Joined: 25 Aug 2003 Posts: 1762 Location: Venice, Florida
What the Lawyer Said...... Posted: 05-13-04 04:49am
I spoke with the lawyer and he said the
only sure-fire way to get out of the house
is to be emancipated. And the only way I
can be emancipated without parentak
consent is to get married br judicial
consent if my parents wont consent for me
to marry. So I thought about it and I am
going to do it. I have no doubts and I am
positive this is what I want. So if we
can get consent, we are getting married.
Sometime very soon. I figure I will call
my mom about 10 minutes before we do it,
and tell her I am gettin married and I
want her to be there, but I am getting
married whether she is there or not.
I was just on the phone with the marriage
license office and she said we both need
birth certificates and state id's. She
said it is not guaranteed that the judge
will consent, but we can try. I really
hope they will. I'll tell a sob story
lol. She said the process can take a week
or 2 but it's worth a try. I asked her
but she said at this point I wouldn't need
proof of josh existing. That doesn't
sound right at all. Does it? Anyone know
a judge in florida who they could
influence? Lol.....I'm nervous.....I want
to talk to dewitt. It would be funny, cuz
then me josh and him all three would be
dewitt. Lmao.....Sorry im just a little
nervous, and wondering how I am gonne get
to the courthouse and such without my mom
knowing......Hmmmmmm. Maybe I can go
while she is at work???
Wow.....This is something I never thought
I would be doing at 15. But it's what I
want. I just hope the judge will consent.
I think he may if I explain my situation,
or do you think that the judge may think
that the only reason I wanna get married
is to be emancipated? Cuz it's not, it's
just half the reason I wanna get married
now. Lol. The other half of the reason
is because I miss him terribly and want to
be with him so bad.
Everyone keep their fingers crossed!!!
And hope we can do this!
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 05-13-04 05:04am
I think you should really really think
about this. Has dewitt said this is what
he wants to do, or is this just you alone?
You shouldnt get married at 15. You are
so young and really have alot ahead of
you! I dont think any judge will do it
really because you are young and dewitt is
18 right? He might not. Please think
about this alot. If you do get married
then you are stuck for a long time. Talk
to your mom first about moving with her
consent instead of going through all this.
I mean its alot of work. And it will
cause alot of trouble with your family and
his family. How do you know dewitts
really the one you want to be with for the
rest of your life? Hes still a kid
himself. You dont want to be 19 and
already divorced. I think you should find
some alternatives instead of getting
married. Its just not a good idea. Your
reasons arent that great. Because you
miss him and you want to get out of that
house? Thats not a good reason. Your
reason should be you are ready to get
married, you want to spend the rest of
your life with him and he feels the exact
same about you. Plus the judge might make
you go through some counseling because you
two are young and havent really
experienced life yet. Youve had a baby
but thats it. Will dewitt make enough for
his own place? Will you work out there?
Who will watch josh? How long will you
live at your moms? Will you transfer
schools? How will you handle dewitt going
out when your stuck at home? Who will
cook and clean? Who will get up with
josh? Does dewitt have a car? Can you
both afford to be on your own? How do you
solve arguments? These are alot of things
to think about. Have a good talk with
dewitt and his mom before you make any
major plans. Ok? I just want whats for
the best for you and josh.
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insurancegirl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Sep 2003 Posts: 5286
Posted: 05-13-04 05:39am
Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-23-04 10:11am; edited 1 time in total
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theoryofthought
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 09 May 2004 Posts: 168
Posted: 05-13-04 05:44am
Well if you feel this is right for you to
do, go for it! I waited to get married to
my husband until I was 18 and our first
was born when I was 17, so we waited only
about a year. If you are sure that you
can financially make it on your own and
excel academically, you have my 110%.
However, if there are any doubts in your
mind, don’t go through with it. Marriage
is hard enough without adding hidden
doubts or fears of failure. Good luck!
Wow. I am in shock! If it's what yoiu
want..... Go for it, but really hun,
think about it. If you are only doing it
to get out of the house.....Then marriage
will never last...... Do it out of love,
not out of the need to be out of your moms
house....
Good luck sweetie! Keep me posted!
