How are you feeling?

I am doing well. Woke up an hour later than usual. Had breakfast, skipped rope a hundred and fifty something times. Did a smudge, got ready and lit a candle. I went for my walk to the labyrinth and on the way back, I went mbae the post office and found a huge package from you. It took all my strength not to open it at the post office.

I got home as quickly as I could and there it was, the green scarf. perfect. And you know, I had been praying for various people all the way and at that moment, it was your turn Homerx. So I put the scarf on my neck and prayed for you my dear. That you may get on your feet again.

Thanks very much for the coloring sheets. I sure will enjoy that. You are a great friend. You pay attention to detail.

Homerx, after I put the scarf on, I stripped the bed, put some music on, did laundry and while the laundry was going, I did dishes. I had no energy to do that before. Laundry is put away, dishes are clean, counter tops wiped and I am ready to go for a course at the AIDS office. It is about HIV and native people. I don't want to miss.

Then I got a call from a credit card that is fixed minimum payments. I hate talking on the phone to those people. I can't think properly. I have another card with them and they wanted asked if they could do a balance transfer from one of my other cards with the new card. In the confusion, I picked a card with a lower interest rate than the new card. I have another card which is even higher but because it belongs to them I did not think about it.

I called beloved husband right away and it was hard to explain myself. He said we will talk when he gets home. I kept thinking about the issue and so I called the credit card company and asked them to change from the lower interest card to their other card that I have. The card has a higher interest that any of my cards. She was still trying to convince me that I had done the thing in the first place and I told her no, I want the change done that I had just mentioned. She said it was still early and they would effect the change. I had my head straight this time.

Gotta go to the meeting. Will chat later. Love and comfort from Mson.

The green scarf got there fast! and I hope you like color by numbers...have you ever done that before? I try to pay attention to what people like and dont like I'm cool that way
I feel much better...thanks for the prayers..they help.
I have a TV and TV stand in my guest room that I am giving my neighbors across the street for there girls. They have 2 daughters that are so cute and they need a TV in there room. The one they have is black and white and very small and the one I am giving them if big and color.Its old but it works great and is better than a tiny black and whit. So I will give them that and then I will have more room for my exercise equipment.
If I have over nite company and they need TV then they can watch movies on my portable DVD player. I have plenty of movies to chose from. So thats a good thing.
Its so hot here...almost 100 degrees out there today. I hate summer here...its awful...I think I said that before but geeezzz....!!! how hot is it going to get
OK, I guess I will get busy with my chores. Mson, doesn't it feel nice to have a clean place? Clean bathroom and kitchen and everything...it just makes life better.
OK, talk later, be safe
Love,Homer

Hey Bobbie,

I am not being stubborn about the herbs it is just something I want to try in my life.

The immune system is a very important part of our body. It is the defense mechanism for the body. HIV likes to eat the immune system opening ways for illnesses. I am desperate like I said for a good immune system. I have tried acupuncture and it did help my spirit being but not my immune system. Now I am trying herbs just to see if they work.

Bobbie, you could have died from the mould. Lord have mercy.

I feel that you must feel badly that you did not fight the HPV like the other women did. Don't let it bother you my dear. We are only given that which we can handle. Forgive yourself if you hold any shame about the HPV. Accept the virus and live life.

Love is very strong. It is like I told you about my high school sweetheart Andrew. I carried him in my heart for more than 2 decades. Compared all men I met with him. Even when I got married, Andrew was still in my mind if not my heart. My beloved husband knew about it and he was very supportive. It was not until 2007 when I picked a rock for Andrew. I think that part you know. So I can understand when you say that you will love this individual all your life. I what you are saying and I pray that you meet a person like I met Beloved Husband who took me with all my diseases emotionally and physically. And being the alchemist that he is, we can start to see the gold out of the darkness. Hope you meet such a person Bobbie.

Thanks for telling me to love my husband. I do the best I can but I could do better. Like last week I never gave him a massage. I was soo tired.

Bobbie, you are a hardworker. May God bless the labour of you hands.

It is nice to see how proud you are of Mark. That's awesome.

I am at work right now. We chat later.

