Premature ejaculation is the most common
sexual dysfunction. There is disagreement
on what exactly qualifies as premature
ejaculation - some doctors or sex experts
say that it's coming after a few minutes,
others say it's coming before your
partner. 30% of men live with premature
ejaculation, according to a survey
conducted by the National Health and
Social Life Survey (NHSLS). Unlike
erectile dysfunction, which in most cases
is physiological, premature ejaculation is
more from lack of practice in controlling
their orgasm. But like erectile
dysfunction, the biggest harm premature
ejaculation causes is to a man's
confidence.
There are a few techniques that have been
proven useful, and are helpful whether the
problem is chronic or only from time to
time, such as with a new partner.
One form men have employed to halt getting
off prematurely is to masturbate before
sex. Young guys can get off several times
a day, no problem, but for older men
who've never learned ways to halt their
orgasms before now, there just aren't the
same reserves.
The most common of all methods in fighting
premature ejaculation is to think about
something different. I'm sure you've heard
the line "Just think about baseball." I'm
sure you've even tried it at one time or
another. And it may have worked, even.
This method should be used in times of
emergency, when all else has failed, but
we want you to enjoy sex more, not less.
Thicker condoms are probably the easiest
fix of all. The thicker the condom the
less sensitivity, making it harder for you
to get off and thus making sex last
longer. Have you seen the ads for thinner
condoms, claiming they increase
sensitivity? While it is effective in a
sense, it's also similar to thinking about
baseball - the method's success is built
around you enjoying sex less. This also
doesn't fix the problem, it simply masks
it. Why not try a technique that really
works without dulling your enjoyment?
It's going to take a little work before
you're at the top of your game, but it
will be worth it. The start and stop
method and breathing exercises are both
crucial. First practice the start and stop
before masturbation. Masturbate as normal,
but this time as you feel yourself coming,
stop. When you've calmed down a bit, as in
you're no longer close to orgasm but are
still hard, continue. Do the same thing
again. See how long you can do this for.
With practice, how long you can hold
yourself orgasm will increase. Practice
with a partner is crucial. While you're
having sexual intercourse, stop when you
feel yourself starting to come. While
inside them, have you and your partner
keep still. Kissing and caressing can
still continue. Start moving again once
you feel yourself calm enough but still
hard.
Breathing is so vital to holding off
getting off. Breathing through your mouth
increases heart rate and signals to your
body that you're ready. By breathing
through your nose in steady breaths,
you're in control. Like with the start and
stop method, practice is vital. If this is
a little too hard, try breathing in
through your mouth and out through your
nose.
For those who want to go the extra mile in
extending sex, and thus enjoying it for
longer, there is meditation. Meditation
has been used for hundreds of years in
sexual practice. I'm sure you've heard of
Sting, the lead singer of the Police,
claiming he has sex with his wife for
hours. This is due to tantric sex, a part
of Tantra which is a tradition of Hinduism
and other belief systems rooted in Asia.
Extremely difficult and intense to learn,
it is only one example in which meditation
will help your sex life.
