Joined: 05 Feb 2008 Posts: 1015 Location: From Kenya, Now in Canada
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Bobbie my dear! Posted: 04-12-08 22:45pm
I had decided during the day that I was
going to tell you a phrase my friend Andy
told. He said, "I hope you can overcome
your loneliness and attain your full
potential." Then I came here and read,
"help Lee overcome his emptyness," then I
did not not know what else to say. Walter
gone as he is will show you the way
because he wants you happy. In fact, he
needs you happy. What is happy to you?
Define happiness and count your many
blessings, name then one mbae one, and it
will surprise you what the Lord has done.
Guests are here, house is clean. Beloved
Husband (BH) took all the garbage out
after I bagged it for him...
It is now 8:37pm. The guests have left.
Dinner was chicken and bacon melt. Mashed
potatoes, and veggies. It was very good.
For dessert we had banana cream pie. I
have done half the dishes and soaked the
rest for tomorrow.
Just sitting back enjoying a glass of
wine.
It has been a good day.
Till later,
It's Mson with love
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missanonymous
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Hello again!! Posted: 04-13-08 03:27am
Sorry for my
absence everyone!! Been SUPER-busy w/
school and work...Hope everyone is ok. I'm
feeling alright. I feel bad for not coming
on here for so long though. I
haven't forgotten any of you though!!
So I got my two test results..the thyroid
one, and the HIV one. Both came out
negative! I asked the doctor
if I should get tested for HIV one more
time in a few months just to be sure..She
said I should if I "want to be anal about
it" (her words). Going for a HIV test is
never easy, and it's not going to get
easier..But I will take my final one in a
few months. Better safe than sorry...
As for the thyroid...Well...It's normal,
so I'm not fat because of an underactive
thyroid..I'm fat because I overeat and
don't exercise!
I still have no explanation for the lumps
on my legs and the swollen arm thing.
Again, I'm very sorry for my absence!! I
will get back to all of you soon!!!
MUCH Love,
MA
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Muthoni
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Miss Anonymous Posted: 04-13-08 12:02pm
Praise the Lord!
I am really glad that you do not have HIV
and that you have no thyroid. I have been
praying for you and will continue to pray
for you. Very happy to hear that you busy
with school and work.
I hope you take care of yourself mbae
resting, eating and exercising.
I am sorry that there is no explanation
about the lumps on you legs and the
problem with your arm. I hope you can
find a doctor who will help you with
that.
You don't have to apologize for not being
here. You are fresh in my mind everyday
in which I pray.
About testing again, people are asked to
test again because there are a two percent
of people who do not show up positive
until after six months since exposure. It
is all about peace of mind.
Thanks a lot for checking in.
Love always
Mson.
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Roberta777
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Beautiful Here Posted: 04-13-08 15:05pm
Good to hear from you Mson and you always
have pearls of wisdom.
I have been a spiritual counselor for a
long time and at one point had a healing
center. I know spiritually what is going
on with a person. With Lee, he knew that
and still wants that part of me to listen
to him, heal him, counsel him. But, he is
a heartless person. A person who takes
without looking back at his own
responsibility of abandonement. I know
that.
As I said, when I start cutting those
ribbons and letting him go, he is back
trying to reattach them. Not in a
physical way because he says I am diseased
and he doesn't want to catch anything from
me. Lee never stops to think of how cruel
his words and heartlessness can hurt. He
is the one who gave HPV to me. It is
still almost incomprehensible to me I was
stupid enough to let him get into me,
emotionally, sexually and spiritually.
Just bad choices and decisions can land
you where I am now.
I am going to wait until after harvest,
and then he is out of here. He complained
last week that he has put in so much time
and effort into developing this vineyard
he would hate to see some jerk come in
here and get the credit for the grapes.
He most certainly was paid and overpaid
for what he did. And, I am not just
talking about getting into my life and
giving me HPV with the high risk types.
Now I have genital warts. He still denies
that he, his GF or wife had them. Must
just be me. Dr. Nikola said their immune
systems were able to overcome it. Mine
did not.
Going through the different vineyard
blocks, I have been cheated. But, what
can you expect from a cheater? Maybe Lee
needs to retain that attorney on a full
time basis.
I honestly do not feel lonely. Pretty
happy here with my beautiful home and my
babies who are growing by leaps and
bounds. I had wanted to post a picture of
the Viognier at budbreak. Now they are
already 12 to 14 inches high. And loaded
with flowers which will be come the
grapes.
Thanks Mson for praying for me. You, too,
dearest Homer.You have your hands full
with those sweet little puppies Homer and
it is good to hear from MA. Thank God you
are going to be o.k. Look to Mson and
Homer for inspiration. They live healthy,
well rounded lives and are such a blessing
of encouragement to me.
Take care,
Bobbie
|
homerx
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Posted: 04-13-08 15:05pm
I second Mson, MA....no worries...keep on
doing your thing and check in with us when
you can...xoxo,Homie
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homerx
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Bobbie Posted: 04-13-08 15:08pm
Glad to hear your babies are growing
strong...keep on keeping on, my
friend....