I love you
Mson

Please take my poll

http://ehealthforum.com/health/should-glbt -marriage-be-legalized-in-america-t143699. html

http://www.lifepositive.com/Body/body-holi stic/AIDS/natural-treatment-for-aids.asp

I left in a hurry this morning and so I forgot my green scarf. I feel naked already with out it. It is a very beautiful piece of fabric. Thanks a bunch. I have colored once mbae numbers and I am sure I will have fun. That is very thoughtful of you. In the box were also two sets of colors and two shapeners. Awesome gift. That I will have fun with that is for sure. Homerx, may God bless you and give you more. You are the coolest.

May God bless you for helping those two girls and their family. You are very compassionate. You are going to make life more fun for those girls. A new world in colour. All the best to you my dear.

Today we have the sun out. The temp is about 15 degrees C. I can't imagine a hundred and yet I might have lived in it in Kenya.

Ya a clean place chases away illness. Cleanliness is next to Godliness. It is so nice to get into bed with clean bed sheets. Now I have to put all the dishes away when I get home and make sure I maintain the house. Like do the dishes daily and watch out for clutter. Tomorrow is house keeping day so everything will flow. It has been half a year since we decluttered and we have done really kept the home declutered. But I must look out for the corners like Chris warned me. And I must get my beloved husband to clear his desk. Things are awesome at the home front.

Blessings and love
Mson

Awesome,Mson...sounds like your having a good day...that rocks! I think I am gonna and munch out...Ive cleaned the guest room and the TV and cabinet is ready for the kids. I think your right...giving just FEELS so good. I dont have much but I try to do what i can.To see the smiles on those little girls faces will be worth it. I wish I could C your smile with your colors and green scarf...I bet it looks so cute on you!
Much Love,
Homer
hi Bobbie thanks for taking my poll...

When I came in from the fields after working, I found your beautiful message. I must say it touched the bottom of my soul with your ability to reach into me. It made me cry but also made me realize I am not the only one who has loved and doesn't quite know what to do with the aftermath of love ending.

Thank you for your sweet wisdom and understanding.

Sometimes, I think we idealize love and hold it up to be more than it truly is. I had a horrible awakening this afternoon from somebody who knows Lee very well. Knew him and his ex-wife very well. He tells me a story which truly throws ice water on this whole memory thing of Lee.

The truth seems to be that Lee beat his wife when she was pregnant, broke every window in their beautiful new home, the Sheriff and helicopter had to come out. As hard as that is to comprehend, I saw one time Lee in my house completely fly off the handle and be really mean and ugly. Homer tuned into that a long time ago.

She had to move out of the house into another of her parent's homes for two weeks for the glass people to come out to replace the windows.

Now, consider what mother is going to break out every window in their house with her 5 year old daughter inside. I say NO WAY. A mother would not do that. Then she got a restraining order against him. He hasn't paid one cent in child support and yet says she is lying. Sad story. I cannot help him anymore.

I once asked Lee if he had been violent with his wife. He said, yes, but she never made a report to the police. The truth seems to be coming to light.

Mson, Homer and Beline THANK YOU for helping me cut the cord, the line, the business relationship with this guy. Now that really scares me as my first husband also beat me in the stomach when I was pregnant with Kristy. She never got over the fear of making it into the world.

I want to thank all of you, God, and especially my friend for sharing this with me. Otherwise, I could have kept going down the path wondering if I made the right decision to let him go. And, Mson, now I really have. Praise Be To God.

Your friend,

In Christ,

Bobbie

I KNEW it!

Thank GOD you are over him, MDSL (my dear sweet love)....You are free Thank you ,Jesus! Now I pray he stays far away from you and that you can reload and move up! Thats my girl!

we have blinders on and can only see part of what is in front of us. If I could go back, my life would be very different. But, we can't go back and instead have to go forward.

That nice guy from church came over yesterday and helped me pick up the cartons left in the new Cabernet vineyard when they trained the plants. Have to get it all cleaned up because tomorrow the man is coming to mow down all the grasses and weeds in the rows. He is sweet but I can tell he has a crush on me and I am just ready for a relationship. He is Catholic and a true believer and we have a lot in common. But, I can't be with him. We have gone over this before. I am not about to tell him about what happened and the HPV.

