See, yours was a case where divorce was actually the right decision. I see so many cases however where it's just the spouses being selfish. Divorce is there for people like YOU, not for the people who get frustrated because suddenly the honeymoon is over and money is tight.

Some people are willing to take that sacrifice for the sake of fairness. Just like I'd be willing to be falsely accused and end up getting the death penalty simply because I support the system.

It really all depends. I think sometimes men get the shaft when it comes to child custody-well a lot of the time actually. But other than that, it's kind of a case by case thing. Sometimes men get screwed, sometimes women get screwed.

If a lot of the time they get the shaft, then it's clearly not a case-by case thing...

My first husband and I got married way too young. Didn't have to but we did. Problem was I never loved him and he only wanted what he thought he could get from my parent's farm.

When I did get pregnant, he used to punch me in the stomach. I was so scared. Then he told me that he could shoot me and take our baby and my parents would never find my body.

So, I decided to make a plan and get away from the sick crazy jerk. And, I did.

I also worked two jobs like Sistersister. My family took me in to live with them in Detroit.

No, he never paid any support but he said that he never would. That was fine with me just to not be near him. Don't you think that for men to support their families there has to be this little equity line of credit = sex. They don't get it, they don't pay child support.

Honestly, I don't know why women choose men who are horrible husbands and terrible fathers who just walk away from their responsibities.

I do know that for all I went through, I did meet my beloved husband whom I truly loved. We were married for 41 years and I can tell you it seems like days, not years. We should look for real love, respect and the common interests of our lives and familes which will pull us through to a stable relationship.

I'm seeing a lot of "I think" or "I Feel" but not any proofs being posted. Yes in times past men often 'got the shaft' in divorce because the law thought the mother was always the best parent. Not so true anymore.
Lets try a little fact into the emotive side of this dicussion.

In 1995, the number of family groupings with children under the age of 18 was slightly more than 35 million households, a 25% increase from 1970. In 1995, single parent households made up almost 31% (11 million)of the total family groupings with children under the age of 18. Of those 11 million single parent households, 15% (1.7 million) represent single, custodial father households, a 330% increase from 1970. In 1995, 2.5 million children lived with only their father. This large increase seems to be the result of a combination of several factors. First, the introduction of no-fault divorce laws, gender-neutral criteria, and greater attention being paid to children's wishes in the court systems make it easier for fathers to gain custody when they seek it. This, coupled with the explosive divorce rate, accounts for some of the rise in single, custodial father households. Second, is the behaviors of mothers. Many women choose to pursue career or personal goals over family interests and favor father custody. Additionally, some mothers with psychiatric, or physical conditions are not able to care for their children. Third, the increase in joint custody arrangements may also contribute to the increase in single, custodial father households. Also, mothers remarry and relinquish custody, or one parent moves and the child moves too, creating a de facto single custody arrangement. Finally, fathers today are more willing than fathers in the past to become full-time caretakers of their children. The vast majority of fathers who have custody gained it by mutual agreement, rather than by a court battle.
Source

you are seeing a lot of I think or I feel because that is what I ask for.. their personal opinion!

15%... so in most cases, the children are still going to the mothers. I can't really see how that study is proving any of us wrong. Oh sure, it was worded as "an increase of custodial fathers since the 70's!" and put a real positive spin on it, but the cold hard fact remains true: Most of the time, women end up with the children.

When you have been up all night with a kid who is sick and has just vomitted on your last clean bed sheet, you have no money for the laundry mat until payday in a weekd, you daycare provider tells you that you cannot bring a sick kid to her house and your boss tells you that if you do not show up for work you don't need to ever come back, paying child support and getting the kids on your day off sounds like a much better deal than getting a check each month that barely covers the cost of daycare.

Having said that, most mothers really want the custody of the kids and do what ever it takes to care for them. However custody is no free ride to a child support check and most women either do not get that check on a regular basis or if they do it does not begin to cover half the actual costs of careing for a child in either finacial or time.

my mom used her child support checks to go to the bars, pick up men and by vodka and ciggs...so I guess there are all kinds and it depends on the person.

That is the absolute truth in all things.

first brought home her to be first husband, they were carrying a baby. By another relationship with him and this girl. He had offered if she would just have an abortion, he would get her a puppy. She said no. That child wound up better in the long run than my legitimate three grandchildren from this man.

I told my daughter at the time if she married Charles, he would give her three children, walk away and he would never support them.

It would up to be true. Only thing is, after years and years of non-child support, she actually forgave him the over $187,000.00 in child support due to her and her children because she said "he needed a driver's license, Mom."

I feel that it is the parents who are responsible for children they bring onto the earth. Not their own parents. Not the system. Not the courts who sometimes have to split it down the middle.

I wasn't purposely focusing on one sentence. It seemed however that the fact that only 15% of men get the children means just that: Women end up with the children in most cases. I am currently not assigning a moral opinion on this, I'm just simply saying that it is true: Women more often than not end up with the children.

You definately were focusing on just one sentence or you would have quoted everything you were using.. again.. pony up your 'facts' proving men 'get the shaft' in divorce.

I'm not saying "men get the shaft" now am I? I am simply saying "In most cases, women get the children" and your own source has proven that.