love, you know it when you have it, you
know it's not when it's not
there's a great old movie called
"groundhog day", and though it may seem
irrelevant, andie macdowell plays this
part that won't let bill murray get with
her until he's right with the universe,
until she knows he's a good person, until
that time she just slaps his face, to me
she's my ideal! I have a great man, and
man he treats me so great and special and
right I am almost ashamed of all of my
past relationships, what was I doing???
I tell you what, I was doing all I knew at
that point, and I didn't have good
advice...But in your case you don't really
need advice you just need to know you're
worth the best (you are) and it's better
to have your dignity and be alone than be
mistreated, and have faith that good
things will come to you (they shall)
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lilmammi
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Aug 2005 Posts: 34 Location: ohio
Re: Is He Using Me? Posted: 08-07-05 13:33pm
I know exactly how u feel...My b/f now it
seems were going through the same
thing..Only we have been together for 3
years....And now I live with him and his
famil,,but even though im here I have to
go to another part of the house just to
find him..I have to beg him to spend time
with me or even just to go some where...He
usually is on the computer talking to
other females or he is on the phone with
unknown females who he calls his "friends"
but on the other hand alot of the girls
that call here I have never heard him
speak of. And recently there have been a
lot more of them. And when I ask him
about these things he just sweet talks his
way out of them also. Not only that but
the only time he spends with me if when he
wants to have sex..And he doesnt say it
but I know,,cause thats what it always
leads up to. Just once id like for us to
jst watch a movie and cuddle with out
having sex. Alotta of the time I think he
is using me..He says he loves me and all
the this...But he loves to talk about
other women and for me to just get a
compliment I have to ask how do I look and
he just nods,,but he'll look at some one
and be like damn she is cute or
somthing...And this really hurts my
feelings. But I mean im kind of going
through what u are...Just in a much deeper
way. So it does seem like he is playing u
and it's best if u stop it now or you'll
end up like me...Depressed and wanting
leave.
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sandyallen
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 02 Feb 2004 Posts: 4580
Posted: 08-07-05 16:13pm
Haven't you heard men have a thing called
ego, it is all about them, do not get me
wrong, I am not saying all of them are
bad, it took me three marriages and then I
found a good one and I do realize that
their are a lot of women that are just as
bad as men.
Something happens in our lives, or we get
lonely or we are swept off our feet
because we feel this certain guy is mr.
Right (sometimes a joke), or sometimes we
feel sorry for this guy or feel that we
can change this certain someone and a lot
of times it explodes in our face, so we
sit there and take it and they make us
feel so low and that we caannot get
anybetter than them instead of getting the
heck out of the relationship, moving on,
taking a break. Their are times that it
is nobody elses fault but our own. The
part I really like is when they say that
they will change, I always feel like
saying what, your underwear, no, some do
but most only change for @ the max, 3
weeks tops and you are always wondering
when they will change back. Another
thing I see in most relationships going
wrong wrong is lack of communication.
Good luck to all relationships!
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lilmammi
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Aug 2005 Posts: 34 Location: ohio
Posted: 08-10-05 16:31pm
[quote=" that is sooo true I try to talk
to my b/f but he just tries to ignore me
or he'll start to get really angry so I
try to walk away so we both can calm down
so that we can talk about the situation
like adult..But he gets mad when I walk
away....
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Banger
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 8
Posted: 08-11-05 01:52am
Wow get out of this. I once dated a
loser just like this guy and trust me
you'll be happier when you're too busy
with your own life to care about his busy
life. And go out and get the book he's
just not that into you, not because of
what the title says but because I can tell
you're too good for this no-gooder and by
reading the book you can avoid all the
potential loser types out there who are
always lurking about for the next victim.
your
from t.O.Im in burlington we are
neighbours. Any way I hope you found
someone who is into you and you are
happier 