He keeps wanting to take me out dancing but I don't want to go.

Thanks for praying for me Homer and Mson.

Love you both,

Bobbie

Sorry to read about how you were hit in your stomach while pregnant. My brother beat her girlfriend when she was pregnant as a result nobody has ever seen our nephew.

Bobbie, you must tell the man everything when the time is right.. If he is the one he will stay if not, that is his own business. Don't keep stuff inside that is important.

Me I would tell.

Let's continue to pray for one another. It is a wonderful gift.

Why don't you want to go dancing?

Love and light
Mson

I woke up about 7:30am yesterday. We were going for a support group, myself and other people. Everybody checked in and soon we were having chicken soup. Then we had to drive back into town and I was late for work. I called and explained the situation. During my break I went to the labyrinth and said my prayers.

Bobbie, I am learning to love my husband more. Not to take him for granted. Last night we sat and watched his shows. Mostly cheers and Seinfield. Also Fraser.

This morning I slept in. When I woke up I tied the prayer cloth along my chest and wore some pants. My husband loved it. I was on the computer for a while and I had breakfast. I listened to music. Then I went out and basked in the sun. After that I came inside and had a nap. The next thing I knew, it was going to 6:00pm I quickly started to clean the house. I was supposed to do the cleaning yesterday but I was gone for the support group. I knew if I didn't make some effort today, I might not be able to do the cleaning in the week.

I washed the bathroom, did the dishes, cleaned the floors etc.

All I have to do tomorrow is vacuum. I was able to go out for my labyrinth walk. Bonus points for that. When I got home dinner was ready and I was hungry. Now I am going to use discipline and wash the dinner dishes. Heaping the dirty dishes up is not helping. If I want them clean, I must clean them.

Homerx, thanks very much for the beautiful container. It will be useful to put the in. You are so thoughtful.

God bless us all.

Lovingly.
Mson

Mson, you are one of the main reasons I log onto my computer to see what you are doing. You are such an inspirational human being. I am glad we share the same planet.

It is beautiful here today too. Making a brunch of shrimp, bacon, mazarella cheese with a sauce with chapolte peppers, sour cream, garlic, lime juice and cilentro.

WOW! We won a Silver Medal on our olive oil at the LA International Extra Olive Oil Competition. Had to stay up until 11:00 last night to get the results. Oils from all over the world. Walter would have been so proud of this effort. Also been invited to have a tasting at a winery and they want to sell my oil. Every bit helps.

You must look beautiful in your scarf. BH is one lucky man and you are both blessed with the love you have for each other. What a glorious day when two beautiful people find each other!

I don't want to go dancing with this new guy because I feel he is moving too fast for me. I know I am not ready for a relationship with him and no sense leading him on. He is nice to talk to but I am not looking for a boyfriend right now.

Thanks for praying for me and I will always hold you up in prayer too. Also, our beloved Homer. What would we do without that man?

Bobbie

Thanks very much for your compliments. When I stay in bed longer and feel like I am getting depressed, it is words like yours that really wakes me up.

You cook good food. Awesome.

Congratulations on your Silver Medal. Beloved Walter knows about it. He helped make it happen. Very well done Bobbie. And I like the way you say we instead of I. "We won..." Very humble. I love you. All the best with selling the oil and keep up the good work my dear.

Yes the scarf is great. Homerx has style. Thanks again Homerx. Yes my beloved husband and I are blessed and the faster I realize that, the better.

About the new guy. Take your time but surely you can go dancing.

You are always in my prayer list Bobbie. You and Homerx, Gugu, Miss Anonymous, AlmostPositive, Hart74, Carl's brother etc.

Today I slept in. Woke up and then went back to bed. Later I treated my hair, vacuumed, tidied the bed room, did a smudge, had lunch, smoked a with beloved husband sitting at the balcony. Packed my medication and slippers. We are going to my sister in law's house for father's day.

She is a nice girl who told me not to be around her when I am manic. But I can understand. When I was manic Bobbie, I hurt a lot of people that I otherwise love. My husband babysat me like a child. Watching my every move. So I am praying that for today I be on my best behaviour.

