Did your doctor do an a scan (ultrasound or CT scan)?
It's possible you have a kidney stone or kidney infection. Bladder infections are painful but this seems to be more than a bladder infection, at least to me. I have been suffering with kidney/urological problems for over 30 years so I'm speaking from experience, if you are this uncomfortable get to an ER or call your doctor back and insist on them doing an ultrasound.
Does it hurt when you drink more fluids?
Do you feel like someone punched you in the kidney area?
Do you have blood in your urine?
As for the incontinence it can take a couple days for that to get better once the medication kicks in. I know it's embarrassing. Did you tell the doctor about the incontinence?
There is medication to help with it, it is Ditropan and there are a couple others they prescribe also.
I hope you feel better soon..