One Love
Peace of mind is the most important thing
in life....
|
Muthoni
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My day. Posted: 04-15-08 00:07am
I did my morning routine then I went to
check email and this is what I found.
Someone had read some things I have
written on the Internet and he asked?
how were
raped by Dr Mumo?
I wrote back
I was
working for the late professor Jasper Mumo
as his secretary when he was chairman of
the department of human pathology. I was
in the back room typing exams when he came
and held me tight from behind and forced
his way with me. I am glad he is
dead.
He wrote back
Thank you
for telling me that...I knew him very very
well. How could he do
that with you without your consent? But he
was also something like a
Church Elder in AIC Ziwani!! His wife also
seemed like a godlly woman!
Oooh I am sorry ! Where are you now? You
also said something like you were
HIV positive by then? Dr Mumo's death was
questionable somepeople thought
he made it through suicide.
Please keep intourch
I wrote back
He was
also said to be a free mason with Moi. He
was very godly out there but his actions
did not show that godliness at work. He
had been known for extra marital affairs.
Yes I had AIDS at the time but I was not
telling anybody because I had my own
dignity to safe guard. Plus, if he was
behaving this way, he deserved what was
coming his way. Did his wife survive the
accident? I felt sorry for her.
Right I am in Canada. I have been here
for almost 12 years. Still looking for
papers. Very difficult to land in Canada
with an illness like AIDS.
Maybe Jasper's death was suicidal I have
no clue. I don't care.
He wrote back
Jasper's
wife, Rhoda, survived but I do not know
her whereabout at this
time. The last time I saw her she was not
healthy but I thought it was
just a stress. Yes, I can agree he must
have been a free mason with Moi.
I know the family so well they even used
to have marriage problems--often
fight. I do not doubt what you are saying.
Minneh, would you mind if I
call you on phone?
I gave him my number. Was ready to face
the bull mbae it's horns. He called in
the evening and he explained to me that he
was in Califonia and Jasper my ex boss in
Kenya was his foster father. He was very
kind and said he would look for Rhoda so
she and I can keep in touch. My
beloved husband when I told him the story
he told me to be careful not to get
stalked. He has been stalked before. But
this had to do with my experience of rape.
I wanted to make sure that I got to the
end of it. This person is from my country
Kenya.
It was a frightening day. The past back
to haunt me
This boss raped me just before I came to
Canada. I resigned.
Peace
Mson
|
homerx
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Posted: 04-15-08 11:00am
Mson, I dont know...I would think twise
before giving them my address or phone
number. That is in your past. Maybe it is
for the best to keep it there and to not
be in touch with those people..but the
decision is yours. Why would they even
want to talk to you? Its over. Leave it.
But you are smart and will do what is
right.
I must go to town now and do all my
running around. Check back later. Have a
great day...love,HomerX
|
Muthoni
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You MAYBE right Homerx. Posted: 04-15-08 11:39am
Then this morning I found an email from
the same guy telling me to donate some
money for a school being built in Kenya. I
DEFINITELY DON'T HAVE THE MONEY.
I know it is in the past but still fresh
in my heart as I realized after this guy
contacted me. It was over ten years ago
that the rape happened and still coming
back to haunt me. Lord have mercy on me
and heal my soul from the refreshed
wounds. Amen.
My morning started at 8:45am. I did my
devotion, made the bed and started
laundry. Beloved Husband and I smoked a J
I am going
to wait for the wash to finish and while
the clothes are in the drier, I will treat
my hair. I do it at home to save time
going to the salon and money. Every three
months I do to the salon for a relaxer.
I have to work this afternoon.
Thanks for the warning about giving
address and phones numbers out to
strangers. He is from my country. Maybe
I am just homesick...
Love - Mson
|
Roberta777
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Be Careful Mson Posted: 04-15-08 12:08pm
For sure don't give that guy your home
address. I hope it is unlisted. God only
knows what his motives are. You just
never know. This is a complete stranger
to you Mson. What has this done but get
you all stirred up inside and bring back
that painful and horrible thing that
dreadful man did to you. Maybe he got
AIDS and found out later and couldn't deal
with it.
Rape is a violent, vicious and horrible
act of violence against a person's body
and soul. It is never about sex. It is
about power and the abuse of it.
Listen to Homer. He would never stear you
wrong.
Sorry about all this Mson. You are such a
dear and caring person. You have never
deserved this to happen to you.
This guy sounds like a player to me.
Already hitting you up for money. And you
work hard for what you get. You get a
little ahead, save it for a rainy day not
to just hand it out to some yahoo with his
hand out.
Bobbie
|
homerx
Moderator
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Posted: 04-15-08 15:27pm
Listen to Bobbie....don't even contact
them....let it go, let them go...
|
Roberta777
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Hi Mson Posted: 04-16-08 15:49pm
Where are you Mson? We miss your sweet
spirit and genuine love for life. Hope
you have not allowed that person who
contacted you to upset you and disturb
your life. You are a very careful,
thoughtful person who likes order in your
life. I can tell that about you.
We miss hearing from you.
Take care of YOU.