You are right about Homerx. He is a shining star. I love him.

I lit a candle for all of us.

Health and Wellness
Mson

good morning
I slept for a long time and slept heard...dont remember anything except getting in bed and closing my eyes...then I was out!I must have been really tired. We took care of washing all the dogs and Ricky mowed the yard and weeded and stuff while I changed the sheets and did dishes and what not...busy day. then we went to the Mexican restaurant and it was so good. We pigged out and came home and watched TV and and then it was bed time...I think we both just passed out....busy week end. It was nice.
Any way, today is a new week. I still cant find the birthday gift for the little girl across the street...she wanted a wall clock with a dog picture on it...I cant find one Her birthday is Wednesday so I have 2 more days to look...if I cant find one then I will get her a clock and a stuffed doggie...thats the best I can do.
My elbow where I had that wreck in San Fransisco is really hurting alot lately...dont know why, I think I may be using it too much or sleeping on it or who knows...
OK, I think I will have some oatmil for breakfast and some juice and try to wake up...and coffee
Later, xoxo,me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4mtlqIfukc

I listened to that song and it was wonderful. I often wonder what will happen when we die.

Today I woke up around 9:00am without an alarm which is awesome. Geez, I forgot to skip rope. I'll do it right away...*breathing hard* A hundred and fifty jumps. For some reason, I kept thinking today is Sunday.

After breakfast I went out for my labyrinth walk. I did my prayers and then came home and watched episodes of people preaching at me. I had lunch and then my friend John came over for a visit. After coffee and , we went shopping at the Value village which is a second hand store. I found shoes to wear at Pascale and Chris' wedding in August.

I went and basked in the sun on the balcony. I am sorry you don't enjoy the heat Homerx. Here the sun is not as hot as it should be but it is out.

Next I came in doors and read a chapter of the book, "How to become a better you" mbae Joel Osteen. I think he is from Texas. The chapter was talking about how to be a peacemaker in our own homes. Knowing how to deal with strife. Taking the upper hand. I was reading that when I change, that is when my beloved husband changes.

I watched another episode of another preacher man. He was saying we've got to know when we arrive. Often a times we still think we are stuck. We have arrived but we haven't realised that yet. That made me look into my life. I did not die in Kenya, I did not die here. Surely I have found favour with God. I have arrived. My mind knows that, my spirit is well aware but the body is staggering along. It has not caught up which is a shame. But I know it will.

Yesterday went on fine on father's day. Father in law wanted some and he bought some for us. I gave sister in law and her man a nugget and said it was from Dad. "How is it from Dad?" my sister in law asks. Beloved husband started to explain and there was this awkwardness and that is the only thing that almost went wrong. We had a great dinner. BBQ steak, prawns, asparagus, corn and ice cream with strawberries for dessert. Yummy food. They have four dogs, Wheeler, Lucy, Walter and Olive. Very happy family. They live in the middle of nowhere. All you can see is forest. It is quite the change coming from the big busy city.

I am very happy that you are so involved in your community. Helping that little girl out with her birthday present. I am sure she will appreciate what you get her. It is a very moving story Homerx. May God bless you. You are amazing.

Sorry to hear about your elbow. Hope it heals soon but meanwhile my dear you must take it easy. You should put a sling on and maybe you have to see your doctor soon when you have the vehicle with AC.

It is about 8:00pm. I will smudge and light a candle for all of us. 9:00pm I take me medication. 9 pills and then I will have a bath. Try and relax my body. Somewhere in between I will do the dishes. Discipline. We had pork chops with rice and vegetables for dinner. Thanks Lord for food.

Tomorrow is another day and I hope to do some coloring. Very exciting about the "Color mbae Numbers." Thanks Homerx for those.

Goodnight.

Wi chat later.

Hugfully and lovingly
Mson

without joy in my heart just reading your words of hope and encouragement. Mson, you and Homer are two very special souls. You inspire me. It takes a lot for me to be inspired, but you both have that very special gift, the gift of encouragement. and hope.

Going to bed.

Talk to you tomorrow.

