Somebody Please Write Back

I just need to talk to someone who has been through this so if you have time please write back

I usually don't talk to the neww poeple much. Trust issues. Bit I feel a little bad that no one else has responded yet. For one if your friends are going to hate you, then you don't need them. You need friends that are going to support you. As for the guy, maybe he's just still in shock and needs time to let it sink in. You said your mother freaked out. Are you planning on keeping the baby.

Brenda

Where r u from? And what kind of friends do u have that at 17 they wont talk to u for bein pregnant? I cant imagine. . . What bad friends no offense! How far along are you? Have u been to the doctor? Will u keep the baby? Guys get scared, so if hes not being a jerk, then its probably out of fear. U might be young, but at 17 u can definitly have and raise a baby, with help which you hopefully have. You two might be scared about what your parents will do, but trust me, im sure we've all been there. U migth be surprised, they might react better then you think. If not, o well, you know they wont disown their own grandchild if u are keeping him/her. What grade are you in? You have alot to think about, but you do need to tell them asap. The sooner the better, so they have more time to adjust. Goodluck! How olds the dad by the way? By the way, I am kari , 18 and am 31 weeks pregnant. I was scared to death to tell my parents.. They were very strict too. .But hey, somehow I managed and now my mom is actually excited!

Thanks for writing back. I dont really know what you meant by trust issues but you can definetly trust me. Im just looking for anyone that is willing to talk to me about this. I live in utah and everyone here is really mormon and so is my babies father. Having sex before you are married is one of the worst things you could do here. I know tonz of girls that wouldnt kiss a guy untill they were 16. So being here just makes me feel horrible. The guy is 17 too and we are both finishing our junior year. I have no idea if I want to keep the baby or not. Sometimes I think it would have such a better life with someone else but I cant imagine giving birth to a baby and giving it up for adoption. It would be the hardest thing. But being a single mom would be pretty hard too. How did you guys know that you wanted to keep your babies and when did you know?

Well I thought about adoption a little at first.. But then I just kept thinking ''i made this baby..I already love him and hes not here.. How can I just hand him over to a stranger?''.. I just knew and still know that I cant do that. Now, if I knew I couldnt take good care of him, then I would give him up for adoption because I do love him already and will do what I have to do. Its just apersonal choice you wil have to make. Remember, there are programs now where u can meet the family and everything before hand so he/she will never go into foster care.You wouldnt consider abortion would you? I hope not but once again.. Ur choice. I think u could raise the baby if u really wanted to. And your parents would love their grandbaby. You just really need to get it out in the open so you can discuss the options with them all. (your parents and the father) when will you see a doctor? Do you know how far u are? U need to go to the doc asap.. Dont wait~ goodluck@

I think im a little over a month along. I know I need to see a doctor, but why is it important that you go really soon? What do they do? Before I got pregnant I didnt understand how someone could get an abortion. But I think I know why some people do it now. But im not going to consider it. Luckily my mom is helping me through this. The other day she said I cant believe im going to say this but have you thought about abortion? She lets me know that whatever I do she will support me. Im just getting really sad knowing I only have two weeks of highschool left. I was suppost to be a cheerleader, and I got accepted to cosmotolegy school. Sometimes I really think it would be better if I died. I ruined my life and his life. Does it get better?

First of all, I don't mean to offend you or any (caps) morman, but screw mormans!!!! You won't find me admitting often that I am a morman becasue they are hipacrits and I don't believe in their ways. They can be horrible people! Note, I said can be (caps) not are (caps). I know you are in a tough spot since so many around you are the way they are, but you need to be strong, and just so you know, you did not!! And I will repeat not (caps) ruin your life with this baby!!! A baby is a gift (caps) not a curse!! God has given you a precious life to bring into this world, and you shouldn't look at it any different! You are scared now, but wait a few months when you can feel that baby moving or you hear the heart beating, and be stong aginst those who "hate" you! And if your friends will hate you for this, then sweety, they are not your friends at all!! A true friend will stand by your side and help you t hrough things.

Stacey

I really hope that I do feel different about this baby cause its an amazing thing that I should be excited for. And with the whole mormon thing I know what you mean some are very nice people and others are so judgemental. And daniel (my babies father) his parents are definetly judgemental. A year ago they read his journal and freaked out. We werent having sex but we were getting close. After that we couldnt even go on dates with eachother. I think he is going to tell his parents this weekend. Im so scared. I really think they will physically hurt him. He has been acting really wierd lately and not talking to me much. But today he told me he cant handle being around me right now cause every time he sees me he has to face what is really going on. I hope he gets over that soon cause I need him. For all of you girls who dont have the fathers in your life, how do you do it? It seems so hard

Elyse, if you need anything, come here, these girls are just wonderful, they will quickly become your best friends. I am still getting myself into the crowd, but I am quiet and shy, so not many on here know me at all, but believe me from what I have seen, these girls are awsome, and I love it here very much!! Keep in touch, and come to them for suport when you need it, they will help you.

Stacey

Thanks so much for writing back it really helps so much to talk to people that are going through the same thing.

Hey hun, its important to go to the doc asap during early pregnancy..Because they can catch any potential problems, and just make sure everything is developing well for your baby. U need to go soon... Havent u set anything up yet? Anyhow. It will get better. The little things like being a cheerleader and cosmetology,... Trust me, a baby will be soooo much more then thhings like that. Plus, u can still do something with cosmetology. A baby doesnt mean your life is over. Some things may have to be postponed is all. But ur life is not over, actually its just getting better and you have ur life, plus another life just beginning! It will be hard being so young, but it can only make you stronger if u want it to, you will be so much more mature then others ur age and u will really know what lifes all about. And you will have a beautiful son or daughter. Just try to think about the positives. Also, if ur religious at all, just remember god wouldnt have put your baby inside of u if he didnt want it there and wont hand you sometihng you cant handle*

I really hope you are right about those things. I guess its just hard for me to imagine right now, im still so scared. I want to work things out with daniel but he makes me feel like its all my fault that this is happening. I wish he would give me a chance and we could try to make things work between us. Im going to be so sad if it doesnt work out. I dont know if I would want to marry him though. I love him but if I didnt think he loved me I couldnt do it. But if I dont marry him someday I dont know what I would do. I just found out a week ago that I was pregnant so I havent set a doc. Appointment yet. And I kinda want daniel to go with me and he hasnt told his parents yet. Is it okay if he goes with me?

Yep he could go. Goodluck and let us know!

I went thru pretty much the same thing with my babys daddy he disappeared thru my whole pregnancy he blamed me because I didnt get an abortion so he wouldnt talk to me or see me its hard I know because my babys daddy was my best friend before I got pregnant but as I got to the end of my pregnancy he started to come around and I guess he realized that it was actually happening and I had a scare where I went into pre-term labor and he was at the hospital pretty much the whole time to make sure I was ok they stopped my labor and after that he wouldnt leave me alone he was around every day and when I went into labor he didnt leave my side and now he comes to see his son every day so he will probably come around once he comes to a realization so dont put stress on urself or ur baby its not good for either of u neways write me if u need to talk , actually I would really like it if u did update me on ur situation
good luck jen