I can't even begin to understand how you feel from this happening to you. However, I am not writing this reply out of pity. I am writing this to let you know that it can happen to anyone.... Trust me, I know, as it has happened to me.
I am an extremely fit and healthy 23 year old male, and last january, my life was almost devastated upon being admitted to the emergency room of my local hospital. I thought I had the flu, and being the tough (stupid?) guy that I am, I just tried to fight it off and continue with my normal life. Unfortunately, my normal life was training to become a firefighter, and that entails some very hard work. I went from being in the best shape of my life, to suddenly, not even being able to walk and talk at the same time without having difficulty breathing. I took a few days off, and when I thought I was better (from the flu, remember?) I tried to go back to training. When I passed out in the middle of my step-mother's hallway early one morning, she had seen enough and the next thing I knew, I was being sent to the hospital, and I still didn't konw why.
After spending some 3 weeks in the cardiac unit, I wazs finally let out and went home. Unfortunately, I was forced to stop my schooling, I had to stop work, in fact, I had to stop everything. My breakfast consisted of about 5 different medications, and my after dinner dessert was much the same.
It has now been just about 6 months since then, and I have just started work again about a month ago.
As far as I know, this was a very difficult thing for anyone to diagnos. They found it in me after 3 days of keeping me in the hospital cardiac ward, and the only reason they wouldn't let me out was because my heart rate was 185 resting, and no one knew why. Jsut as a frame of reference, my resting heart rate was normally between 50-55 bpm as I run (or did) everyday. After 5 months of not doing anything, I am just now getting clearence to resume some activities, like work, light wieght training, and walking, but no running.
I want you to know that when I read your post, I felt the tears welling up in my eyes, because I know that it could've just as easily been me that didnt' make it. The only solace I can offer is that god really does do everything for a reason. While you may not see it now, and you probably won't see it for a number of years to come, he really does have a plan for everyone one of us. Six months ago, I would've thought that what I jsut said was bull, but after being through an ordeal like that (and, honestly I am still going through it) I can truly say and mean it.
I'm sure that you would've taken this away from your wife, and taken it upon yourself, but it was not meant to be. I am sorry about your wife. This disease shouldn't have to affect anyone the way it does, but trust in god, and have faith in his plan. Your children are lucky in that they have a man who is, no doubt, a wonderful father, and while it will be hard on them, it will be harder on you. My mother died when I was four, and until my father remarried when I was 13, it was just him. He raised me the best he could, and I know that you will do the same for your kids. It takes a special kind of person to do that. But god wouldn't have choosen you if you couldn't handle it.

I wonder if you will ever read this.

Mass

I appreciate the reply. I'm at two months without my wife now. I even had lawyers review the autopsy report and medical files to have a neutral party assure me that everything was done as it was supposed to be.

It was, its rare for this to happen, even more rare for it to happen to a woman, even more rare for it to be this aggressive. When I say rare I mean winning the lotto rare. This sort of thing is not supposed to happen.

I appreciate the reply, and i'm sorry to hear a heart infection has weakened you.

In regards to thinking all things happen for a reason, I don't believe that. I believe many things just happen, no reason, no good to come of it, they just happen, and we are forced to move on and pick up the pieces of our lives or just waste away ourselves. I believe in god, I believe one day I will be with my wife and that day isn't soon enough since I still linger.

You could name a million things that could be a reason for this to happen, perhaps you could say I could get closer to god now or maybe I will be able to help someone else in life since I endured this tragedy and be able to guide them through a similiar issue. But in all honesty there are ways to get closer to god and ways for me to help people without my wife having to be taken away. I don't believe or accept things happen for a reason, I just know things happen.... Horrible things can and do happen.

The one thing that bothers me most about the ordeal is that the clinic did everythign as normal two days before my wife suddenly went critical. If I had similiar symptoms an echocardiogram would have been performed on me and this would have been found. But this sort of thing doesn't happen to young woman.... They can somewhat see it rarely happening to young men.... But they don't think twice about this with women, they just assume a cold isn't showing up in lungs (causing chest pain). Of all the odds.... Can't believe my wife was such a rare expcetion and becomes that one in a million to succumb to this heart infection of such an aggressive nature.

I appreciate the reply. I'm at two months without my wife now. I even had lawyers review the autopsy report and medical files to have a neutral party assure me that everything was done as it was supposed to be.

It was, its rare for this to happen, even more rare for it to happen to a woman, even more rare for it to be this aggressive. When I say rare I mean winning the lotto rare. This sort of thing is not supposed to happen.

I appreciate the reply, and i'm sorry to hear a heart infection has weakened you.

In regards to thinking all things happen for a reason, I don't believe that. I believe many things just happen, no reason, no good to come of it, they just happen, and we are forced to move on and pick up the pieces of our lives or just waste away ourselves. I believe in god, I believe one day I will be with my wife and that day isn't soon enough since I still linger.

You could name a million things that could be a reason for this to happen, perhaps you could say I could get closer to god now or maybe I will be able to help someone else in life since I endured this tragedy and be able to guide them through a similiar issue. But in all honesty there are ways to get closer to god and ways for me to help people without my wife having to be taken away. I don't believe or accept things happen for a reason, I just know things happen.... Horrible things can and do happen.

The one thing that bothers me most about the ordeal is that the clinic did everythign as normal two days before my wife suddenly went critical. If I had similiar symptoms an echocardiogram would have been performed on me and this would have been found. But this sort of thing doesn't happen to young woman.... They can somewhat see it rarely happening to young men.... But they don't think twice about this with women, they just assume a cold isn't showing up in lungs (causing chest pain). Of all the odds.... Can't believe my wife was such a rare expcetion and becomes that one in a million to succumb to this heart infection of such an aggressive nature.

Hi, I just wanted to tell you how sorry I was to hear about your wife. I lost my daughter to myocarditis in july. She was only 3 and I am going through the same thing as you. I have went over the autopsy report, they also did a heart biopsy and I still have doubts, even though everyone I have talked to said it is extremely hard to detect. My heart goes out to your child, who will not understand losing a mother but my son is actually dealing with the loss of his bestfriend, his sister, better than expected. I think children are stronger than we give them credit. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I hope that you will keep me in your prayers as well.

North carolina

Dear Folks,
Two different young woman, freinds of my children, died last Saturday and yeaterday, from heart attacks. Both healthy, not obese, non smokers. One had "the flu" the other I am not sure what preceded it, but she was healthy.
Wow - I know of one other man, a priest who was 35, who died of a viral myopathy.
It just seems extraordinary it was 3 day apart.