I'm 15.
I suffer from depression.
And i used to cut and bruise myself when i
was 12 and 13.
at age 14 my school found my scars and
brusies, and my mother found out.
Now, im finding myself depressed and i
have no way to get my mind on somthing
else.
IF you want to know, the reason i cut and
bruise-
when i get sad/mad/hurt i cry and i feel
like im going to explode. and by cutting
myself it kinda relives me. And when i see
the blood, i feel comfortable, and my mind
is now on that. And same with brusing,
when i get depressed, i take an object and
it myself with it multipule times until i
cant really feel that place anymore, and
when i dont that, i feel relived.
Now, my mom can see if i cut or bruise.
And somtimes i cut my legs. but now i seem
to be obsessed with blood.
I know this isnt normal.
is it?
please help me.
i need to know what to do when i get
depressed and feel the urge to harm my
body.
|
PenguinsRus
Moderator
Joined: 05 Nov 2007 Posts: 1178 Location: New York, NY United States
Thanks: 28
Thanked:8
Posted: 02-08-08 12:00pm
It is normal to feel the urge to hurt
yourself when you are upset if you have
learned in the past that hurting yourself
soothes you. However, it is not healthy.
Is there anyone you can talk to about
this? Talking to people can help a lot.
How did your mom react when she found out
what is going on? Was she supportive?
Could she be possibly someone you could go
to and seek help from?
When you get sad/mad/hurt, you say you
feel like you are going to explode and
cutting yourself relieves you. I used to
be the same exact way. Any time that any
little thing would set me off, I'd feel
like I need to run to the knife or punch a
wall or do something like that. Something
that really helps would be to get a
punching bag to hit...pick up boxing, or
maybe pick up an activity similar to that.
It really gives you a great outlet for
aggression.
Sometimes even just screaming into a
pillow feels great.
As for saying that seeing the blood and
being obsessed with it...a way to help
yourself with that if you want is to take
red food coloring, and place it/squeeze it
where you normally cut yourself across
your leg/arm/wherever. This way it looks
like blood and you get the visual
stimulation without harming yourself. I
know it might seem lame, but you should
really give it a shot. It can be just as
calming.
|
aquachickola
New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 06 Mar 2008 Posts: 15 Location: , FL USA
Posted: 03-08-08 22:13pm
I'm the same way about the blood- i tried
burns or bruises but nothing seemed to
help/ relieve the way that blood did. For
me, it was asthough all of my tension and
stress and everything poured out with it.
I really like the food coloring idea. Iv'e
also been told that using red markers,
coloring instead of actually on an area
may help as well.
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