To Homerx February 17, 08

Still haven't talked to Bobbie directly but she was on earlier and I think she is getting rid of that vulture for good...BOBBIE!!!! Here is a song just for you...JUST DROP OFF THE KEY,LEE!!!!!
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I have to say I love you guys. I don't know how to download all your great music. I will have Mark show me when he comes home. Drop off the key Lee is so appropriate but I never gave him one. But, will change the gate code.

I feel the stars are all lining up for me. The new vineyard manager was out here today with all his insurance, licenses, and first he had to get past my vineyard manager who knew and loved Walter and put this vineyard in for us 8 years ago.

He wants to put everything onto a battery operated system. He is telling the new guy he will supervise it and then we had gone over the booster pump and all the other water systems, and I am starting to feel sick. That is going to cost thousands of dollars which right now I do not have. Would have to borrow the money. I don't want to do that. So, I called and thanked him and said until I can get income coming in I just can't do it right now. He was very nice and said he will back down. He doesn't have to. He is the one who says it is crazy for me to be climbing up and down these hills turning on the water six days a week. That is just the way Lee put it in.

The new guy is sending a crew out on Monday to start cleaning up the Cabernet and Viogner as I have been putting way too much water on them and they are growing wild. I am growing vines, not grapes. Then we will begin training the new vineyards.

I feel relieved that Lee is not sucking my energy and love for himself and his own reasons. Never for me. Always for him and his problems.

Thanks for hanging in there for me friends. There are worse things I could be going through than surviving this. God loves me. I am blessed. We are all blessed in all good ways.

Love,

Bobbie

Bobbie, just click on them and they will play for you...xoxo,me
P.S. You are SO very blessed...I love the fact that you keep your head up and always find light in the dark..you are so special to me,my dearest Bobbie.. please know that as time goes by the hurt will fade...you will never forget but the open sore will become a scab and then a tiny scar that will be invisible to everyone although you will remember where it was......

You are such an inspiration to me. You could easily have become a priest, maybe you are a layman, a priest living and working among the faithful in the real world. That is what you are. Mson, too.

I believe you. It will get better. It was never all that good with the waiting, all the pain that went into it. Not even the good times could overcome my own doubt and being upset by thoughtlessness.

I wanted to say on the little puppies, that now they are California puppies. They are going to be living the high life. Sitting on some rich mommie's lap out by the pool, with their little sunglasses on and maybe a cute little swimsuit. Living the Life of Riley! Definitely destined to be the king and queen of all they survey.

Alan Jackson, the country super star, has the same little dog. He says his wife and daughters spoil that dog rotten. She has her own wardrobe and is just way too sweet.

Got to have breakfast. Get on here and it is hard to get off.

Love you sweetheart, dear Homer,

Bobbie

Just to be sure it is not confused with the definition one can Google to find. I had the biggest laugh on what Beline found out. Just gotta think before I open my mouth or start typing things onto this forum. HaHaHa. So funny.

The man who will do the spraying came out and also said, he couldn't believe I have already had the Cabernet and Viognier shoot thinned. Now have to pay for it to be done properly this time. He can't get in there and spray and the plants can't breath which means I could get mildue and lose my entire crop. Lee did not take care of my vineyards. He still says he is the best. Sorry. No, he is not.

Then Joe said my new vineyard manager is his and his dad's vineyard manager and he said, "He Is The Man." My place is beautiful. Good decision to have him on board and to get Lee out of the picture. Totally.

I cried when I read what you said about all of your friends dying from AIDS and that you were the last one left. God, always keeps the best for last and to serve him which you are so lovingly doing with your witness of love and faith on this forum Homer. You are so loved. You and Mson are truly apostles speaking out with love and truth.

Who would have believed when the AIDS epidemic hit and people were in a state of shock, denial, fear and hate, that this could be turned around to now there is love, hope, respect and acceptance? There are people who can't and won't consider any disease because somehow they have it in their brains that it will never happen to them.

We are all living proof that we live in a human body, a body that is imperfect and frail sometimes. A body suseptible to disease. There is never going to be one living thing on this planet that can escape the fact that we are born, we live and eventually all will die. Just the way it is. It is the pathway on that journey and the love and friends that we meet that make this a trip not to be missed.

Love to you MDSO.

