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September 25th, 2003
Sad I am a very stressed and stessful person. I am 19 years old and married. I am in the military which was a wrong choice for me. I love my husband but he has a child from a previous marriage ( she died from heart and child birth problems) and he now we take care of his mother. I have always hated kids and thought I would get over it because I love him so much. I thought I would have been able to change. So my undue stress comes from his daughter and his mother who I hate and from the fact of being in the military. There are some others strings with these problems but i'll give it to you short and sweet. My big problem is my husband wants another child and I don't mind giving him one but as you can read I an stressed to much that I think it has affected my body. Along with the fact I hate kids, I think this will help me to change my attitude towards his child and all the other things I hate. Help, what should I do?
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rawkeze
replied September 25th, 2003
Hate is such a strong word, maybe you don't hate kids, but just feel better when they're not around. It doesn't seem like you have discussed this with your husband, you should start there. You're young and have a lifetime to hate. Talk with a psychologist, sounds like you are depressed. If you don't want to have children, then don't. The fact that your husband wants another child is a good indication he doesn't know how you are feeling. Take your time.
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ga_peach02
replied September 26th, 2003
I have talked to my husband about what I am feeling and he knows exactly how I feel about everything, but I think I put him into a situation to where he cannot provide me with a solution. I guess you could say I don't hate kids but I would the problem is I don't want to be around kids. I wouldn't say i'm depressed although sometimes I do feel a little low. I want to have children but the fact that it's not happening for me cause me to be stressed along with some other problems. I would like to talk to someone to see if it would make things better but I am not sure of how to do that. I am only now trying to take it day by day.
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Cindy1
replied September 26th, 2003
I'm not sure how anyone can "hate" kids, as they are an innocent party here but anyways, about the stress thing, have you tried anti depressants yet ? You really need to get some medical advice if it's out of your control. Breathing excercises are wonderful to.
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ga_peach02
replied September 29th, 2003
Sometimes it is the child's fault but only in certain people eyes. As for an anti depressant, I have tried but I didn't like to way it made me feel so I discontinued them. I am in the process of finding help to deal with the stress and depression. I am open to any suggestions as a way to deal. Thanks
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stressedout
replied September 29th, 2003
Hi, isn't there something available through the military? Like counselling or medical advice. I know here in canada I had some friends in the navy and they had a Dr. And a chaplain on the base that they could talk to. Do you have anything like that? I hope that you can wait until you have some of this stuff figured out before you have a baby. Believe me, having a baby won't make your life any easier.
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ga_peach02
replied September 30th, 2003
Being in the military doesn't mean they tell you everything. I have to run a few people down to get any information and that's the process i'm in now. I feel stupid because I feel I am in a rush to solve my problems which just cause more issues later. But i'm doing my part.
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