Love,
chanda
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KissyBai912
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Aug 2003 Posts: 1762 Location: Venice, Florida
Posted: 05-13-04 07:08am
I do....I honestly love him to death. And
nikki, to answer the questions I can
remember, dewitt just got a 2nd job
working in campbellhallsville factory or
some weird name like that. He works with
his dad in the day, and he works 2nd shift
at the factory. I already spoke with his
mom about it and she asked me if I really
did live dewitt beyond the shadow of a
doubt, and I can honestly say I do. And
he's told me he feels the same way (he
actually says he loves me more, yeah
right, lol, sorry little light humor) she
said he was lookin at houses in the
newspaper last night. lmao. He's a nerd.
And if it comes down to it, I have a
great uncle who owns an apartment complex
in town and I am sure he would help us out
and rent us a place. And dewitt and I
both want this, although I didn't really
intend on it this soon. But I thought
about it all day yesterday and today
because I figured it might come to this.
Although I wanted to wait if possible.
But I am ok with this. I will definitle
keep thinking about it. Right up to the
very last minute. But we will be living
with his family until he cant get an
apartment/house whatever. And as for my
school work, I will continue going to
school. Not only because I want to, but
also cuz dewitt says I have to. lmao. He
wants me to graduate and so do i. If
nothing else he's fresh outta high school
and can help me. My cousin lives there
and is only a year ahead of me so she
could help me 2. I would have tons of
people. And although this is giving me an
excuse to get out of this house, it's not
my only reason. I love dewitt with all my
heart and I want josh to be with both me
and his daddy. And he can grow up in an
unbroken home. I know that would have
meant a lot to me. Those are all the
questions I can remember. So thanks for
the advice and support everyone.
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sparklypixie12
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 17 Sep 2003 Posts: 3099
Posted: 05-13-04 07:17am
Chrissy-you have to do whats gonna make
the 3 of you happy and if that is getting
married then go for it! I hope you will
be so happy :d
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insurancegirl
Especially EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Sep 2003 Posts: 5286
Posted: 05-13-04 07:43am
Last edited by insurancegirl on 10-23-04 10:13am; edited 1 time in total
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lee25
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 30 Dec 2003 Posts: 1018 Location: new york
Joined: 25 Aug 2003 Posts: 1762 Location: Venice, Florida
Posted: 05-14-04 00:48am
Lol it was so funny you guys....His mom
asked me if I was really sure I wanted
this and I was like I am positive I will
make a pros and cons list and I did and I
am such a nerd. There are 6 pros and 4
cons I think. The cons are mostly how
much I would miss my friends, dogs,
family, etc. We have to arrange for some
way for dewitt to be here because we have
to go fill out paperwork and then wait for
the judges decision. Which could take up
to 2 weeks. But hopefully not. Does this
sound like a story you would deliberate on
for 2 weeks? I dunno. I am going
half-crazy from the stress and anxiety
this house-hold causes me. This morning
josh woke up wanting to be rocked, and I
was just to tired to do it. So I put him
in his swing in the next room and left my
door open and a while later my mom came in
saying "i know honey, mommy doesn't care
about you, she left you all alone." I
wanted to slap her. I love him more than
anything in the world. And how am I
supposed to be in the same room with him
at all times? I leave him alone in his
crib in my room all the time. I think she
lives to pick me apart and make me hate
her. But on a more positive note, I am
going to eat a tv dinner because i'm
hungry.
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linuxChique
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 May 2004 Posts: 4535
Posted: 05-14-04 00:57am
My stepmother was the same way. She
couldn't say anything good about anything.
You just have to ignore her. Don't let
her get to you. That made my stepmother
madder than anything - the fact that
nothing she did bothered me! You can do
it!
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KissyBai912
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 25 Aug 2003 Posts: 1762 Location: Venice, Florida
Posted: 05-14-04 01:01am
Thanks hun. I'll try. But saying I don't
care about my son just hit home. Becaue
he means the world to me. But thanks I
will try!
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nikki_caro
Extremely EHEALTHy
Joined: 22 Aug 2003 Posts: 4921 Location: Right here at work!
Posted: 05-14-04 01:15am
Well maybe next time you can put the swing
where you are and he can sit there. Its
not really good to leave him alone like
that all the time. Anything can happen.
Your mom says that so you can get up and
get him. We say that too sometimes about
my sister. But she dont care. Shes like
whatever. We never say she doesnt care
about hope though. Thats just not nice.
But we say like "aww she left you, mean
mommy!"
good luck. Remember my other questions on
how will you handle arguments with dewitt,
and the cleaning and cooking and laundry.
Those things come with a marriage.