Bobbie

Amen, dearest. You said it! The journey is the adventure, not the destination. I often think about Fred and Bruce...my dearest friends...I miss them so much. And Tony. And Tommie... I could go on and on. I hope they are OK. I often think I feel there presence then *puff*...the feeling is gone and I feel alone again...I wish I knew...I really wish I knew. Faith is hard to have sometimes. At least it is for me. I want proof. To hell with faith, give me some proof...but alas, I have no choice but to believe...I have to..

Out of every cloud, sunshine will come through. When I read your words about your friends you loved and miss, my heart felt it Homer.

You can and are able to feel their spiritual presence near you. I know it is true. Walter came to me after he died and I could feel him behind me just as if he were truly there. He told me he was fine and to go on and have a happy life. It was really him.

He came to me one other time as I was standing looking out over the new vineyards worrying about the huge investment and what it had cost me in more ways than one. He said, "don't be so hard on that young man. He is only trying to help you." And, in many ways Lee did help me with the vineyards.

We had lunch here one day and our priest was here. We asked him about feeling the presence of our departed ones. He said that there is a real presence and you can feel them. They are just in a different dimension from us that is all.

Where is Mson? Where are you dear lady? Has something come up that is hard for you right now? I feel something has happened. Let us hear from you. You are treasured and loved.

Bobbie

I was wondering about Mson myself... I hope she is OK and just out there doing her thing and 2 busy to get on line...
thanks,Bobbie for the inspiration...

Hey friends.

The only thing wrong is that I haven't done my dishes for days. That depresses me. The grill is socked and dirty dishes everywhere.

I have been busy working at the club Busy paying bills and rent. Monday I did two presentations in a local school. A student came and told me she was a result of a rape and that her mother's boyfriend was abusing her verbally. When he came to her house, she had to go out or go to her room. I thought that was not safe and so I told her teachers. Another student was telling me that her mother was raped mbae her grandfather. Generations madness affecting the children. These kids were 12 years old.

As I let my light shine, I unconciously give other the person to do the same. The more I am liberated from my own fear, my presence automatically liberates others. Nelson Mandela . I am frightened mbae what my work can do. Thanks for your prayers because they are being answered.

From Tuesday to today and tomorrow, I have been working at the club. Your prayers are really working because at the club, we extended our hours and that means my beloved husband and I get extra $$. We can afford to pay ourselves pocket money every week. That is what we were missing, pocket money. My lover of a husband has also got a small income coming every two weeks. These is all because of your prayers. I have no doubt.

Then a school that paid us $100 sent a cheque today for an extra $125 saying they really appreciate what we are doing. It is amazing.

The admin also wrote me asking if I wanted to be a supporter and I was busy with the application forms and questionaire. That lifted my morale and I will be doing my best in this new capacity. Again, it is all your prayers.

I have been so busy that I haven't had time to get laid.

More next time.

Thanks for checking on me. All is well.

Love
Mson.

Mson, I am so happy for you...blessing abound! How cool is that????? Praise the Lord! Its amazing,huh? I am so happy for you...I had to say it again...extra $$$ is going to come in handy. I know what you mean..its pocket $$ that I miss..just the little extra few bucks to spend on coffee or a treat or whatever...but it will come. Together we can rise above anything...we are connected as one..its GREAT! Hallelujah!!! threw him all things are possible. You know, yesterday i was so down and so depressed and today I feel happy to be alive again.... I love you, my friends...I really do...

How wonderful is all this good news for you Mson. You are an amazing giver and now it is coming back to you. They say what you give with a willing heart will be given back to you ten fold. I believe it.

Please continue to pray for me for I am weak in my feelings of totally slamming the door in Lee's face. All he has to do is make a call and thank me for my kindness and for listening to him and advising him and it just tears me up. He knows the name of the new vineyard manager. I don't know how but he does. I told him it is best for us not to work together anymore. He says we will still talk and he will see me around. So, I don't know what I have accomplished here except please God in time, that I will get him out of my heart.

I am starting to think with his past history, he never lets anybody go. He is not letting his wife go with this ugly paternity test he is going to submit her and his baby son to. What a huge mistake that is going to be. She has his children and the power to hate him big time. I have begged him not to go through with that. It is his life and only he can live it.

This is turning into a Greek tragedy.