Love,
Bobbie
|
homerx
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Posted: 04-16-08 17:22pm
Hope all is well,Mson.... my Queen
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Muthoni
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Homerx and Bobbie. Posted: 04-16-08 21:39pm
I am doing well but I must say that I have
been a little bit disturbed mbae this
occurrence. It was about 12 years ago
when the rape happened and it has come
back to haunt me just as I am recovering.
When I gave him the number, I gave him the
business line. I was in a panic and
everything was happening too fast. It is
like a bad dream.
He wrote me back and said, when I said i
didn't have money:-
here is no
problem I am with you! Some is going to
give me Rhoda's number
and I'll forward it to you. I understand
she is sick too.
I am glad to know you.
I wrote so much on the Internet when I was
trying to clear my mind. The Internet was
my friend. So this guy read about how his
foster father raped me. I never really
thought about the fact that this would
follow me into my future. I was mainly
clearing my head.
Thanks soo much for your advice both of
you. I am doing well. I am drinking
vodka. This too shall pass. You make me
feel needed and wanted. Thanks both.
Always with love
Mson.
|
homerx
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Posted: 04-17-08 10:19am
You are needed and wanted and so is
Bobbie..we all are...
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Muthoni
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Thanks Homerx. We should all feel loved and cared for. Posted: 04-18-08 11:47am
I woke up about 8:55am.
I pat myself on the back. I have had
cereal. Devotion I have already done.
We have a girl visiting us from Up Island.
She is a daughter to our friend. She
looked beat mbae life when she got here
three days ago but she is starting to look
better. The last time she was here was in
2006. I was going through a depression
and was not taking care of the house. She
was doing what she could. I found some of
my clothes where they were not supposed to
be and I thought I was missing some other
things. Beloved husband said that we
should give her another chance. So we
are.
I don't want her to be left in the home
mbae herself or to be given keys to the
apartment.
Now I am going to skip rope a hundred and
fifty times, do the smudge, light the
candle and start house keeping. Then I
will go for a walk and do whatever the
timetable tells me to do until I have to
go to work for 2:30pm.
The Creator has been awesome to me and I
keep giving Him thanks and praise.
Always with love
Mson.
|
homerx
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Posted: 04-18-08 13:28pm
Mson, keep a close eye on that girl...I
hate when people steal from me when I am
trying to be nice to them. That has
happened to me as well and it isn't a good
feeling. I have a nephew who I cant leave
alone in my house because he will go threw
everything and take what he wants. We all
work hard for what we have and it is not
right to steal especially from people who
are being nice to you...
I am going to the store to get ingredients
for Ricky to make a stur fry Chinese dish
tonight...chicken and onion and bamboo
shoots and carrots and
well, now I cant remember what all he puts
in it but
it is SO delicious. I better call him to
ask what I should get at the store...
Talk to you later, love,homer
|
Roberta777
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That Is Just Plain Violation Posted: 04-19-08 19:35pm
I know what you are both saying when
people are allowed to come into your
space, your hearts and instead of feeling
safe and loved there, they decide to
instead take and steal from you. That can
take on so many forms. Stealing of trust,
stealing of love, the taking of physical
things, of possessions, what exactly do
they do with those things when they leave
and arrive at their destination? They
have to look at what they have taken from
a good person and feel pretty low inside.
Remember, they have to get their fix for
the moment by taking. Be it rape,
homicide, taking our posessions, whatever
it takes to get them through the moment.
Only problem is, in the next minute they
are right back where they started from.
Alone, probably pretty miserable inside,
not feeling love because you have to love
yourself first and foremost.
All this is a journey for us. I love your
amazing strength and courage Mson and your
willingness to be able to love and
forgive. You don't have to forgive that
man who raped you. It is healthy to
honestly admit you are glad he is dead.
We are human. Better to be honest with
yourself Mson. Who honestly could forgive
that? Sounds like he couldn't forgive
himself. Otherwise, why is he out of
here?
Love to you and Homer and to all,
Bobbie
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Roberta777
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Pretty Hard To Believe Posted: 04-19-08 21:22pm
That someone actually reported the above
post as being abusive. Go figure where
they are coming from.
I support Mson, her courage in giving of
herself in educating people about
HIV/AIDS. Homer, too.
For those who can't accept, tolerate or
understand that some of us actually do
care for each other, well, sorry for you
and the circumstances that made you into
what you have become.
On the other hand, those of us who care
are not about to change. We are all
walking our own path. We alone can walk
it. We alone can live our lives. We
alone. And, of course, it is nice to
share with others of like mind in our
journeys.
Bobbie
|
Muthoni
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Bobbie my dear! Posted: 04-20-08 00:44am
What happened?
I am being very careful. Today at noon we
had to go visit Pascale and Chris. So I
gave the girl $10 and asked he to mbae
pads and use the rest to go to the
hospital. It seems like she has a
fractured tail born. I also gave her 4
quarters so that she can call us or other
people. My beloved husband said that I
was a good Christian. She left
before we left. I did not want to leave
her around the house. We are back now and
it is just wonderful to know nobody was
going through our things.
Thanks for your explicit writing Bobbie.
You couldn't have said it better.