Bobbie

Morning I think today I have to get on the treadmill...I have slacked off for 2 days now I dont have an excuse, just being lazy. I cant lift weights because of my arm but my legs work so I have no excuse for not walking....
I am glad Mson had fun at the BBQ and enjoyed visiting with every one. Thats always nice. I have to go searching for that clock today for the little girl...its so hot and I have no AC so I wont travel far...
Hope you both are doing well...talk to you later.
Peace and Love,
Homer
Hmm....hold on tight to your dream
Yeah...hold on tight to your dream
When you see your ship go sailing
When you feel your heart is breaking
Hold on tight..ooh..to your dream

Hmm....it's a long time to be gone
Oh....time just rolls on and on
When you need a shoulder to cry on
When you get so sick of trying
Hold on tight to your dream

When you get so down that you can't get up
And you want so much but you're all out of luck
When you're so downhearted and misunderstood
Just over and over and over you could

Accroches-toi a ton reve
Accroches-toi a ton reve
Quand tu vois ton bateau partir
Quand tu sents ton coeur se briser
Accroches-toi a ton reve.

When you get so down that you can't get up
And you want so much but you're all out of luck
When you're so downhearted and misunderstood
Just over and over and over you could

Yeah....hold on tight to your dream
Yeah....hold on tight to your dream
When you see the shadows falling
When you hear that cold wind calling
Hold on tight to your dream

Ooh yeah
Hold on tight to your dream
Yeah...hold on tight...
To your dream
Hmm....hold on tight to your dream
Yeah...hold on tight to your dream
When you see your ship go sailing
When you feel your heart is breaking
Hold on tight..ooh..to your dream

Hmm....it's a long time to be gone
Oh....time just rolls on and on
When you need a shoulder to cry on
When you get so sick of trying
Hold on tight to your dream

When you get so down that you can't get up
And you want so much but you're all out of luck
When you're so downhearted and misunderstood
Just over and over and over you could

Accroches-toi a ton reve
Accroches-toi a ton reve
Quand tu vois ton bateau partir
Quand tu sents ton coeur se briser
Accroches-toi a ton reve.

When you get so down that you can't get up
And you want so much but you're all out of luck
When you're so downhearted and misunderstood
Just over and over and over you could

Yeah....hold on tight to your dream
Yeah....hold on tight to your dream
When you see the shadows falling
When you hear that cold wind calling
Hold on tight to your dream

Ooh yeah
Hold on tight to your dream
Yeah...hold on tight...
To your dream

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7ChoM2Rh60

I woke up and went back to bed the next thing I knew, it was 11:30am. Good Lord my body is tired. I wish the body could catch up with the soul and the mind.

Had breakfast. All dishes were clean in the kitchen. What a great reward. I lit the candle and prayed. I have pictures and things to remind me who to pray for. For you Homerx I have the "today I said a prayer for you" and for Bobbie I have a button. These are only the initial prayers before the labyrinth prayers. I love praying.

Somewhere in between I managed to skip a hundred and fifty jumps with rope.

I had lunch and got ready to come to work. During my break I went to the labyrinth but I did not finish my prayers. I must remember to pray on my way home. Prayer is so neat coz you can pray anytime anywhere beneath your breath and nobody knows.

I will be off work in five minutes. Go to the market and get juice, milk, buns and lunch meat. I will have dinner and will surely do the dishes. I must apply discipline if I want me to do things.

I will listen to your song when I get home. Thanks for your love.

Always with love and light
Mson

Mson, hi! How R U? Bobbie, good morning!How R U? I am fine. It rained quite a bit yesterday and that has cooled everything off. Its in the mid 80's today. Hot but not too bad.
The little girl across the street has her birthday today. I couldn't find a clock with a puppy picture on it so I got her a couple of dogie posters and a High School Musical Clock. Did I already tell you all this?
Anyway, I really slept last night. I walked on my treadmill and dusted and did little things around the house. I still cant lift weights because i don't want to hurt my right arm any more...I think its messed up permanently. Really, it doesn't seem to be getting any better. Its like the bone has been damaged or something. I will wait a bit longer and if it doesn't change I will tell my doctor although I don't think there is much to be done for it...
OK, I hope you are having a good morning.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtVoW7Gz-Ow &feature=related