ADVICE from someone on the recieving end........
Posted: 02-21-08 04:04am

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As a girlfriend of a sufferer of TMS for 2 years, I can say first and foremost, TMS is REAL, I've had to put up with the frustrations of being a female on the recieving end of a man who suffers from this and goes in and out of denial and acceptance because of all the conflicting information about it. Frankly, I don't care what the doctors say about how there's not enough research and its not an issue, Have any of those doctors experienced it themselves or had a partner who did? I KNOW this is a problem especially when a man who has it tries to have an intimate relationship, mabye a lot of men who suffer can live in denial because they are rarely intimate with a woman long enough to see how it affects a real RELATIONSHIP, but let me assure you if you want more than a life of solo sex, you going to have to admit you have it and take steps to correct it, I'm pretty sure the guy who wrote "HEALTHY STROKES" knows exactly what he's talking about because he suffered it himself but also learned how to correct it. If any guy out there reading this really wants to know how to please and keep a woman for the long term, he's going to have to correct this, or keep living in denial and enjoy solo sex for life. Are there any other women who've been on the recieving end of this or men who want to step up and admit it does cause MAJOR issues in a long term sexual relationship??? BE BRAVE! LETS get the real info. out there to those who suffer so they can stop hiding in denial and start the solution NOW!

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BeccaAloha


New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Posts: 2
From SOMEONE who KNOWS...
Posted: 02-21-08 04:24am

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Here's just a couple of reasons why a Male who has TMS cannot continue to masturbate this way if he want to keep a long term sexual relationship with a woman:

1. A Woman actually enjoys seeing her man masturbate and seeing his erect penis while he does it, it turns a woman on to see how confident her man is that he would caress his hard penis right in front of her
2. Masturbating in front of your woman also shows her how much she turns you on and is a great way to keep the intimacy going at times when the woman cannot or does not want intercourse
2a. There are many normal reasons and times when a man will want sex and his woman does not, (for some its dryness after her period, for some its too messy during her period, just not in the mood, painful conditions in the vagina and intercourse makes it worse, tired, sick, etc)
for all these reasons, a man masturbating in front of his woman is completely normal and healthy
3. Women enjoy sex in many different positions and do not want to be forced to only have one type of sex for the rest of their life because that's the only way their Man can ejaculate
4. Yes, we may all have our preferences of course but man and woman can and should enjoy sex from a variety of positions esp. in a long term relationship to keep things interesting
5. The pressure that a TMS man puts on his penis when he masturbates is way too hard when compared with the natural sensation of a vagina around it, therefore his penis becomes desensitized and the commom vagina does nothing or very little to stimulate this desensitized penis
6. And then there's all the repercussions and emotional strain of all this
6.a. The TMS man rarely ejaculates from intercourse with his woman and Has NEVER reached orgasm from a hand job or oral sex from his WOMAN!! again ruling out several other ways to share intimacy when a woman cannot or doesn't want intercourse
6.b. The Man and woman get frustrated from sex and all sexual encounters because eventually neither of them are pleased
6.c. the woman feels unsexy like maybe its her fault he cannot come, maybe I'm not hot enough, or whatever-----enough, etc.
6.d. the man starts to feel inadequate when he realizes his woman is not pleased because he is not pleased
6.e. the man adds even more pressure to himself to enjoy intercourse and keep an erect penis to atleast please his woman with an orgasm since he cannot enjoy one, but again this only adds to the problem
6.f. now the man has not only TMS but performance anxiety about pleasing his woman and even lower self esteem and reduced sexual confidence
6. g the woman now sensing this reduced self esteem and confidence it even more so turned off herself, and frustrated that neither can enjoy sex now, the woman is turned on by a confident man
AND ALL THIS CONTINUES TO SNOWBALL INTO MORE AND MORE ISSUES UNTIL FINALLY THE MAN AND WOMAN CONVINCE EACHOTHER THAT EVEN THOUGH THEY LOVE EACHOTHER DEARLY AND ARE COMPATIBLE IN EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF A RELATIONSHIP, THAT THEY JUST AREN'T MEANT TO BE BECAUSE THEIR SEX LIFE SUCKS, AND SO THE MAN CONTINUES TO LIVE IN DENIAL THAT ANYTHING IS WRONG WITH HIM AND BLAME IT ALL ON THE WOMAN AND THE WOMAN RETREATS WITH HER BROKEN HEART FOR ALL HER EFFORTS ARE FOR NOTHING AND THAT AFTER TWO YEARS OF PUTTING UP WITH THE FRUSTRATIONS OF LOVING A TMS MAN SHE STILL CAN DO NOTHING TO HELP BECAUSE HE CONTINUES TO LIVE IN DENIAL AND EVEN BLAMES IT ON HER EVEN SO IF ANYONE OUT THERE STILL THINKS THAT TMS IS NOT A REAL PROBLEM I CHALLENGE YOU TO EXPLAIN TO ME NOW WHY IT IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT AND NOT EVEN A REAL SYNDROME