Bobbie

Great to hear that you are making progress. You did tell Lee it is best that you don't work together but are those your firing words? It is May 30th today and you can still write that termination letter if you haven't. It doesn't have to be long Bobbie.

I am always praying for you Bobbie and now I pray that you may have the courage to cut the cord like I did with Rosemary. She is just another woman in the world. Her judgement of me doesn't get to me and she is NOT in control of my life. You can do it Bobbie. It is the same as removing the bad tomatoes so that all the tomatoes don't rot!

In our hearts we store abuse, bad relationships and so on and so forth. It is very hard to function with these things in out hearts. We might function but believe you me we won't be present to experience life in full. So we must be ruthless and let go.

Some time in 07, I picked up three rocks. One for my high school sweetheart who never left my heart, one for Rosemary and one for Jessy. The rocks signify the place in my heart where issues to do with these people existed. Now it is out of me and into the rocks. The rocks are on my alter and they remind of what I have had to let go. The burdens I was carying and still trying to live life with two major illnesses.

It doesn't come easy as even today I still struggle with Rosemary. It is a step at a time but the step has to be taken.

I will continue praying for you.

Now I will get ready and go to the lab at the hospital. I have had breakfast. I will skip rope, smudge and light the candle. Actually I don't have time right now but I will do that later. I am supposed to treat my hair and clean the home but I slept in after being in a performance of women telling their stories last night. After watching my friend David perform, I decided that I will never speak the same again. I will add drama to my presentation. Then it can stick longer in my audience.

Things are looking up Bobbie. You are right, freely we give, freely we receive. I work later this afternoon at the club

Better get going to the lab, hope you terminate Lee's services officially. You have the power woman.

Love you
Mson.
http://ehealthforum.com /health/watche-david-take-back-his-power-u tube-t142284.html

Hi ladies...I have been busy cleaning I just wanted to say hello and hope U R having a good day...I think its going to be very hot here from now on...the cool weather is gone and summer is here. Ug! I don't like summer in Texas, too darn hot and humid so I will be staying in doors until the fall....
Ok, talk to you later...

The new vineyard manager brought out his people and they were very good workers. I was out working in the rose gardens, and I heard the women singing as they were working in the grapes. Beautiful voices. It showed me a very powerful sign that they are the ones to be here now. They are very spiritual people.

When we planted those grapes 8 years ago, I worked with four brothers who planted them. I prayed for each and every one of them and sang to them. Now these women have felt the joy and expressed their love through song for my babies. Praise God!

Homer has helped me beyond belief. He has been down the path I have been travelling and knows I don't have to be there. Light is better than darkness. Homer knows that and is such a light and shoulder to lean on for advise.

Mson, I love you and thank you for your prayers and support. God doesn't make mistakes. We were all born at the time of our coming in for a reason. I feel one of those reasons is because we can come together in this time and place and wrap our arms around each other, give love and support to each other and trully care. Look how God loves us.

Bobbie

To acknowledge, you have to give a name. Ignore the name, ignore the presence that the person brings to you.

Are you sure you didn't study for years for the priesthood? You are a very human and understanding man. I love you Homer. Thank you for all you have done for me with your human kindness and understanding. I treasure and bless you for all that you are. A person we can all be proud of. A man who loves and gives back to others.

I had a wonderful time tonight. Went to the winery dinner and the nice man from church who is very nice and caring met all my friends who love me. They all liked him. I told them I am not about to get involved with anyone. But, it was nice to have good company. I sat with two couples, one a doctor and a vineyard owner and would you believe the doctor to my first vineyard manager who thinks the world of him. They appreciated the women singing in the vineyard today. They know what that means.

Waiting for my people to come back from dinner. It is kind of like putting the puppies down to bed before I can retire to mine.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Bobbie

I know, house guests can wear you out...especially if they are paying Well, enjoy them and maybe they will tell 2 people and they will tell 2 people and on and on and youll be booked for a year or 2 in advance. Wouldn't that rock??? Have a great day...and Mson too...

I woke up really happy this morning. My new vineyard manager has 12 people out there training the new babies onto the cardion wire which will support them.

My guests are really nice. They came down from where I used to live. He is a VP Attorney and also a cowboy. Very nice. I made them orange scones for breakfast. Tomorrow, homemade buttermilk biscuits.

Got to have breakfast.

Bobbie