I am 23 years old, and i've been sexually active since I was 16. I've been suffering from pe from that long, although i've had 'regular' sex quite a few times (usually 2nd, 3rd, 4th times having sex in a day or weekend). I've done researches on the net for that long too, although i've never found anything conclusive. I am about to consult with an urologist anytime this week, and i'd like to sort a few things out before I do.
Most information i've found on it blames it on psychological issues. Anxiety could be one. I can clearly see a circle: suffering from pe during the first intercourses with a woman (i've had sex with 3, 2 being long-term relationships), she gets growingly uninterested in sex; anxiety grows as sex gets less common, until the point where the woman's desire is almost none. But then there's a question: if it's anxiety, how come I can have sex for quite a few days in a row, and then one week without sex and pe is back? I mean, over the last few years, i've certainly grown accustommed to sex.
But I don't know what other factors are involved in this circle. I've recently diagnosed myself as having a minor phimosis (currently being successfully treated through stretching), which before prevented the skin from rolling back farther than the base of the glans when erect. I can do that now, but I don't know if that will have any implications on pe (it has proven itself to help penetration, no ky needed anymore). Has anyone heard of that kind of associated problem?
I've tried thoroughly the master & johnson technique (is that it?), with start-stop, stop-press, both by myself and with partner, and distraction. And they haven't seem to have helped at any time. I've tried quite a number of different approaches, including: ignoring it and just keep on having sex; repeatedly having sex (which helps for the moment, but pe is back after a few days); being totally open with the woman as to what to do about it; satisfying her as well as I could before penetration (foreplay for as long as she could stand -up to more than 1 hour- before sex, so I could feel comfortable and calm about it - doesn't help); drinking alcohol (doesn't help unless it's lots of it); masturbating (doesn't help unless it's less than 2 hours before sex);among other stuff i've read on the internet or books. None seem to have helped, which makes me suspect the problem might be somewhat phisiological (hyper sensibility?). If it's stricly psychological, i'd say i've tried a little of everything in the last years, and maybe it just keeps adding on expectations. What other treatments are there available?
It's only in the last few weeks that I have become definately decided to treat myself. My intuition says I should try some kind of medicine, at least something that will hold my erection, so I can be able to please my girlfriend enough for her to be interested in sex in the long run, and solve pe through long-term of regular-basis sex.
I don't want her to be too involved in treating this problem. I feel she's already given her full support and I think she deserves some "stressless" feedback.
I'm sorry for the long and somewhat unclear message. I just wanted to get these thoughts out of my head, and was hoping I could get some more notion as to where i'm standing. Whenever I read pages or other posts in this subject, I see answers that don't apply to me for one reason or other. Thanks for your support.